PARIS — In what officials are calling a powerful testament to successful integration, large groups of recent arrivals have begun expressing their gratitude for France’s generous welfare system, free healthcare, and open borders by methodically setting cars, shops, and occasionally entire city blocks on fire. “We are so thankful,” explained one community representative while supervising the combustion of a row of parked vehicles. “France gave us housing, monthly payments, and schools that do not insist we learn French. Burning things is simply how we show appreciation back home. It is only fair we share our culture.” Government spokesmen praised the development. “This is multiculturalism working exactly as intended,” said a Ministry of the Interior official. “They are no longer rioting against France. They are rioting with it, in the spirit of shared values. The important thing is that no one is forced to assimilate.” Police reports indicate the expressions of thanks have been especially enthusiastic in certain suburbs, where the number of vehicle fires has risen in rough proportion to the number of new social-benefit recipients. When asked whether the pattern suggested any difficulties with integration, a sociologist from the University of Paris replied that the real problem was “Francophone privilege” and the lingering expectation that newcomers might eventually adopt local norms. Meanwhile, a coalition of doctors and engineers—both native and newly arrived—has issued its own statement. They announced they will join the festivities and begin burning hospitals and infrastructure unless their already-high public salaries and pensions are increased further. “We have worked hard to reach these positions,” one physician told reporters. “If the state can afford to house and feed hundreds of thousands of people who arrived last year, it can certainly afford to give us more. Otherwise we will have no choice but to express our disappointment in the traditional manner.” President Macron’s office released a brief note thanking everyone involved for their “vibrant participation in French civic life” and reminding citizens that any criticism of the burning would itself constitute a failure of inclusion. Firefighters, for their part, said they remain committed to diversity and will continue responding to calls, provided the calls are not phrased in a way that implies the fires are undesirable. The post Immigrants Issue Heartfelt Thanks to France for Its Inclusivity by Burning It to the Ground appeared first on Genesius Times.