The saying, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do,” has been around since ancient times and is still a good reminder that customs and habits vary wherever you go. One of the best things about traveling to another part of the world is discovering how things you think are normal or standard are not universally so, and seeing how different cultures function broadens your ideas of the human experience. That’s why a woman from Denmark explaining “normal” things that are considered rude in Nordic countries has caught people’s attention. People are often fascinated with Denmark, Finland, Sweden, and Norway, largely because they regularly top lists of “happiest countries in the world” (which is always a little surprising considering the weather in that part of the world alone). Here are the 13 behaviors and habits Kelly Louise Killjoy says Nordic countries consider rude in her experience: Here are all 13, in her experience 1. Being late to anything Of course, being late is rude in a lot of places, so this one may not be surprising, but punctuality is a culturally specific expectation. There are places where it would be considered rude to show up early, and other places where “fashionably late” doesn’t exist. In Killjoy’s experience, Nordic folks like to be as close to exactly on time as possible. “Like five minutes early or five minutes late, no more, no less,” she says. “Preferably exactly on time.” And they will often apologize for even being one minute late. 2. Showing up unannounced Some countries have a distinct “dropping by” culture, but the Nordic nations aren’t among them. Even close friends and family call or text before arriving at someone’s house, as it’s considered rude to just show up. “With Nordic people, it’s all about respecting our time,” Killjoy says. “We often plan our time very carefully, according to when we’re meeting you. And these meetups are often scheduled weeks or months beforehand. So the door may be open, but it doesn’t mean the schedule is.” 3. Canceling plans last minute “Unless you have a serious reason, this is more rude than saying no up front because you don’t feel like it,” Killjoy says. “Again, Nordic people plan their time around you for weeks, if not months, so respect our time and we will love you for it.” Woman disappointed by last minute cancelled plans. Photo credit: Canva 4. Speaking to people without a practical purpose Even though not everyone loves it, small talk is considered normal in American culture. Not so much in Scandinavia. If you’re just running errands or going through your normal daily life activities in Nordic countries, people don’t just shoot the breeze with you. “If you talk to us, we will assume there’s a reason, otherwise we get confused and awkward,” Killjoy says. “If you’ve ever had a conversation with a Nordic person where you thought, ‘Why didn’t they like me?’ or ‘This got awkward very quickly,’ it’s because that Nordic person was more than likely trying to figure out what you wanted out of that conversation.” 5. Being overly polite Killjoy says this is another area where Americans and Nordic people often misunderstand each other. The idea of politeness being rude even sounds like an oxymoron, but for Nordic folks, it’s really about being asked questions you don’t want to give real answers to. The example Killjoy gives is asking people, “How are you?” That’s standard for Americans, and it’s understood that you’re not asking someone to spill all of their emotions in the moment. But Nordic folks take questions at face value, so it feels personal and invasive. A few that Americans might recognize 6. Speaking loudly in public places One thing that people sometimes pinpoint with Americans visiting other countries is that we tend to speak loudly. In a public place like a restaurant, where lots of people are talking, it’s not really much of a consideration for us. But it is for Nordic folks (and a lot of other European countries, Killjoy points out). 