I’m trying to run a serious news organization here, but some of you won’t let me! So yes, to everyone who has sent me this story and asked me to cover it, I give in…. Here you go folks, on a day where we have massive news breaking left and right, I interrupt that news to bring you a report that according to a recent scientific study, women’s farts smell worse than men’s farts. From the NY Post ladies and gentlemen: Women’s farts smell worse than men’s — and there’s science to back it up https://t.co/DF8AMOZFfH pic.twitter.com/4c38ZO4EuH — New York Post (@nypost) December 4, 2025 I don’t know why, but I am personally offended by this Scientific Study and I would challenge the author to a competition! I’m pretty sure I could even up these odds! Personally, I have always found women’s farts to be more of the “musty” variety, with men’s farts to be more “meaty” if that’s the correct word to use. So just like I disagreed with “The Science” when “The Science” was Dr. Fauci, I disagree with this Science too! The NY Post reveals that the “Scientist” behind this Scientific Study is known as “The King of Farts” (I also take great offense that he has stolen my nickname!) and not only that but he’s been working on this since 1998! On average, humans fart up to 23 times a day, but not all of those toots are created equal. Research shows that women’s gas smells worse than men’s, and there’s a scientific reason why. But next time you catch a whiff of your wife’s wind, take comfort — that stink could be a sign that she’s less likely to develop Alzheimer’s. Back in 1998, Dr. Michael Levitt, a gastroenterologist and prolific researcher known as the “King of Farts,” set out to figure out which gases give flatulence its signature funk. He recruited 16 healthy adults with no history of gastrointestinal issues and had each of them strap on a “flatus collection system,” which was essentially a rectal tube connected to a bag. After the participants chowed down on pinto beans and took a laxative, the researchers collected their subsequent farts. Next, Levitt and his colleagues ran a gas chromatographic–mass spectroscopic analysis to break down exactly what was inside those bags. They also put the samples to a sniff test. Two judges were brought in to rate each fart on a scale of 0 to 8, with 8 being “very offensive.” They were unaware that they were smelling human flatulence. The researchers found that the main gasses responsible for the odor of human farts are sulfur-containing compounds, most notably hydrogen sulfide — the chemical behind that classic “rotten egg” smell. And while men tended to pass larger volumes of gas, the study found that female flatulence contained a “significantly higher concentration” of hydrogen sulfide than that of their male peers. The judges agreed, rating women’s farts as having a “greater odor intensity” than men’s. It’s no wonder women tend to get more embarrassed about their farts. A 2005 study found that heterosexual men were the least bothered if others could hear or smell their toots, while heterosexual women were the most self-conscious. But here’s the twist: Women might actually want to embrace their smellier farts because they could be doing their bodies a favor. While hydrogen sulfide is highly toxic in large amounts, small doses — like those found abundantly in women’s gas — may help protect aging brain cells against Alzheimer’s disease. Love to hear what you think… Who wins out here?