It’s time you had a laugh after all the ridiculously nasty rhetoric floating around the nation. In Ashland, Virginia, a racoon needed a snort…but overdid it a little. Okay, a lot. It was a racoon bender.

Raccoon gets drunk at an ABC liquor store in Ashland, Virginia, and passes out in the bathroom.

Hanover County Animal Protection says the raccoon “ransacked” the store before passing out next to the toilet.

“Officer Martin safely secured our masked bandit and transported him back to the shelter to sober up before questioning,” Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter said in a statement.

“After a few hours of sleep and zero signs of injury (other than maybe a hangover and poor life choices), he was safely released back to the wild, hopefully having learned that breaking and entering is not the answer.” Colin Rugg

Video from the liquor store is from WAVYTV 10:

Probably had an argument with his wife pic.twitter.com/8wfHc1cO6u

— Dave (@Davely_X) December 3, 2025

“Bro this raccoon walking into a Virginia liquor store, raiding the shelves like a tiny fuzzy bandit, chugging whatever bottle it could claw open, and then passing out drunk in the bathroom is the most American wildlife story ever told, this little trash-panda basically role-played a full frat boy weekend, broke in, blacked out, and woke up to police staring at him like “sir have you had anything to drink tonight,” and the image of a raccoon sprawled on the tile like a middle-aged dad after tequila shots is so wild it almost feels symbolic, like even the animals are tired of inflation and politics and decided to self-medicate with bourbon, and honestly I respect it, that raccoon lived more life in one illegal liquor bender than half the country does in a decade, absolute king behavior.” @Dan_Brisbois

Raccoon walked in sober, left with a hangover and a criminal record. Black Friday deals hit different ? @LanieASassyVet

And he was released on no charges. This justice system is broken.@Mericamemed “Released to the street just so he can go do it again.”@CollinRugg

Humanity will only survive all the garbage we encounter daily if we can laugh both at ourselves and the situations around us. The Bible declares that a “merry heart does good like a medicine.” This racoon bender qualifies.

*****

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