7. Sitting next to someone when you don’t have to “This is a classic Nordic meme, but it’s true,” Killjoy says. “We do not like people sitting next to us when we can see there’s space around for them to divide themselves upon.” If you sit next to a Nordic person on a mostly empty bus, they’ll think something is wrong with you or that you might wish them harm. (To be fair, this is likely true most places. But there are some friendly folks who like to chat with strangers and will take the opportunity when they see it.) Sitting closer than necessary to someone is rude. Photo credit: Canva 8. Using formal titles “Unless you’re addressing the king or queen, don’t,” says Killjoy. Although titles like “Mr.” or “Mrs.” or “Dr.” are used to show respect in a lot of places, Nordic folks tend to see them as impersonal and distant. “Even doctors and teachers will think it’s weird if you use formal titles with them,” she says. 9. Bragging “This ties into the people being loud part as well,” Killjoy says. “Nordic culture is a very conflict-avoidant and don’t-stand-outish kind of culture.” She says there’s even a Danish word for this social norm that heavily discourages standing out and favors humility and equality: Janteloven. “Bragging just goes heavily against that,” Killjoy says. 10. Tipping “Tipping cultures are very awkward to Nordic people,” says Killjoy. “Like, I don’t understand why you can’t just pay your employees.” (Same, honestly.) A rant: Tipping culture is out of control. I'm a generous tipper. But 20% for someone to make eye contact & hand me a muffin is crazy. Restaurants widely suggesting people tip 30% now is kookoo bananas. At this rate we'll soon be tipping the price of the meal. Make it stop.— Billy Binion (@billybinion) July 17, 2025 And some that might catch you off guard 11. Not taking off your shoes in someone’s home This one is more of a household-by-household preference in the U.S., it seems, but in Scandinavia, it’s the norm to take off your shoes in the house. Most Nordic homes have mudrooms for this very purpose. 12. Honking your car horn Go to any major U.S. city, and you’ll hear no shortage of car horns. Killjoy says in Denmark it’s illegal to honk your car horn for any other reason than as a danger warning or if someone hasn’t seen you. “If you honk, someone will assume there’s something wrong,” she says, so don’t honk there out of impatience. 13. Jaywalking Killjoy calls jaywalking “kind of rude,” primarily because Nordic folks tend to be rule-followers. It’s not that they will never jaywalk, but generally, they only do it when no one is really around or would notice. Of course, these “considered rude” behaviors are coming from one person, and some commenters from Nordic countries added some clarifications in the comments (such as the “no dropping by” rule being something newer or more specific to urban than rural areas). But many fellow Scandinavians corroborated the things on this list. It’s good to know, though, what people from one of these countries might find rude when you meet them. And if you ever find yourself in Denmark? Do as the Danes do. This article originally appeared in January. It has been updated. The post Woman from Denmark shares ‘normal’ things that are considered rude in Nordic countries appeared first on Upworthy.

One couple, one toilet, one digestive emergency, and a half-finished shower. For anyone who values poop-time privacy, it’s hard to imagine a more awkward combo. Someone recently shared how they handled that exact scenario, sparking an online debate about bathroom decorum and, by extension, whether couples should be comfortable pooping in each other’s company. In a viral thread on Reddit, the OP said they arrived home and told their boyfriend they were taking a “quick shower.” But as soon as they started shampooing, their partner walked in and announced an urgent poop emergency. “I respond ‘Dude, no. I’ll just close the shower curtain and you can go,'” they replied. “To which he responds ‘Are you serious?!? You gotta get out!’ To which I’m like, ‘Dude, are YOU seriously asking me to get out of the shower right now?'” The context here is crucial. The Redditor said they’ve lived together for more than two years and are “pretty [comfortable] with each other but definitely not to the point of pooping in front of each other.” Their boyfriend has IBS, so bathroom urgency is a serious issue for him: “When he’s gotta go, he’s gotta go.” But the OP noted that their home is very cold and heated with a wood stove. “I hadn’t gotten the fire going yet so was just standing freezing and dripping and shampoo-haired outside the bathroom waiting for him to s—,” they added. “This is obviously not