The concept of virginity is a very loaded issue in American culture. If a woman loses hers when she's too young she can be slut-shamed. If a man remains a virgin for too long, he can be bullied for not being manly enough. There is also a whole slew of religious mind games associated with virginity that can give people some serious psychological problems associated with sex.Losing one's virginity has also been blown up way beyond proportion. It's often believed that it's a magical experience—it's usually not. Or that after having sex for the first time people can really start to enjoy living life—not the case. What if we just dropped all of the stigmas surrounding virginity and instead, replaced them with healthy attitudes toward sex and relationships?Writer Cayce LaCorte is going viral on TikTok for the simple way she's taught her five daughters to think about virginity: They don't have to. Lessons in "purity' unfortunately start very young for many girls. Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash LaCorte shared her parenting ideas on TikTok in response to mom-influencer Nevada Shareef's question: "Name something about the way you raised your kids that people think is weird but you think is healthy.""I'm gonna get a lot of shit for this, but what are you gonna do?" she said in the video. "I'm raising my five daughters to believe that there is no such thing as virginity." @jghflkhjklh When it comes to explaining the "why," LaCorte had some extremely strong words on the matter."It is a patriarchal concept used to control women and serves no purpose other than making women feel bad about ourselves," she explained. "Just because some guy randomly sticks his penis in you at some point in your life, it does not change your worth. It does not change who you are. It doesn't do anything other than it happened."LaCorte isn't wrong. Many cultures place a high value on virginity, almost always on female virginity, and the concept is heavily linked with male-ownership and tracking male-lineage. In the middle ages, it was widely believed that if a man had sex with a woman, that he "owned" her and any man shown to have married a "false virgin" was entitled to compensation. The methods for determining and proving virginity were barbaric and akin to the Salem witch trials. Safe to say, there wasn't a lot of due process available for women then!The mom also responded to those who may criticize her for encouraging promiscuity."Sex is important. It's a big deal; it should always be a big deal. It has nothing to do with your first time. It's just ridiculous. The whole concept is ridiculous," the video explained. We can teach our kids to value sex and be extremely careful about who they share physical intimacy without tying in outdated ideas of purity, or that something will be "lost" after they engage in sex. You don't "lose" anything when you have sex for the first time. Giphy LaCorte also believes that sex shouldn't be so closely associated with one's moral character. In other words, so what if someone is promiscuous? Does having a lot of sexual partners make you a bad person? Again, it's a double-standard applied far more heavily to girls. Men who have lots of sex are revered for it."I'm raising them to be good people and have solid foundations and make their own choices and make intelligent choices. Not because some book says not to," she concluded the video.The video made a lot of people realize that virginity is so ingrained in our society that the concept is rarely questioned."I never really thought about this to be honest," one commenter wrote. "I will absolutely be adopting this!! Thank you for sharing.""I have 2 girls, and I think this is how I will teach them when they are older. This would have made me feel more self worth when I was younger," Samantha wrote. Women are judged for losing their virginity; men are mocked for failing to do so. Giphy LaCorte's comments about women and virginity need to be heard. But there should also be more discussion around how men also fight the stigma associated with virginity.Another user added, "The boys need to hear this too - we need to change the conversation and misconception," making the astute point that boys are mocked for not having sex, or for not having enough of it. For kids all of sexes and genders, we need to remove the idea that being a virgin, or not, has any sort of weight on your value as a human being.There's an unwritten law that says men must lose their virginity by the age of 18 or by at least 21 or that somehow they are less of a man. For men that are virgins into their 20s, "Sex goes from being something to be enjoyed to a giant monolith of titanic proportions that casts a shadow over everything they do and who they are," dating coach Harris O'Malley writes.Sex is a tricky issue that everyone should be able to approach in their own way, at their own time. It's great that LaCorte's video has gone viral for illustrating the fact that virginity is just another obstacle on the road to sexual maturity that shouldn't factor into whether we decide to have sex or not.This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

