Every few years, NASA opens its astronaut applications to the general public, which means that for a brief window, any private citizen with a dream and a keyboard can throw their hat in the ring. Most people who aren’t qualified simply don’t apply. Comedian and writer Alex Falcone took a more committed approach: He applied anyway, then wrote his own rejection letter in NASA’s voice, eviscerating the application he’d just submitted. To be clear up front, because the joke only works if you know this, the letter is not real, and Falcone has never pretended otherwise. He wrote both halves—the absurd application and the withering institutional reply—as a bit and published the whole thing on his Medium blog, The Weekly Weep. As he later told Bored Panda, the rejection isn’t genuine. He wrote it himself. The comedy is a man conducting a one-sided argument with the space agency and losing badly. Michael gets declined by NASA byu/bigshortsfeet infunny Falcone’s self-assessment sets the tone. He described himself as someone with no useful skills who is hard to get along with on long trips, having, by his own account, ruined multiple road trips and book clubs, and who gets motion sick easily. In other words, a man who understood the assignment of “reasons not to send this person into space” and met it thoroughly. The fictional NASA’s replies are where the piece lives. When his application apparently offered that he’d seen Masters of the Universe and felt that should count toward the required master’s degree, the letter is unmoved. When he listed enjoying the part of Apollo 13 where the crew improvises an air filter and noted he likes space Legos almost as much as pirate Legos, the agency responds with the only sensible verdict: “Perhaps you can apply to be a pirate.” His dig at the other “nerds” applying is met with the gentle reminder that the application exists to explain why they should hire him and also that the people reading it are, themselves, those nerds. It keeps escalating. The letter declines his request for “no meetings before noon.” It confirms, with strained patience, that astronauts do not get a “plus one” to the moon; that yes, he would have to tell his wife if he were going to the moon; and that it is sorry to hear she “is a worrier.” It assures him there is, in fact, only one moon. And it notes, in what may be the single best line, that since astronaut ice cream was “90% of the reason” he was applying, he might be satisfied to learn it’s available in the gift shop and online. If I ever were to apply to NASA, this is the rejection letter I would get. byu/RyanTellsaStory infunny The bit landed well beyond Falcone’s usual audience, getting picked up by humor sites and, as he noted with some delight, discussed on Australian radio. Part of why it works is that Falcone is a veteran of rejection in a way few people are. As he told Bored Panda, years of getting turned down by comedy festivals and writing gigs gave him a thick enough skin to find the form funny rather than painful. He used to comfort himself with the fact that Michael Jordan didn’t make his high school basketball team until he watched the documentary and realized Jordan responded by growing several inches and working relentlessly, which, Falcone admits, he is not doing. The full letter is worth reading in its entirety, and that’s genuinely the best way to enjoy it, not in summary. It’s a tight piece of comic writing that understands a truth most motivational posters get backward. Sometimes the dream is more fun as a joke than it would ever be as a job, and the rejection, when you write it yourself, can be the best part. The post A comedian applied to be a NASA astronaut, then wrote himself the rejection letter he deserved appeared first on Upworthy.

Simon Pearson went to his doctor because he was exhausted. What he came away with was a diagnosis that would shadow the next seven years of his life: polycythemia vera, a rare and incurable blood cancer, compounded by hemochromatosis, a genetic disorder that floods the body with toxic levels of iron. As reported by SWNS, Pearson, a 41-year-old business director from Tamworth, England, was told the fatigue was a symptom of something that could eventually kill him. He believed it. There was no reason not to. As he later explained, he trusted the doctors at George Eliot Hospital in Nuneaton completely, the way most of us would. So he did what the diagnosis required. Between 2017 and 2025, Pearson underwent 42 procedures to remove blood from his body, a standard treatment for the conditions he was told he had. The detail that makes this hard to read is that Pearson has a phobia of needles. He sat through 42 of these procedures anyway, terrified each time, because he believed they were keeping him alive. The psychological weight was heavier than the physical. “For years I was in and out of hospital, believing I had a condition that could eventually kill me – sometimes lying awake all night, terrified,” Pearson said. Worse than the fear for himself was the fear for his kids. Both conditions can be hereditary, and Pearson, who has two sons, was haunted by the thought that he might have passed something fatal on to them. He carried that guilt for years. Then, in 2025, a nurse at a routine appointment noticed something that didn’t add up and flagged it. The concern triggered further testing. Those tests delivered a result that upended everything Pearson thought he knew about his own body: He did not have polycythemia vera. He did not have hemochromatosis. He never had either one. A subsequent patient safety investigation found no medical evidence to support the original diagnoses and concluded that Pearson had been, in its words, subjected to clinical practice that caused him harm. The hospital trust admitted a breach of duty, accepting that proper care could have spared him all 42 procedures. A doctor meets with a patient and his family. Photo credit: Canva. Pearson has since launched legal action with the medical negligence firm Irwin Mitchell, seeking support for the psychological toll along with compensation for lost earnings and increased insurance costs. He has described struggling to absorb the reversal, saying the realization left