THAT big of a deal but like…am I crazy thinking that it’s a wild ask to make ur partner leave mid shower so you can take a dump?” Most people sided with the boyfriend The post went viral, and many comments appeared to side with the boyfriend, citing general privacy concerns as well as his IBS. “Ngl I wouldn’t want to be in the shower while someone was actively s—-ing in the same room, but maybe that’s me.” “op even said he has IBS. Bro is fighting demons in there” “I have [Crohn’s]. If my wife had to vacate the shower every time I unexpectedly needed the toilet, she’d be shaving her head.” “Sometimes when I s— I don’t even want to be in there” “I’ve been married over 20 years and we still give each other privacy to poop. Multiple bathrooms do help. IBS adds a whole level of complexity to this scenario. It’s urgent, and often very unpleasant both in sound/smell and he’s probably embarrassed enough by it as it is. This was a case of really bad timing. If it happens again, rinse out the shampoo and get out ASAP – although you’re majorly inconvenienced, he’s got an actual emergency.” “I am not leaving that water till the shampoo is rinsed and conditioner is applied and rinsed. Period.” Not everyone saw it that way But there were plenty of other perspectives. “This is so weird to me. I don’t share a bathroom while my husband s—s if I can reasonably avoid it, but if I’ve just put in shampoo and he’s got to GO, then we’re just going to have to handle business at the same time. I’m not leaving the bathroom soapy and cold because he can’t poop with an audience. It’s just f—ing bodily functions, I’m not that precious and neither is he. IBS wouldn’t change that. It’s not ideal, but he’d never ask me to be physically uncomfortable because he was emotionally uncomfortable. Edit: to be clear, I’ll rush the shower. Skip shaving and other unnecessary steps. Shorten the post shower routine or fully push it back. But I am not leaving that water till the shampoo is rinsed and conditioner is applied and rinsed. Period.” “Completely wild. As much as I gotta poop (also in same boat with the IBS) if I’m kicking everyone out every time I do, nothing would ever get done. Nobody else can shower or use the shower to pee or my ol lady would never be able to get ready for work. Thats insane IMO.” “I had an ex with IBS, it was bad. But I know how to just not use my nose in horribly smelly situations. I’d rush, for his comfort, but I wouldn’t bail, covered in soap.” “IBS emergencies are real and when someone says they have to go, they usually mean right now. That said, asking someone to step out of the shower soaking wet in a freezing house is also pretty rough and understandably frustrating.” “I’m 12 years in and have never once done that with my husband in the room or vice versa.” Then the conversation went somewhere else Naturally, some comments diverged from the original story and focused more on the idea of pooping in the same room as your partner. “Honestly I’m more fascinated by how many spouses poop in front of each other. I’m 12 years in and have never once done that with my husband in the room or vice versa. I didn’t realise it was such a common thing!” “I’m surprised how many people are appalled by the idea we have full blown conversations while pooping daily. If it’s especially stinky I’ll vacate, but otherwise it’s not a big deal at all.” “I dump in front of my husband all the time lol. And vice versa. Just turn on the fan. Oh and we have three bathrooms haha!” What this debate is really about Strip away the shower curtain and the shampoo and the IBS, and what people are actually debating here is where the line is between intimacy and privacy in a long-term relationship. Some couples reach a point where bodily functions are just facts of life, no different from snoring or leaving dishes in the sink. Others maintain certain boundaries indefinitely, not out of shame, but because some privacy feels like a form of respect. Neither approach is wrong. The real issue isn’t who was right in this particular situation, it’s that they apparently hadn’t figured out where they both stood before the emergency arrived. This article originally appeared in January. It has been updated. The post A man’s bathroom emergency forced his partner out of the shower. Cue the online debate. appeared first on Upworthy.

