A shocking revelation has just come to light that proves once and for all that we never really know the people who are close to us: Your otherwise normal friend is very active on LinkedIn.

Absolutely shocking. It’s baffling that someone in your inner circle has been able to live a double life for so long.

According to numerous media sources and eyewitness accounts, the person you’ve known for almost a full decade, the one who seemed like a well-adjusted and productive member of society, is also shadowing as a person who writes long posts on LinkedIn talking about things like maximizing client engagement and how to nail job interviews at marketing firms. It’s like your friend is secretly a completely different person—an alter ego who has completely immersed herself in the bizarre and alien social ecosystem of LinkedIn.

It really is always the people you least expect! This whole thing must be making you rethink everything you knew not just about your friend, but about reality itself.

One of the most surprising things about this Earth-shattering discovery is that when you talk to your friend in real life, there’s absolutely no evidence that she even thinks about LinkedIn at all. You’d never think for a second that the same person with whom you’ve been carrying on regular human conversations for years also goes online to say things like, “Q3 is truly the forgotten quarter, but ignore it at your peril!” and, “AI is totally changing the SEO game…for the better!” We’ll give you a minute to adjust to this news, but we figured it was important for you to know.

It’s almost like your friend has split herself into two entirely different people. One is just an average woman who relates to her fellow humans on a meaningful emotional level, who’s active in her community and is always kind to her friends and family. The other is, according to her LinkedIn profile, a “Client-Oriented Content Specialist And Strategic Storyteller” who “is deeply passionate about building communication solution platforms from the ground up as part of a mission-driven and results-forward team.” It’s really amazing that she was able to hide this part of herself from you, but hopefully you’ll be able to rebuild some of the trust that might have been lost here.

The truly scary thing about your friend’s double life as a LinkedIn super-poster is that it raises all sorts of questions about who else in your community might be logging on to LinkedIn when you’re not around to congratulate strangers on completing three years as a junior copywriter at an advertising firm that writes branded Instagram posts for a cold brew brand that nobody has ever seen in stores and might not actually exist. Anybody you pass on the street could be on their way home to write a 500-word post about cover letter hacks. For all we know, you could be extremely active on LinkedIn. The entire world is built on an edifice of lies and deception, and we all play our sick little roles in keeping the grotesque facade going forever!