Picky eaters are a huge challenge for many parents, even though it’s considered a normal developmental stage. Harvard Health Publishing writes that young children being picky about food is one way they learn to assert their independence, for example. Even though it’s extremely common and normal, experts also recommend that parents start early to break picky eating habits; once those habits get locked into place, they’re even tougher to break. Which is just one more thing for overloaded parents to worry about when planning meals is already difficult enough. One well-qualified mom demonstrates her thoughtful technique for getting picky eaters to “eat anything” Fitness coach Mel Avan, who has taught university-level health, wellness, and nutrition courses, has developed a method. It involves a lot of trial and error while raising a picky eater of her very own. Picky eating is a challenge as old as parenting itself. Photo credit: Canva In a video posted to YouTube, she not only explains the technique, but also demonstrates it in real time as she attempts to feed her skeptical son a noodle. It starts with creating a little scarcity. She’s not overly animated about it, but she subtly creates the mystique that the pasta is something of a treat. “Come try this,” she says. “You can only have one piece.” Then, she stays completely neutral. She doesn’t hype up how good it is or rave about how healthy it might be. Her son says it looks like a noodle. She agrees stoically. “It is a noodle.” Then she, in her words, shuts up. “I let him lead the interaction. I ask questions, but I don’t share my opinion or give praise.” Not even to applaud him for being willing to try it. Finally, she waits. Sure enough, a few minutes later, her son announces he’s hungry and that he “wants the pasta.” Mission accomplished. She elaborates in the caption that the entire thing hinges on decreasing pressure. A small portion lowers pressure. A neutral tone lowers pressure. A slow pace lowers pressure. And allowing the child to come to you when they want more makes it their idea to eat the food, rather than a way of appeasing you. Again, pressure. Mom gets challenged to repeat the demonstration under more difficult circumstances While the video went viral to the tune of more than a million views, and many viewers loved the technique on display, not everyone was satisfied. This being the Internet, it was only a matter of time before Avan got called out and challenged: A noodle? Really? Try a piece of broccoli or some spinach. She accepted the challenge and, in a follow-up video on Instagram, introduced a few new techniques for more challenging foods that still fit within her core philosophy. First, she introduces an element of choice. “Do you want me to serve your vegetables, or do you want to do it with the tongs?” Next, and once again, tiny portions. A heaping pile of something they’re skeptical about eating only makes the task more overwhelming. Then there’s one of her more unique tactics: serving food family-style. In this case, she made her son a plate with a small amount of veggies, but also offered the entire tray at the table, where he could easily grab more with a “fun utensil.” It’s a way of giving him control. And finally, finding even more opportunities for autonomy and control. Since picky eating is often about independence, she lets her son control things that aren’t as important, like where the ketchup goes on his plate. Mom, and experts, weigh in on “Eat what I made or don’t eat” In another follow-up video, Avan responds to comments suggesting that she was doing too much coddling and manipulating. Instead, some old-school parents favor the “Either you eat what I made, or you don’t eat” approach. Avan says that, in her personal experience, this approach backfired spectacularly. When kids don’t eat, not only is it unsafe and unhealthy, but you’ll also run into a host of behavior problems as they get crankier. At least one study has found that putting pressure on children to eat, or to eat more, can actually have the opposite effect: “Children consumed significantly more food when they were not pressured to eat and they made overwhelmingly fewer negative comments.” And if things aren’t going well, research cited by Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia says you shouldn’t give up: It can take eight to 15 exposures to a new food before a child will willingly accept it. The old-school parents of yesteryear got a lot more right than we’re often willing to give them credit for. However, our understanding of child psychology has grown by leaps and bounds, and clinically validated research can teach us a lot about how to handle challenges like picky eating. Lowering pressure instead of increasing it, and remaining neutral rather than excited or angry, is far more effective. But in the end, picky eating is normal for young kids, and as long as you make a solid effort, most eventually grow out of the phase. The post Nutrition expert demonstrates foolproof method to get her picky kids to ‘eat anything’ appeared first on Upworthy.

