It’s nothing new for parents to lament their kid’s ever growing list of school requirements. From piles of homework to getting graded for school supplies, the pressures seem to be ot only racking up over time, but spreading to younger and younger grades. And it’s not just parents who have noticed the shift. Recently, longtime kindergarten teacher Ms. Kelli, of the TikTok account @the_wondermint, reflected on how different it is for students at even an introductory level. In the clip, Kelli begins, “So I just gotta ask, as a 20-year kindergarten teacher myself, remember when we went to kindergarten that we just had to be potty trained and not eat the glue?” Comparing that to the long list of requirements nowadays, the educator says she feels sorry for families going through it. “My heart breaks when I see all these videos of what do you need to do to prepare your child for kindergarten, and things your child must know before going to kindergarten, and these lists of things that parents need to be working on.” Keli argues that “human development hasn't changed. What a five or six-year-old child is physically, mentally and developmentally able to do hasn't changed, in all these years.” Still, the standards have changed. And kids are paying the price. So she encourages fellow teachers and parents to not force the educational aspect. “The learning will come. The development will come, the ABCs, the one, two, threes, writing, all of it, it will come ... Curriculum, it will happen. The learning, it will happen,” she says. @the_wondermint Little bit of a plea and PSA for the day… let them be kids! #teachersontiktok #teachertok #teachersoftiktok #iteachk #kindergarten #ilovekindergarten #iloveteaching #foryoupage #teacherforyoupage #fypage #teacherfyp #playbasedlearning #seethewonderkeepitfresh #handsonlearning #reggioemilia #letthemexplore #parentsontiktok #parentsoftiktok #kindergartenparents #kinderprep #backtoschool ♬ original sound - The Classrooms of Ms. Kelli Instead of placing more pressure, Kelli suggests a gentler, simpler approach. “Let them play, let them socialize with each other. Let them learn to be away from their mommy and daddy and be sad for a little bit and be comforted. Let them find friendships that are gonna make them laugh so hard that their bellies ache and tell stories that go home. Let them create something that they never thought they could. Let them do an art project where they turn a box into a robot and they’re so excited to show their parents!” In short: “let kids be kids.” Kelli’s video seemed to really resonate with parents and teachers alike, who have definitely felt like certain aspects of childhood have been sacrificed in the name of “productivity.” Especially when it comes to homework. “Yes! My son struggled in Kindergarten last year and even had homework! I could not believe what all he had to know. Teacher said he had a hard time paying attention… yeah he is 5!” one mom shared. “Finally someone said it,” added another. “The curriculum is insane for elementary school kiddos. They have absolutely lost their childhood.”One person noted “the kindergarten report card used to be things like skipping, walking on a balance beam, the hardest thing was counting to 100.”As for whether or not a more academic-focused approach to kindergarten is, in fact, less beneficial to kids— a 2019 study in the American Educational Research Journal did find that it led to improvements, both academic and interpersonal, in the long run. But that doesn’t necessarily mean to load them up with a ton of work for after school, though. Another study reported that elementary school students, on average, are assigned three times the recommended amount of homework. This is why Kelli created a follow up video sharing why she doesn’t assign homework to her own students. “We are covering what we’re covering in the five or six hours with these little babies, and if we can’t cover that in that time, we’re definitely not gonna get the best out of them at 5, 6 o’clock at night when they’re tired and they should be enjoying time with their family,” she said. She does, however, advocate trying to instill a “love of reading,” if you can count that as homework. But even then, that assignment looks more like snuggling in bed, cozying up with a book, and having their parents read it to them. Point being: of course school is meant to help set up students for success. But if it robs them of their precious, formative and oh-so temporary childhood, then is it really worth it?

There are few things in this world more delightful than a child's imagination. Once in a while, we get a clear glimpse into that world when a kid does something that makes us scratch our heads and smile ear to ear in equal measure. For instance, when a toddler finds a dead cicada and adopts it as a beloved companion. Mom Izzy Wherry has been sharing her daughter's adventures and escapades with a cicada corpse that are hilariously endearing. The little one found a dead cicada in the family's yard, and for an entire month has been bringing him along with her everywhere she goes. He gets baths, he gets swung on the swing, he has his own remote office outside where he types on his little computer keyboard, and more. See on Instagram He goes to the park, he's gone on a camping trip, and he even went to the dentist, where he lay next to Wherry's daughter on the dentist's chair as if he were an actual emotional support pet. See on Instagram People are celebrating the girl's creative and compassionate care for her formerly-living friend as well as the cicada getting to live his best afterlife. "He's lived a full life since he died ?""Would you still love me if I was a dead cicada?""It's going to be the ring bearer on her wedding day.""If he only knew how loved he is. ?"Many people expressed how beautiful it is to see a child just being a quintessential child. Some parents would never let their child carry a bug carcass around like this, but it's clear that this lone, dead cicada means something to this kiddo. Cicadas are loud (when they're alive), large and tough (the fact that he hasn't fallen apart yet is a testament to that), but it's notable that she's so careful and gentle in the way she handles him. Wherry confirmed that her daughter knows that the cicada is actually dead, but she still uses her imagination to bring him to life, which is both hilarious and sweet. "I absolutely love her imagination and creativity!!!???""This so sweet and so innocent. Almost a shame they have to grow up.""This is sooooo precious i love when parents let their kids be unapologetically kids ❤️""My daughter littered our home with rollie pollies and named them all MR. She collected rocks as well in all of her pockets. Wash day was a bit crazy ?""My daughter found a dead ladybug and she made her a jacuzzi from a walnut shell...with saliva...""iPad kid ❌ playing with corpses ✅ maybe there is hope for the new generation."in a world where parents are constantly battling television and tablets and other screen-based technologies, it's lovely to see a child engaging natural play inspired by the outdoors. Carrying around a dead cicada may not have been what her parents had in mind when they took their kiddo outside, but that's the beauty of children engaging with the natural world—you just never know what they're going to discover, create, collect or become attached to. Seeing a child's imagination in action is a fleeting privilege, and to capture and share it with others is a wonderful gift. Thanks to this family and the dead cicada for letting us into a little one's world for a while.You can follow Izzy Wherry and her daughter's cicada adventures on Instagram.