Everyone has that person in their life who casts everything in a negative light. You go out for a great meal, only to hear them complain about the service. They never highlight anyone’s positive qualities, just their faults, and the only joy they seem to get comes from putting down the things you love. It’s like they are programmed to be antagonistic about absolutely everything. The problem is that, whether they’re friends, family members, or co-workers, we’re stuck dealing with people who drain our energy and have a knack for ruining a good time. Fortunately for us, communication expert Jefferson Fisher recently shared a three-step reset method on YouTube for dealing with these impossible people. Fisher, who has become massively popular on social media, offers tips “to help people argue less and talk more.” How to deal with negative people Here is Fisher’s three-step reset method for dealing with negative energy: 1. Don’t absorb the negativity “Don’t absorb what they said,” Fisher says. “Instead, we’re going to call it out. You’re going to say it out loud. That means when you claim it, you control it. Meaning, you control your own reactions to it. That’s the takeaway there.” Examples include: “This feels tense.” “This feels heated.” “I’m sensing some negativity.” 2. Call out the truth, not the tone “When that happens to the negative energy, you’re going to send it right back by having them repeat it,” he says. “How? It’s very similar to how I recommend handling insults. See, they can’t repackage it in the same way again when you ask them to repeat it the same way. They can’t say it the same way. Then they just look terrible.” @arnaldo.sifre Master Negative Energy_ React to Truth, Not Tone Discover the simple but powerful technique Jefferson Fisher uses to stop negative energy without arguing or escalating. Instead of reacting to someone’s tone, you focus on the truth behind their words. The method? Ask them to repeat what they said. Most passive-aggressive people cannot package their negativity the same way twice. When they repeat it, the tone weakens and the truth comes out. If it’s still negative, calmly ask again: “I need you to say that again—better.” This forces clarity, removes hostility, and shifts the power back to you. Stop reacting to tone. Start uncovering truth. Transform every interaction starting today. fyp CommunicationSkills JeffersonFisher ConfidenceTips EmotionalIntelligence StopNegativity PassiveAggressive BetterConversations MindsetMatters HealthyBoundaries LifeSkills SpeakUp PersonalGrowth RelationshipSkills #foryourpage ♬ original sound – Growth Mindset Movement – Growth Mindset Movement 3. Protect your presence “You cannot control another person’s mood,” he adds. “You cannot make somebody happier. That is their choice. … Big takeaway: you are making sure that your mind acknowledges the negative energy, but it neither matches it nor tries to attach to it. That’s the difference. That’s how you handle the negative energy.” Why are some people so negative? A primary reason some people are overwhelmingly negative is that they are extremely fearful and hyperfocus on the negative aspects of life. “In brief, almost all negativity has its roots in one of three deep-seated fears: the fear of being disrespected by others, the fear of not being loved by others, and the fear that ‘bad things’ are going to happen,” Raj Raghunathan, PhD, writes in Psychology Today. Humans also have a negativity bias, which means we’re more primed to respond to negative than positive stimuli. That’s why we remember insults far more often than praise and are more likely to recall negative moments than positive ones. Why all the negativity? It’s a survival technique. People who can detect danger and harmful situations are much more likely to survive than those who focus on the positive. Unfortunately, we sometimes have to make a conscious effort to see the good in the world. How to use this in real life Even though negative people can be a burden to be around, taking Fisher’s advice and refusing to let them affect our presence can turn them into a reminder to reset and refocus on the positive in life. This article originally appeared in January. It has been updated. The post Communication expert shares 3-step reset method for dealing with extremely negative people appeared first on Upworthy.