A woman who uses the Instagram handle Hope with Holly often makes videos in which she imparts wisdom from her own experiences. She’s candid in her discussions about feminism, marriage, divorce, finding courage, and much more. So when her daughter turned 19, it seemed like the perfect time to share 19 pieces of advice for a better life. In a Reel dedicated to her daughter, she lays it all out with precision and love. Casually putting her hair in a ponytail while slicing a watermelon—and later placing strawberries on a white-frosted birthday cake—she looks straight into the camera and declares, “This is what all women should know by the time they turn 19.” View this post on Instagram You are not here to be chosen. You are here to choose.“And if you build your life around being picked, then you will tolerate things that you should walk away from.” Your ability to earn money will determine your freedom.“Love matters. But money determines if you can leave if it turns unhealthy.” Attraction is not a sign of safety.“Your nervous system can be drawn to chaos. It’s not a sign of safety. Know the difference.” A man’s potential is irrelevant. His patterns are everything.“Only patterns matter. Patterns are who he is.” Chemistry can lie. Character doesn’t.“Butterflies are often anxiety. And peace often feels like boredom. But it’s what lasts.” If he can’t regulate his emotions, he will regulate them through you.“That means control, blame, withdrawal, anger, or defensiveness. Don’t let that happen.” You cannot love someone into being healthy.“Love does not fix trauma. Only therapy, accountability, and effort do.” Marriage will not fix a relationship.“It will amplify whatever’s there, whether it’s good or bad.” Children will expose a relationship, not save it.“They do not bring you closer. They just expose what’s already broken…or strong.” Your standards will cost you relationships—and that’s the point. Loneliness is not an emergency.“Rushing to fill it is how you end up in the wrong life.” A man who wants you will pursue you with clarity.“If you feel confused about him, that’s your answer. Walk away.” Sex is not a currency for love.“Instead, it’s the byproduct of a healthy relationship—and an emotionally safe relationship.” Your body will change. Your value does not.“Anyone who ties your worth to your youth is not a safe person.” Pay attention to how he handles the word “no.”“That will tell you everything you need to know about him.” You teach people how to treat you by what you tolerate.“Boundaries are not words. They’re decisions. Enforce them.” Healing is your responsibility.“What happened to you was not your fault. But what you allow to continue is your responsibility.” Build a life that you do not need to escape from.“Then choose a partner who enhances it.” You are allowed to want more.“More respect. More peace. Settling is not maturity. It’s just fear dressed up as acceptance.” View this post on Instagram She adds, “Now I don’t need you to be perfect, girl. But I do need you to be powerful enough to walk away from anything that’s not perfect for you. Happy birthday, honey!” The comment section is filled with support, especially from people who say they wish they’d learned these lessons earlier. “I can only imagine how different my life would have looked had I heard this narrative by 19. Learning all this by 39. Better late than never. Thanks, mama.” Some are also highly focused on her decorating and baking skills: “Now let me watch this again but this time without getting highly distracted by all the layers of that awesome fruit tower.” And one 19-year-old was especially grateful, writing, “I turned 19 two months ago, seeing every woman wishing they heard these when they were younger, I would like thank you so much that you reached me in the right time Happy birthday to your daughter and wishing your family the best ” View this post on Instagram The post Mom shares 19 gems of knowledge for her daughter’s 19th birthday appeared first on Upworthy.

