A Little Too On The Nose: This Aunt Looks Just Like An Aunt

Lovers of subtlety, prepare for disappointment, because the following story is going to make you shake your head: This aunt looks just like an aunt

Woof. Has this woman forgotten the importance of nuance?!

Though she could have chosen any aesthetic in the world for her signature look, 55-year-old Melissa Bakerman has decided to embody “aunt” so thoroughly that she looks like she could be playing a cartoon character named “Aunt Melissa” on an exaggerated animated TV show. From her short, spiky gray haircut to her funky glasses to the bright pink lipstick that’s always just slightly on her teeth, there’s really no way to see this woman in the wild and think anything but “that’s an aunt, all right.” Which is fitting, because that’s exactly what she is.

C’mon Melissa, don’t you think this is a little too on the nose? 

Though Melissa could use her clothing as a way to show the world that there’s more to her life than her relationship to her nieces and nephews, she instead alternates between cheetah print and zebra print blouses that all but scream “my sister or brother has kids.” Worse still, she chooses to pair them with bedazzled, heeled booties or neon green leather sneakers that might as well have been found in the “aunt” section of a J.C.Penney. 

At least Melissa’s nieces and nephews will never be confused about whether or not Melissa is really their aunt. Just by looking at her, you can confirm that she 100% is. Aunt Melissa, you really hit the nail on the head!


Marty Macaroni

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