him feeling unmoored from reality itself, which is its own kind of aftershock. Spend seven years bracing for death, and the news that you were never dying does not simply arrive as relief. It arrives as a question about everything you reorganized your life around. The hospital has apologized without reservation. Dr. Naj Rashid, chief medical officer for George Eliot Hospital NHS Trust, said the Trust offered Pearson its sincere apologies for the failings in his care, acknowledging that it had fallen below the Trust’s usual standards and caused him significant distress. “The Trust has carried out a thorough investigation into what went wrong and have put in place actions to address issues identified to ensure this is not able to happen again,” Rashid added. There is no neat lesson here, and it would be glib to pretend the takeaway is “question your doctors,” since most of us have neither the training nor the standing to second-guess a specialist, and blind distrust of medicine causes its own harm. What the story does underline is the quiet importance of the nurse who looked at a long-standing diagnosis everyone else had accepted and decided to ask anyway. It took seven years and 42 procedures for someone to stop and check. The person who finally did changed Pearson’s life in a single appointment. The post A dad endured 42 needle procedures for a cancer he never had. A nurse finally caught it. appeared first on Upworthy.

One of the best things about Olive Garden (besides the breadsticks) is the finely hand-shredded Parmesan cheese that gets piled liberally on top of every soup, salad, and pasta dish they serve. Of course, servers leave it to the customer to decipher the amount each dish gets topped with. And it’s the pile of fluffy goodness that has become a signature for the restaurant chain. But people are just finding out that what they thought was Parmesan cheese (also known as Parmigiano Reggiano) being sprinkled on their food—is actually not Parmesan. Thanks to Internet sleuths and former Olive Garden employees, the trade secret about the cheese they really use has finally been revealed. Olive Garden’s “parmesan” cheese Food YouTuber Ordained Cue spilled the secret to followers that Olive Garden’s alleged Parmesan cheese is actually Romano cheese. “Olive Garden has been lying to you and you didn’t even know it—and it’s about their bottomless parm that they serve,” he says in the clip. “They’ve been fooling us all along when they come around to your table and offer you freshly grated parm for your pasta.” Specifically, he explains that Olive Garden is still using a real Italian cheese, a Romano cheese from an Italian cheese company called Lotito. The reason: real parmesan is simply too pricey due to standards on ingredients and production. Parmigiano Reggiano’s standards Parmigiano Reggiano is regulated in Italy under the Consorziodel Formaggio Parmigiano Reggiano, and must meet a number of criteria to be deemed legitimate. The Consorizio defines Parmigiano Reggiano as a “hard cheese, obtained from cooked and slowly matured paste, made from raw cow’s milk, partially skimmed, produced by cows whose feed consists mainly of forage from the area of origin. Romano cheese is described by Stella Cheese as “similar to Parmesan, but with a sharper, saltier bite that adds a pleasantly tangy flavor to a wide variety of dishes.” But back to Parmigiano Reggiano. True Parmigiano Reggiano is classified by where it is produced: “the milk and the cheese are produced in Italy in the defined geographical area which comprises the provinces of Parma, Reggio Emilia, Modena, Mantua (on the right bank of the Po river) and Bologna (on the left bank of the Reno river), in compliance with strict standards.” There are also four guidelines for ingredients: “Dairy cows fed mainly withforage from the area of production (Silage is forbidden); Milk, cheese making process, and minimum aging (12 months) in the area of origin; Always only 3 ingredients: milk, salt and calf rennet; and 100% of the wheels checkedby the Consorzio.” Former Olive Garden employees share more The source of the Lotito Romano cheese info is allegedly a number of former Olive Garden employees, who took to Reddit to inform the world after someone asked what cheese Olive Garden was grating on their dishes: “I never knew the exact blend or brand (maybe I just didn’t pay attention) but when I worked there the ‘parmesan’ was actually a cheaper kind of romano.” “I’m an ex employee so I cant check for 100% certain but online it says they use lotito brand romano cheese and the images do look exactly like what we used!!” “Yes a manager once told me it was lotito brand. I once tried to contact lotito to buy my own blocks of romano from them and they wouldn’t sell to me bc I wasn’t affiliated with a restaurant. A lot of companies changed that type of policy during the pandemic, although I haven’t gone back and tried since this started.” “Former server here. It’s romano, not parmesan. Olive garden, (or Darden, I should say), is far too cheap to shell out the $ for all of that parmesan cheese.” @earlypete The great Olive Garden Cheese-spiracy #cheese #italianfood #learnontiktok #exposed ♬ Che La Luna – Louis Prima People react to Olive Garden’s cheese In another video on Olive Garden’s Parmesan vs. Romano trade secret, TikToker @earlypete and his followers shared their serious (and funny) thoughts on the matter: “But…they told me that I was family… Why would they lie ” “If the customers can’t tell the difference, they shouldn’t feel jaded.” “I never really understood the difference between these two.” “I prefer Romano, so I’m glad that’s what they serve tbh.” “It’s free cheese. Who is complaining about free cheese?” “ALSO romano melts better.” “I used to do tours for students in Parma the main difference is parm is certified and has strict rules as to what cheese can be called parm.” “how could they do this to us? but really most of us will settle for kraft Parm so really not that upset.” “Finally, I always wondered why the parm I bought tasted nothing like olive gardens cheese.” The post People are shocked to learn the cheese grated freely at Olive Garden isn’t actually Parmesan appeared first on Upworthy.

