Conservative Satire
Conservative Satire

Conservative Satire

@conservativesatire

AOC: ‘Under Capitalism, Man Oppresses Man. Under Socialism, It’s Just the Opposite’
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genesiustimes.com

AOC: ‘Under Capitalism, Man Oppresses Man. Under Socialism, It’s Just the Opposite’

For too long, the defenders of the status quo have clung to a tired talking point. They repeat, with the solemnity of people who have never had to wait in line for toilet paper, that under capitalism man oppresses man. As if this is some devastating indictment rather than a basic description of human nature with a price tag attached. Let us be clear. Capitalism does involve oppression. The landlord raises the rent. The employer schedules you for 29 hours so the benefits stay theoretical. The algorithm decides your feed, your credit, and occasionally your career. Man oppresses man, yes. The oppression is distributed, competitive, and often comes with free shipping. pic.twitter.com/E6btyW8We9— Genesius Times (@Genesius_Times) November 8, 2026 Socialism, we are told, solves this. It removes the profit motive, socializes the means of production, and replaces the invisible hand with a visible committee. In theory, the hierarchy dissolves. In practice, the hierarchy simply changes uniforms. Under socialism, man still oppresses man. The difference is organizational. The factory manager is replaced by the party secretary. The landlord is replaced by the housing allocation board. The boss who can fire you is replaced by the official who can assign you to a different city, a different job, or a different set of ration coupons. The oppression does not vanish. It becomes centralized, ideologically justified, and considerably harder to quit. This is not a bug. It is the feature that keeps the system coherent. Someone still has to decide who gets the apartment, who gets the promotion, who gets the scarce medical equipment, and who gets to speak without consequences. When the market is abolished, those decisions do not become more democratic. They become more political. The new managers answer upward, not outward. Accountability runs to the party, not to the customer or the voter with exit options. Critics will say this is a caricature. They will point to Nordic models, worker cooperatives, or municipal broadband as proof that a gentler path exists. Those examples are interesting. They also tend to retain private property, competitive markets, and the right to fail. The moment the state becomes the sole employer, the sole landlord, and the sole allocator of opportunity, the old joke stops being a joke. Under capitalism, man oppresses man through contracts, prices, and the occasional ruthless efficiency. Under socialism, the oppression is administered by people who have read the correct books and therefore know what is best for you. The direction of the boot may change. The boot remains. We can argue about the preferred flavor of hierarchy. We should stop pretending one of them abolishes it. The post AOC: ‘Under Capitalism, Man Oppresses Man. Under Socialism, It’s Just the Opposite’ appeared first on Genesius Times.

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Start Your Engines: Liberal Women Announce They're Ready To Have Sex Again Now That Abortion Will Be Legal
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babylonbee.com

Start Your Engines: Liberal Women Announce They're Ready To Have Sex Again Now That Abortion Will Be Legal

U.S. — Men broke out in rejoicing upon learning that in the wake of the midterms, all the lovely, gorgeous liberal women of America were ready to end their sex boycott.

Dozens Come To Faith After Church Purchases Golf Simulator
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babylonbee.com

Dozens Come To Faith After Church Purchases Golf Simulator

BARTLESVILLE, OK — Dozens of local residents were welcomed into the faith this week after Cornerstone Church purchased a golf simulator.

Promises Kept: Democrats Deliver On Affordability By Making Stocks Way Cheaper
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babylonbee.com

Promises Kept: Democrats Deliver On Affordability By Making Stocks Way Cheaper

U.S. — Democrats proudly announced that they had already delivered on their campaign promise to improve affordability, having made stock prices far, far cheaper in just a few days.