If you've ever perused photographs from the 19th and early 20th century, you've likely noticed how serious everyone looked. If there's a hint of a smile at all, it's oh-so-slight, but more often than not, our ancestors looked like they were sitting for a sepia-toned mug shot or being held for ransom or something. Why didn't people smile in photographs? Was life just so hard back then that nobody smiled? Were dour, sour expressions just the norm?Most often, people's serious faces in old photographs are blamed on the long exposure time of early cameras, and that's true. Taking a photo was not an instant event like it is now; people had to sit still for many minutes in the 1800s to have their photo taken.Ever try holding a smile for only one full minute? It's surprisingly difficult and very quickly becomes unnatural. A smile is a quick reaction, not a constant state of expression. Even people we think of as "smiley" aren't toting around full-toothed smiles for minutes on end. When you had to be still for several minutes to get your photo taken, there was just no way you were going to hold a smile for that long.But there are other reasons besides long exposure times that people didn't smile in early photographs. "Mona Lisa" by Leonardo da Vinci, painted in 1503Public domainThe non-smiling precedent had already been set by centuries of painted portraitsThe long exposure times for early photos may have contributed to serious facial expressions, but so did the painted portraits that came before them. Look at all of the portraits of famous people throughout history prior to cameras. Sitting to be painted took hours, so smiling was out of the question. Other than the smallest of lip curls like the Mona Lisa, people didn't smile for painted portraits, so why would people suddenly think it normal to flash their pearly whites (which were not at all pearly white back then) for a photographed one? It simply wasn't how it was done.A smirk? Sometimes. A full-on smile? Practically never. Algerian immigrant to the United States. Photographed on Ellis Island by Augustus F. Sherman.via William Williams/Wikimedia CommonsSmiling usually indicated that you were a fool or a drunkardOur perceptions of smiling have changed dramatically since the 1800s. In explaining why smiling was considered taboo in portraits and early photos, art historian Nicholas Jeeves wrote in Public Domain Review:"Smiling also has a large number of discrete cultural and historical significances, few of them in line with our modern perceptions of it being a physical signal of warmth, enjoyment, or indeed of happiness. By the 17th century in Europe it was a well-established fact that the only people who smiled broadly, in life and in art, were the poor, the lewd, the drunk, the innocent, and the entertainment […] Showing the teeth was for the upper classes a more-or-less formal breach of etiquette." "Malle Babbe" by Frans Hals, sometime between 1640 and 1646Public domainIn other words, to the Western sensibility, smiling was seen as undignified. If a painter did put a smile on the subject of a portrait, it was a notable departure from the norm, a deliberate stylistic choice that conveyed something about the artist or the subject.Even the artists who attempted it had less-than-ideal results. It turns out that smiling is such a lively, fleeting expression that the artistically static nature of painted portraits didn't lend itself well to showcasing it. Paintings that did have subjects smiling made them look weird or disturbing or drunk. Simply put, painting a genuine, natural smile didn't work well in portraits of old.As a result, the perception that smiling was an indication of lewdness or impropriety stuck for quite a while, even after Kodak created snapshot cameras that didn't have the long exposure time problem. Even happy occasions had people nary a hint of joy in the photographs that documented them.Another reason why people didn't smile in old photos is that dental hygiene wasn't the same as it is today, and people may have been self-conscious about their teeth. “People had lousy teeth, if they had teeth at all, which militated against opening your mouth in social settings,” Angus Trumble, the director of the National Portrait Gallery in Canberra, Australia, and author of A Brief History of the Smile, said, according to Time. Even wedding party photos didn't appear to be joyful occasions.Wikimedia CommonsThen along came movies, which may have changed the whole pictureSo how did we end up coming around to grinning ear to ear for photos? Interestingly enough, it may have been the advent of motion pictures that pushed us towards smiling being the norm.Photos could have captured people's natural smiles earlier—we had the technology for taking instant photos—but culturally, smiling wasn't widely favored for photos until the 1920s. One theory about that timing is that the explosion of movies enabled us to see emotions of all kinds playing out on screen, documenting the fleeting expressions that portraits had failed to capture. Culturally, it became normalized to capture, display and see all kind of emotions on people's faces. As we got more used to that, photo portraits began portraying people in a range of expression rather than trying to create a neutral image of a person's face.Changing our own perceptions of old photo portraits to view them as neutral rather than grumpy or serious can help us remember that people back then were not a bunch of sourpusses, but people who experienced as wide a range of emotion as we do, including joy and mirth. Unfortunately, we just rarely get to see them in that state before the 1920s.This article originally appeared last year.