In the winter of 2021, Mike Coffman dressed as a homeless veteran and spent seven days and nights living on the streets of Aurora, Colorado. Coffman is a U.S. Army veteran, a Marine, a former state treasurer, a former secretary of state, a former representative to Congress, and the current mayor of Aurora. His week as “Homeless Mike” was a way for him to learn about homelessness among the people he serves. That week, he slept in shelters and encampments, covered with a tarp as temperatures dipped into the teens. “It wasn’t fun. It was really hard … but incredibly impactful,” he told CBS4 News. “I never want to do it again.” Founding the shelter he now sleeps in once a week His experience on the street led the mayor to help found the non-profit Advanced Pathways. The incentive-based program includes a 600-person transitional housing facility set up in a former Crowne Plaza hotel, now known as Aurora Regional Navigation Campus (ARNC). When the facililty opened in November of 2025, the idea was that people could advance through a structured program in three tiers. The first tier is a basic-needs shelter for people just off the streets. Tier II offers semi-private rooms for those utilizing addiction recovery programs, mental health services, and job training. Tier III provides individual rooms as transitional housing for those holding down full-time jobs. The goal is to help people achieve the highest level of self-sufficiency they are capable of reaching. The ARNC rollout was rocky, however, with sewage and plumbing issues and complaints about the facility not being ready. The organizers acknowledged the issues and have worked to get the facility to where they want it to be. And 71-year-old Mayor Coffman has put his body where his mouth is again, quietly sleeping in the Tier 1 shelter every Friday night and serving breakfast every Saturday morning since February. Getting a first-hand picture of the complex challenges of homelessness Aurora mayor Mike Coffman sleeping on a cot at a homeless shelter. Image credit: Mike Coffman/Facebook Coffman wrote on Facebook about how staying at the shelter has affected him: “Every Friday afternoon, I leave my office for the ARNC where I meet with the men and women who are staying in Tier I. I stay overnight in the men’s’ congregate shelter sleeping on a cot. In the morning, I help set up and serve breakfast to everyone in Tier I. “The experience has enabled me to better understand their unique and complex challenges and it has helped me to see them with compassion, as individuals, and not through a lens of condescension or contempt. “Consistency is important so that they know that I will be there every Friday and as I’ve become more familiar to them, they have become more relaxed and open about talking to me about their challenges and expectations for their future.” Coffman explained that the goal is to get those folks to Tier II, and eventually to Tier III. As of now, Tier III won’t be available until the fall due to scheduled maintenance requirements. “I will continue to stay with those experiencing homelessness, every Friday night, until the program is everything that I believe that it can be and it is a model, not just for Colorado, but for the country,” Coffman wrote. Earning respect from people of all political persuasions View this post on Instagram The photo of Coffman in his Facebook post was taken just before lights out at 10:00pm and sent to him by someone from the shelter. (Coffman shared that he hands out his business cards to those in Tier I so they can contact him if they need something during the week.) He’d brought ear protection because of construction noise, but they were uncomfortable to sleep in. He just adjusted to the noise. People in the comments, even those who don’t share all of Coffman’s political views, praised the mayor for walking the talk: “I have disagreed with you a lot of the years. And I imagine we would disagree on plenty today. But Mayor Coffman, I have a new level of appreciation and admiration for you. When we take the time to see the world from another persons vantage point, there is always something valuable to learn and take into the next human interaction. Well done.” “I think anyone actively working to understand others is moving along the right path. You can pretend to care, but you can’t pretend to show up.” “I’ll disagree with your politics all day long, but have no problem admiring your tendency to be a decent man.” “I cannot even begin to tell you what this means to me… A TRUE LEADER… I stay out of politics most of the time, but this kind of engagement is what is needed on many levels. Until somebody truly understands what it’s like to walk through the beginning phases of Recovery, it truly is hard to navigate how to help… THANK YOU.” Solving a complex problem like homelessness requires understanding, and seeing a politician show up to learn about it first-hand, not just pay it lip service, certainly hits differently. The post Colorado mayor reveals he’s slept at a homeless shelter one night a week for 4 months appeared first on Upworthy.

