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20-year-old woman agreed to a closed adoption for her baby, then got a wonderful surprise
At Upworthy, we love sharing the “best of humanity” with our audience, and this story out of Utah, originally reported by CBS News’ Steve Hartman, shows the power of love to break down barriers.
When Schauna Austin was 20 years old, she got pregnant and knew she wasn’t ready to raise a child, so she made the difficult decision to give the baby up for adoption.
She gave birth to a son she named Riley and only had three days to spend with him before surrendering him to his new family. So, she held him tight for 72 hours straight.
“It was perfect,” Austin said about those three emotionally-charged days. “I knew I would have him for a short time, so I made every minute count of it. I didn’t sleep for three days.” It must have been tough for Austin to give up her son because the grieving process of surrender and adoption can be incredibly difficult.
The beginning of an unlikely journey
Riley was placed with Chris and Jennifer Schoebinger through a closed adoption, and they decided to rename him Steven.
In a closed adoption, the birth mother, Austin, would not receive any information about the adoptive family. In Utah, closed adoptions are a rarity these days, with about 95% allowing some exchange of information between the birth and adoptive parents. Usually, the birth parents have a good deal of input over whether they prefer to have regular contact or not with the adoptive family.
However, about a week later, the Schoebingers made a major decision.
The Schoebingers decided Austin should be involved in Steven’s life. They wanted to officially open the closed adoption.
You can imagine that it’s a big and potentially risky decision for adoptive parents to bring in a birth parent. It could complicate things, stir up difficult feelings, or even bring conflict into their lives. But the Schoebingers weren’t worried about any of that.
“It was like, ‘OK, this is the way it should be. She was part of our family,'” Jennifer told CBS News.
“You know, you can’t have too many people loving you, right? Why couldn’t he be both of ours?” Chris added.
A life documented in books and photos
Every year, the Schoebingers sent Austin pictures and bound journals showing Steven’s journey in deep detail. They even had lists of all the new words he learned each year. The books were titled “The Life and Times of ‘Riley,’” paying homage to Steven’s original name.
The Schoebingers sent Steven’s mother photos every year until the two were ready to meet. Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash
The hope was that one day when the biological mother and son were ready, they could pick up where they left off. That moment came when Steven was seven years old and his biological mother taught him to fish. The unique arrangement has been fantastic for both Austin and her biological son. “I was blessed beyond words,” Austin said. “I kind of got the best of both worlds, for sure,” Steven agreed. It may seem like relationships between children and those who gave them up for adoption would be complicated, but studies show that 84% of adoptees reported high levels of satisfaction when maintaining ongoing contact with their birth parents. It’s considered the standard these days unless there are specific reasons why it’s in the best interest of the child to have the adoption be closed.
Steven is now 28 and in August 2022, he and his wife, Kayla, had their first child, a boy they named…wait for it…Riley. Austin, herself, is now a grandmother.
He’s heeere!!! ? Our first grandchild. Welcome, Riley. You don’t know me yet, but our home will always be your home. No matter what life throws your way, you will be loved and accepted and we’ll eat pie! And ice cream. And you’ll wonder if that’s the only thing grandpa eats? ? pic.twitter.com/7ac8A0GVKI— Chris Schoebinger (@PUBGUY) August 19, 2022
The remarkable story of Austin and the Schoebinger family proves that when we put walls between ourselves and others, we are often blocking everyone off from more love and support.
It’s Father’s Day. And as a father, I’m excited for my son to soon be a new father. Still strange to think I’ll be a grandfather. But I’m really looking forward to it. pic.twitter.com/0RZlD8cwP7— Chris Schoebinger (@PUBGUY) June 19, 2022
The emotional response to their story
People on social media were incredibly moved by the story. Dozens of commenters chimed in on YouTube to express their gratitude for the families involved:
“Steven’s adoptive parents are WONDERFUL! They weren’t selfish, and did what was best for STEVEN, His dad said it best—–the more love a child has, the better. His bio mom lucked out with this special couple as well, especially when they sent her the books each year! This story was ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL!!” one user wrote.
“Speaks volumes of his adoptive parents and also the love of his natural mother to make the hardest decision on earth,” another said.
“Thank you for including the birth mom in the raising of your son. I’m adopted and it was a closed one. the struggle of not knowing your birth parents is real. I just spent my first Christmas in 56 years with my Ukrainian birth family. Full circle family is love. Oh what a ride!” someone added.
Ultimately, Chris Schoebinger, the adoptive dad, said it best:
“I think the lesson we learned is that sometimes we create barriers where barriers don’t need to be. And when we pull down those barriers, we really find love on the other side,” Chris said.
This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.The post 20-year-old woman agreed to a closed adoption for her baby, then got a wonderful surprise appeared first on Upworthy.