Cinema Buffs Rejoice! They’re Finally Turning People Getting Shot With Guns Into A Movie

Whether you’re a diehard cinema buff or just a casual movie fan, there’s probably one story you’ve been dying to see on the silver screen that up until now just hasn’t existed. Well, after years of praying, it’s about to happen: They’re finally turning people getting shot with guns into a movie! 

Yes! Yes! Yes! This is going to be a cinematic game changer!

For years, film fiends have been down on their knees begging that people getting blasted right in the head, chest, and legs with powerful guns be adapted for film, and after long last it’s officially been greenlit. Details about the yet-to-be named project are so far sparse, but Hollywood insiders are reporting that the film aims to faithfully tell the story of bullets tearing through flesh and ending human lives in a way that truly does the original justice. Hopefully we can expect to see the guns making very loud sounds, the blood really spraying out, and the chunks of bone and organs splattering everywhere just like they do in the source material.

Seeing the impressive glory of gun violence in a larger-than-life, stylized way on the big screen has always been a bucket list item for most moviegoers, but the challenge of showcasing holes being blasted in men, women, and children with shotguns, pistols, and rifles in a way that is satisfying and interesting to the viewer has, up until this point, kept Hollywood away from the subject. We applaud the daring filmmakers behind this project for taking a chance for their art and accepting the challenge of what could truly be one of the most momentous occasions in cinema of all time. 

This. Is. Huge. Shut up and take our money! 

Sure, there’s always a chance that people being shot with guns (be it accidentally or intentionally) as a movie will be a big letdown just like other challenging film adaptations have ended up being, but we’re hoping that the combination of bullets flying out + blood going everywhere + the victims of the shooting being killed/maimed result in some truly compelling cinema. This is one piece of celluloid history we’re going to need to see on the biggest screen possible!


Marty Macaroni

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