InspireMore is excited to announce the Overall Winners of the First Annual Christian Song Contest. After thoughtful review, our panel of judges has selected this year’s Grand Prize Winner, along with the First and Second Place winners in each category. Congratulations to all of our 2025 winners. Your talent, passion, and hard work shine through in every song, and we are proud to celebrate your achievements. Thank you to everyone who entered and shared your music with us. We are honored to hear your creativity, faith, and talent expressed through song. We look forward to hearing even more of your inspiring music in the 2nd Annual Christian Song Contest, which is now open for submissions. This year features exciting new categories, offering even more opportunities for songwriters to showcase their work. Grand Prize Winner: “Yours” By Jessie Villa (Consider The Lillies) Category Winners: Christian Country First Place Winner: “Walk On” By Jonathan Tankersley (Church Friends) Christian Country Second Place Winner: “Dig Down Deep” By Michael Young Christian Hip-Hop/Rap First Place Winner: “Holy Place” By Faith Child Christian Hip-Hop/Rap Second Place Winner: “Love The Child In Me” By Darren Piper (Optikz) Christian Pop First Place Winner: “St. Anthony” By Mateo Rodriguez (MATEO) Christian Pop Second Place Winner: “Blessing In Disguise” By Angela Morano Christian Rock First Place Winner: “Bones” By Emmaline Pennell (PENNELL) Christian Rock Second Place Winner: “Waterwalker” By Christian Moore (Light The Way) CCM First Place Winner: “Your Story’s Not Over Yet” By Jessica Cate (Layla Capri) CCM Second Place Winner: “He Loves You” By Ethan Koch (Psalms Of David) Gospel First Place Winner: “Sweeter” By Aaron McClain (JesusCo Live Worship) Gospel Second Place Winner: “Taste & See” By Joseph Spencer (J. Spence & The Sound) Worship/Inspirational First Place Winner: “Victory” By Danny Alcorn Worship/Inspirational Second Place Winner: “Lavish” By Trey Hill (Revive Worship) Lyric First Place Winner: “Every Word I Say” By Krystal Adcock I wake up with yesterday on my mind,Words I wish I could go back and rewrite.My tongue runs faster than my heart can pray,God, I need Your mercy in the things I say. I don’t want to hurt when I mean to heal,I just want my words to show what’s real. So put Your Spirit in my silence,Calm the noise inside my head.Filter every thought through kindness,Let me speak like You instead.Every word I say, let it carry grace,Every word I say, let it lift Your name. I’ve seen the damage careless moments bring,Shadows hanging on the simplest things.But Your voice is gentle, steady, true,And I want my voice to sound like You. I don’t want to scatter when You’ve called me to sow,I don’t want to wound when You’re teaching me hope. So put Your Spirit in my silence,Calm the noise inside my head.Filter every thought through kindness,Let me speak like You instead.Every word I say, let it carry grace,Every word I say, let it lift Your name. Every word I say…Let it sound like praise.Every word I say…Be for You always. Lyric Second Place Winner: “Pieces in Your Peace” By Shaylee O’Neill I just wanna be sad for a minuteNot ready to find what’s good in itA silver lining’s fineBut now is not the timeIs that alright? I just want to be mad for a secondDon’t wanna hear “calm down and forget it”Anger has a placeand I just need some spaceIs that okay? I’m in pieces In your peaceIf that’s alright with youThen that’s alright with me too I just want to be scared for a whileThe world is big and I’m just a childI’ll call on your nameBut first can I just sayThat I’m afraid? I’m in pieces In your peaceYou don’t hurry me through the harder thingsI’m in pieces In your peaceIf that’s alright with youThen that’s alright with me too I’ve heard it all before“It will all work out, I’m sure”“Just hold on, there’s still a plan”“If it’s not good it’s not the end”While I trust their good intentSometimes silence is a friendThey’re not wrong, it’s just the timingCan’t they see I’m not done crying? I’m in pieces In your peaceyou don’t hurry methrough the harder thingsI’m in pieces In your peaceIf that’s alright with youThen that’s alright with me too Enter the 2nd Annual 2026 Christian Song Contest Today!