There are kitten lovers…and then there are Ricky's grandparents. When Izzie Grass left her kitten, Ricky, with her parents for two weeks, she had no idea what was in store for her after she got him back. Not only had Ricky been well taken care of, but his adventures with his human grandparents were fully documented in a photobook created by Grass' mother, which she titled "Ricky Goes to Gramma's and Grampa's.""The photo album that reads like a children's book first went viral when Grass shared it on TikTok in 2020. Now, it has resurfaced again and people are clamoring for more riveting Ricky content after reading about how the kitten "helped Gramma do the dishes" and how "Cousin Jasper and Charlie ate most of" the pancakes Gramma made for him.Check out how adorably extra Gramma is: @goldfishclub I’ll never run out of content. #Rickythesquittenkitten #cats #kitten #animals #pets #fyp #foryou #cute #happy #teachersoftiktok Has any kitten ever been more loved?"I would die for Ricky, Gramma, and Grampa," wrote one commenter."This is GOLD. I want to see 'Ricky Learns to Drive.'" wrote another."My parents didn't even put this much effort into making scrapbooks for ME," shared another.And apparently Grass isn't the only one with pet grandparents who are a little extra. "My mom made a full year calendar of my dog after only watching her for two days," a commenter wrote.Grass told Newsweek that her mom told her she made the book because "that's what she does," adding, "She is known for creating very sentimental gifts." Photobooks make sweet, sentimental gifts.Photo credit: CanvaGrass also shared that the book almost didn't get made because Ricky almost didn't make it as a kitten. He was brought to the veterinary clinic where Grass worked when he was 9 weeks old to be euthanized."The individuals who dropped him off reported that they found a kitten with broken legs and that was throwing up everything they tried to feed him," she said. "I came back from my lunch early to care for this kitten and in the kennel was Ricky."As it turned out, Ricky had some birth defects and health problems that required specialized care, but he didn't need to be euthanized. Grass took him home but needed a little time to prepare to give him the care he needed. Orange kitten playing in the grassPhoto credit: Canva"My mom stepped up and offered to watch him for a couple weeks while I got a handle of my schedule," Grass told Newsweek. "It was during this time that she created the book."The fact that Ricky had specialized care needs at the time makes Gramma's photobook all the more endearing."He has made so much progress," Grass told Newsweek. "His esophagus works significantly better, he has learned how to walk, climb and run, and he continues to help me raise other foster kittens. Ricky is very loved and lives the life he deserved to have." Kittens can make an adventure out of anything Giphy With a mom and grandparents like he has, it's not a surprise. Of course, the internet's going to internet, and some people apparently looked at Ricky's photobook a couple of years after the fact and complained that it was AI generated because of the way Ricky's paws looked. However, as Grass shared in a video in 2024, those paws aren't due to AI. They're just Ricky's real-life deformities that, ironically, make him appear AI-generated in the photobook. (It's also worth mentioning that the photobook video came out well before AI-generated technology became available to the masses.) @goldfishclub He spent two weeks with grandma because I was starting college again as was scared of him being home alone. Mamaw had to be his nanny and make sure he didnt hurt himself. #cat #kitten #animals #pet #goldfishclub #radialhypoplasia "Ricky's legs are actually shaped like candy canes," Grass explains. "That's not AI. That's inbreeding. Spay and neuter your cats." You can find more videos of Ricky and the animals Grass fosters on her TikTok channel here.This article originally appeared two years ago and has been updated.