Russian author Fyodor Dostoevsky’s works are known for their deep psychological and philosophical themes. His writing offered insights on topics ranging from what it means to live a meaningful life to the meaning of life itself. According to Dostoevsky, an essential part of leading an authentic life involves avoiding self-deception and resisting the urge to run from pain. Staying true to oneself can lead to a fulfilling life rooted in personal freedom, though not without suffering. Dostoevsky’s personal experiences helped shape the insights he shared in his novel The Brothers Karamazov. In it, he offered powerful advice to anyone pursuing an authentic life. Dostoevsky on living an authentic life Dostoevsky believed that to live an authentic life, one must be honest with oneself and endure suffering. He wrote: “Above all, don’t lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect for anyone or anything he ceases to love.“ Dostoevsky also wrote: “To be a human being among human beings, and remain one forever, no matter what misfortunes befall, not to become depressed, and not to falter–this is what life is, herein lies its task.” Dostoevsky faced many trials in his life (1821–1881). One of the most notable was being sent to a prison labor camp in Siberia for his political beliefs. After eight months, he was sentenced to death by firing squad. But the execution was staged for dramatic effect. According to Encyclopaedia Britannica: “There a sentence of death by firing squad was pronounced, last rites were offered, and three prisoners were led out to be shot first. At the last possible moment, the guns were lowered and a messenger arrived with the information that the tsar had deigned to spare their lives. The mock-execution ceremony was in fact part of the punishment.” His life was not free from pain or mistakes, and from 1864 to 1865, “his wife and his brother died, the magazine folded, and Dostoevsky found himself deeply in debt, which he exacerbated by gambling.” Tips for living an authentic life In The Atlantic, Arthur C. Brooks, a Harvard University social scientist and author, broke down five principles for living a fulfilling, authentic life based on Dostoevsky’s writing: 1. The journey is the destination Brooks explains that Dostoevsky believed an authentic life required embracing the daily pursuit of purpose, with all the good and bad that comes with it. “Happiness requires purpose; purpose requires a sense of direction; a sense of direction requires goal-setting—but happiness cannot be had by realizing those goals,” he wrote. 2. Embrace freedom Brooks highlighted Dostoevsky’s belief that being free and fully experiencing humanity also comes with suffering. “To be alive is to embrace freedom, even when it was painful,” he shared. 3. Beware the Palace of Crystal Brooks refers to Dostoevsky’s novel Notes from Underground. In it, the Palace of Crystal represents a utopia free from hardship and pain—but one that is ultimately an empty existence. “Facing the anguish of being fully alive out in the real world is much better than languishing, tranquilized, in the palace of crystal,” he wrote. View this post on Instagram 4. The pain is the point Although muting, avoiding, or dismissing pain are all ways humans may choose to cope, they went against Dostoevsky’s beliefs. “Even if he could make it stop, he says, he wouldn’t—because that kind of suffering is the inevitable and necessary cost of realizing what we all truly seek in life: love,” Brooks wrote. 5. Look up The question of faith was something Dostoevsky, a Russian Orthodox Christian, struggled with. “Belief is a question of commitment, Dostoyevsky thought, not emotion or reason,” Brooks shared. He also quoted Dostoevsky’s journal about his spiritual battle, where he wrote: “I believe in Christ and confess him not like some child; my hosanna has passed through an enormous furnace of doubt.” The post Fyodor Dostoevsky shared one powerful habit necessary to lead an authentic life appeared first on Upworthy.

On July 4, the United States of America will celebrate its 250th birthday. Called the “semiquincentennial,” the day will commemorate 250 years since the Declaration of Independence was signed. Of course, English was spoken by colonial Americans, and they had a distinctive accent that was unique to the newly formed country. Surprisingly, they did not sound British. That’s because by the time of the Revolutionary War, two new generations had been born on American soil, according to JSTOR. British English and American English began to develop separately. An English tourist commented on the colonial American dialect in 1770: “The colonists are composed of adventurers, not only from every district of Great Britain and Ireland, but from almost every other European government…Is it not therefore reasonable to suppose that the English language must be greatly corrupted by such a strange admixture of various nations? The reverse is however true. The language of the immediate descendants of such promiscuous ancestry is perfectly uniform, and unadulterated; nor has it borrowed any provincial, or national accent from its British or foreign parentage.” 