Americans have unique body language and gestures that set them apart from other countries and cultures. These American quirks, such as pointing and eating while walking are easily picked up by non-Americans who are quickly able to identify us. Besides a certain demeanor, other American indicators include clothing choices like backwards baseball caps and wearing sunglasses on one’s head. According to Jonna Mendez, the Central Intelligence Agency’s (CIA) former Chief of Disguise, there is one specific posture that has been deemed a dead giveaway of an American identity. It’s called the “American Lean.” @magni.fy Only Americans Do This #travel #funfacts #culture #USA #bodylanguage The “American lean” is a cultural quirk where people from the U.S. instinctively lean on walls, railings, doorframes, or furniture when standing in public. It’s casual, relaxed, and often signals comfort in occupying space… but where did it come from? ♬ original sound – magnify – magnify American body language identifiers In a 2019 interview with NPR, Mendez and former Director of the CIA, Gina Haspel, explained more about how American body language differs from European body language. “They wear their wedding rings on different fingers. They eat differently than we do. They don’t shuttle that fork back and forth,” she explained. Haspel also commented on Mendez’s description of the “American Lean,” adding, “They think that we are slouchy, a little sloppy. And they think that they can almost see that in our demeanor on the street because they stand up straight. They don’t lean on things.” Mendez expanded on American appearance and body language during an “Ask Me Anything” interview on Reddit. “More broadly, generalizing (and it is always a little dangerous to generalize) Americans are seen as a bit more casual in their dress on the street than other nationalities. Casual might be too soft a word. Sloppy? Nobody else seems to be wearing sweatpants and shirts on the streets,” she explained. “We are also thought to be loud, for instance you can identify the group of Americans in front of the tourist office by the noise that they make. We are not disparaged everywhere, but we do tend to stand out.” Why Americans do the ‘American Lean’ On Reddit, curious Americans tried to explain their leaning habits. Many offered their opinions: “Idk why it’s an American thing, but I’m American and I lean on things because I feel uncomfortable and awkward all the time and having a third point of grounding (2 feet + shoulder/back) is more comfortable.” – a_sternum “American and I’ve gotta lean on everything because every job I worked was aggressively against us sitting in case the customers saw us comfortable [I guess]? There’s a weird notion that sitting equals lazy.” – pickleruler67 “Not allowed to sit at work so we tend to lean against things. The phrase ‘time to lean, time to clean’ is also very prevalent. We’re not okay btw.” – W3R3Hamster “idk but apparently it’s enough of a thing that my school advised us to not do it while studying abroad so as not to make ourselves targets as tourists/foreigners/Americans .” – uhhwhatamidoing “1) Americans are less formal in most situations, good posture is less emphasized. 2) It’s cool.. think James Dean or fashion models. 3) Laziness.” – No-Oil-1669 How other cultures rest instead Others explained how different cultures “rest” in different positions. “Drive down the street in South Korea and you see folks squatting instead of leaning,” one shared. Another added, “The Slavic squat is an alternative.” So should Americans try to stop leaning? Probably not. The American Lean isn’t really a flaw, it’s a byproduct of a culture that’s casual by default, where standing at ease is more natural than standing at attention. The CIA trains operatives to drop it specifically because it draws attention, but for the rest of us, the bigger takeaway might simply be awareness. Knowing that leaning on a doorframe in Vienna reads differently than leaning on one in Cincinnati is the kind of small thing that can make travel feel a little more intentional. And if you’re not a spy, you can always just lean anyway. James Dean made it look pretty good. This article originally appeared in January. It has been updated. The post The CIA says this one body language gesture is a dead giveaway you are an American appeared first on Upworthy.

The odds of winning the lottery are slim to none. We’ve all heard stories about our friend’s cousin’s neighbor’s boss who won a jackpot. But having someone in your inner circle actually win the lottery is a lot rarer. We have to believe that if our numbers ever came up, we’d be ecstatic and probably even a tad bit flustered. An Ohio man reportedly had the exact same reaction when he won a sizable prize on a Scratch-Off ticket, and he accidentally threw it in the dumpster. Luckily, he realized it before it was too late. View this post on Instagram A post shared by Ohio Lottery (@ohlottery) The Man Jumped Into the Dumpster to Get His Lottery Ticket According to a news release from the Ohio Lottery, the unidentified man had to dig through the trash to retrieve his winning lottery ticket. “A Willard man accidentally threw away his Bingo 25 Times 25 Scratch-Off ticket. Thankfully, he realized it but not before the trash was taken out. He ended up having to dumpster dive to retrieve it. It was definitely worth it because it was a $100,000 winner!” The news release explained. The man had to pay the required 26.75% tax, so at the end of the day, he walked away with $73,250. The Ohio Lottery posted about the man’s incredible win on its Instagram page. Some congratulated him, but one person asked a $1 million question. “What made them throw the ticket away? What made them go to retrieve it?” We may never know. But if his guardian angel led him to the trash, we’d like them to stop over at our place with some helpful hints. We could probably all use that kind of luck. This story’s featured image can be found here