No one would get a dog expecting it to not bark, try to eat human food or need daily walks. And yet people regularly get flummoxed when their just-as-loveable cat exhibits completely natural behaviors like climbing tabletops or scratching at furniture.Of course, cat people, who delight in adapting their life to make it as enriching as possible for their feline fur babies, know the flaws of this logic. After all, most cats spend more time in the house than their human counterparts. So shouldn’t the house belong just as much to them?If you answered yes—then this clapback video (from a vet, no less), should have you feeling pretty vindicated. And if you answered no—prepare to see the error of your ways.Dr. Matt McGlasson is a veterinarian in Kentucky, who also happens to be the proud dad of a 5-year-old special needs cat named Rupaul.McGlasson recently was told by a viewer that it’s "disgusting" that he allows Rupaul on his furniture (as opposed to human butts only, which are okay, I guess?).McGlasson’s response to this comment recently racked up over 11.8 million views, with good reason.In a clip posted to his Instagram, McGlasson holds up Rupaul, who can’t use her hind legs, and shamelessly lists off all the other things he would allow for his kitty, including:-Cosigning a loan for Rupaul-Letting Rupaul do his taxes-Giving Rupaul the passwords to all of his accounts.-Capital Punishment, which he’s not normally a support of. But if someone hurts Rupaul, “that’s another story."-Going into a business with Rupaul-Giving Rupaul $20,000 for bringing him a dead mouse-Making Rupaul the beneficiary on my life insurance policy.And last, but certainly not least…letting Rupaul on the furniture.Put simply: “My cat can do whatever she wants. It's her world. I'm just living in it.” See on Instagram Down in the comments, fellow cat owners couldn’t agree more with McGlasson’s sentiment.“My husband picked his new chair based on the cat , the arm had to be wide enough for her to sit whenever she chooses to have quality time with him.”“I would donate my kidneys to Square if she needed them. Yes… I mean both ?”“‘You let your cat sleep with you?’ Ma’am, I’d let him represent me in court.”“I bought my house for my senior kitties. I wanted to get out of our apartment so they could feel grass beneath their paws again before their time was up.”Others reiterated how it’s a gift to be able to create a healthy, happy life for a pet, and freaking out about furniture is kind of missing the joint.“Like I don't understand ppl who r so against cats on furniture. If ur against pets on furniture probably don't have them. Treat your pets with love and respect. When you take an animal into ur home it becomes their home and safe place. All of the things in ur house become a part of their world and cats like to naturally be elevated. My cats do what they want because they aren't pets they are family. They own the place I just live here. Lol,” wrote one person.Bottom line: climbing is part of a cat’s inherent programming. And if cat owners truly want their home to be a safe space for their kitty, then this should be taken into consideration.The good news is, there are plenty of cat-friendly ways you can coax them off of furniture, like making sure there are plenty of dedicated cat trees to climb and scratching posts to sink their claws into, or opting for furniture with fabrics that cats don’t love as much, like microfiber.And as a general rule, cats respond to positive reinforcement, rather than punishment. Contrary to outdated, yet still popular belief, cats don’t “know” when they're being bad. And they will learn to associate their own with negative attention. That’s not fun for anyone.As McGlasson, or any other pet owner can attest, having their presence in our homes provides so much fulfillment and connection, that small compromises—or large bank loans—are well worth it.By the way, McGlasson’s TikTok and Instagram are full of hilarious (and informative!) cat content. Here's a small sampling: See on Instagram See on Instagram See on Instagram For more pawsome videos just like these, be sure to give McGlasson a follow.This article originally appeared last year.