9 interesting Colonial American words Many words from colonial America have faded from the modern-day lexicon. But a book from 1785 titled The Vulgar Tongue by author Francis Grose documented slang used during colonial times. The book was reprinted over the years, including an updated version titled 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue. The word “vulgar” had a different meaning than it does today. “Vulgar” meant “common” or “ordinary,” according to Merriam-Webster. Here are nine fascinating colonial-era words to add to your lexicon: Adam’s ale This is another word for water. According to Merriam-Webster, its origins are “after the biblical Adam; from its being provided by nature and thus presumably being the only drink in the Garden of Eden.” The term’s first known use was in 1643. Altitudes This is another word for drunk. According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “the man is in his altitudes, i.e. he is drunk.” Arsy yarsey According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “to fall arsy varsey, i.e. head over heels.” Merriam-Webster defines it as “backside forward; head over heels; topsy-turvy.” It goes on to add that the word is “a non-reduplicative (yet still very cheeky) equivalent of arsy-varsy would be the expression ass over teakettle. However, arsy-varsy may be used as both adverb (modifying an action, as in the first example below) or an adjective (modifying a noun, as in the second) meaning ‘topsy-turvy’ or ‘disordered.’” Calibogus Surprisingly, this is the name of a colonial drink. According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “rum and spruce beer, American beverage.” It may also have been sweetened with molasses, according to Merriam-Webster. Carroty-pated This is another word for a redhead. According to the Collins Dictionary, “carroty” means “a reddish or yellowish-orange colour; having red hair.” The word “pated” means “having a (specified kind of) pate, or head.” Caudge-pawed This is another word for left-handed, according to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue. Flam According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “a lie, or sham story: also a single stroke on a drum. To flam; to hum, to amuse, to deceive. Flim flams; idle stories.” While it was used in colonial times, its history dates further back. Merriam-Webster explains: “‘Flimflam’ first entered English as a noun meaning ‘deceptive nonsense’ in the second half of the 16th century. A sense meaning ‘deception’ or ‘fraud’ soon developed. The verb use didn’t show up until well into the next century. In addition to general deceiving or tricking, the verb ‘flimflam’ is often used specifically to refer to swindling someone out of money. The ultimate origin of ‘flimflam’ is uncertain, but the word is probably of Scandinavian origin and may be related to the Old Norse flim, meaning ‘mockery’.” Huzza This celebratory word was chanted during colonial times. According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “said to have been originally the cry of the huzzars or Hungarian light horse; but now the national shout of the English, both civil and military, in the sea phrase termed a cheer; to give three cheers being to huzza thrice.” American colonists also adopted the word. According to Dr. Tyler Putman at the Museum of the American Revolution, it also had a surprising pronunciation: hu-ZAY (like “hooray”), not hu-ZAH (like “hoorah”). Oyster This word had a second meaning besides the shellfish. According to the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue, it means “a gob of thick phlegm, spit by a consumptive man; in law Latin, UNUM [one] VIRIDUM [green] GOBBUM [lump or mass].” The post 9 fascinating Colonial-era words to brush up on for America’s 250th birthday appeared first on Upworthy.

Dawn Zuidgeest-Craft always wanted to be a doctor, but life seemed to have other plans for her. During her younger years, Dawn finished her undergraduate degree and eventually became a neonatal nurse practitioner. She explained in an essay for the Boston Globe that, after her divorce at 35, she applied to medical school but was denied admission. Dawn married for the second time and had two more children, her youngest born when she was 49. Although her career and motherhood fulfilled her, her desire to attend medical school remained. Dawn Zuidgeest-Craft Enrolled in Medical School When her husband suffered a medical emergency, she took that as a sign. In her late 60s, Dawn decided to take the leap. According to the Washington Post, Dawn Zuidgeest-Craft used savings earmarked for her retirement to attend a medical school in the Caribbean. She’ll begin her residency at a Michigan hospital in July. Meteorologist Ginger Zee isn’t just Dawn Zuidgeest-Craft’s daughter; she’s also her biggest fan. She told Entertainment Tonight her mother’s conviction makes her proud every single day. “I always say with tornadoes and meteorology, that when you go to school for it, it’s one thing, but when you storm chase, it’s another,” she said. “That’s how you learn how to be a great meteorologist. Ginger added that because her mom has such an extensive medical background, this will be perfect for her. “And I always use the analogy that if you had a doctor who had never worked on a patient before, you wouldn’t want that doctor, if they were only from a textbook,” she added. “She already had 45 years of being in the hospital setting.” Dawn Zuidgeest-Craft can’t wait to get started. “When you have to do it for work … you feel like, ‘I got to do this so that I can pay my rent,’” Dawn told the Washington Post. “I want to do this because I really enjoy this.” This story’s featured image can be found here