Almost every long term relationship suffers from a rut eventually. That goes especially for married partners who become parents and have the added responsibility of raising kids. Maintaining a connection is hard enough in this busy, fast paced world. Top it off with making sure kids are awake, dressed, entertained, well fed, oh yeah, and alive…and you best believe all you have energy for at the end of the day is sitting on the couch barely making it through one episode on Netflix.And yet, we know how important it is to maintain a connection with our spouses. Many of us just don’t know how to make that happen while juggling a million other things. According to one mom, a “three-hour night” could be just the thing to tick off multiple boxes on the to-do list while rekindling romance at the same time. Talk about the ultimate marriage hack. The three-hour night was something that Rachel Higgins and her husband began incorporating into their lives at the beginning of this year. And so far, “it's been so fun and such like a game changer for how our evenings go,” she says in a clip posted to TikTok. Before using the three-hour night, the evening would look a bit like this: their daughter would go to bed, they would lounge on the couch, scroll through social media, then fall asleep. Sound familiar?But with a three hour night, Higgins and her husband divvy up the time before bed into three section, each for a different focus. In the first hour, starting around 7 p.m., is what Higgins calls “productive time,” during which the couple sees to any household chores that might need to be done. “So start with like a quick cleanup of the kitchen or just like things that accumulated throughout the day, and then we try to do something that either ... has been being put off or cleaning the bathroom or like organizing the pantry or hall closet or something like, super random like sharpening the knives. Anything that's productive for the household,” she explains. @rachelleehiggins if you’re stuck in a rut with your evenings try this! i saw someone do something similar to this a while ago but can’t remember who! #marriage #1sttimeparents #newyearsgoals ♬ original sound - Rachel Higgins Next, the second hour is geared towards re-establishing a physical or emotional connection in their marriage. The phones go away, and they focus only on enjoying one another. “So, that could be things like showering together or ‘having fun’ together, playing a game together, or just like anything that's gonna get you guys talking and connecting or like debriefing from the day or just like talking about what you're doing and like the plans for tomorrow or like how works going or whatever. So, anything that's gonna connect and strengthen and build your marriage,” Higgins says. Lastly, the final hour of the night is dedicated towards anything Higgins and her husband individually want to do, any sort of personal recharge activity. Since this is a judgment free time, Higgins states that “If you just want to lay on the couch and scroll your phone and watch TikToks or whatever like watch YouTube videos,” it’s totally acceptable. Higgins’ novel approach definitely interested viewers, who chimed in with their own questions. One major concern was how the heck this could be done every night. But even Higgins admits that she and her husband don’t succeed at having a three-hour night every night—they usually try for about 3-4 times a week. And honestly even once a week could still probably be beneficial in building intimacy. Others wondered how to have a three-hour night when things randomly popped up in their schedule, like when kids won’t magically go to sleep promptly at 7pm. Higgins shares that in these cases, they tend to just shorten each phase. The point being: these can and probably should be customizable, even fun, rather than yet another rigid chore.Plus, a three hour night (or whatever your version of a three-hour night may be) is a great way to remind yourself just how high of a priority your relationship has in your life…no matter what else is going on at the time. Odds are you'll probably find you do have more time for it than you previously thought when you set aside time for it. This article originally appeared on 1.8.24

In recent years, baby boomers have often been the target of criticism from younger generations. The most common accusations are that boomers are selfish and don’t care about leaving ample resources (whether financial or environmental) to subsequent generations.They also come under fire for not being able to acknowledge that it was easier for people of their generation to come of age when things were more affordable and life was a lot less competitive.However, we should also understand that many of today’s problems are not the boomers’ doing, especially when it comes to the issues that stem from entitled children and technology run amok. In hindsight, there’s something to be said about the importance that boomers placed on self-reliance, letting kids be kids and having a healthy skepticism towards technology.In the end, each generation contributes to the tapestry of society in its unique way, whether good or bad, even baby boomers. This became evident after a Reddit user named Youssef4573 asked the AskReddit subforum: ‘What is something you can say ‘I'm with the boomers on this one’ about?” Over 4,700 people responded to the prompt, and the most prevalent problems mentioned by the younger generations were overreliance on technology, the modern world’s lack of human touch and how Gen Xers and millennials have raised their children.Here are 17 things that younger people are “with the boomers” about.1. Public filming"Just because I’m in public doesn’t mean I want to be filmed. Yeah, I know legally you can, but common courtesy people." — Jayne_of_Canton2. Customer service"I want to talk to a person in customer service, not a machine." — lumpy_space_queenie"And also a person that actually works at the company I bought the product from, not a teenager at an outsourced call center with a script to follow and who answers calls for 15 different companies on the same day." — Loive.3. Turn up the dialog"For the love of all that is holy, can we fix the audio in movies so that the music and sound FX aren’t drowning out the dialogue?" — Caloso"And the action sequences don’t burst your eardrums or the dialogue is whispers." — Whynottry-again4. Bring back buttons"No, I don't need everything in my car to be electronic. Some stuff needs buttons." — LamborghiniHEAT"This was the big thing for me in my last car - trying to adjust volume or change songs while driving is way more dangerous when it’s all touch screen. Thankfully my current car has physical knobs for everything." — GeekdomCentral5. App overload"Every store/service does not need an app." — BigDigger324"I was standing at a car rental counter at an airport (boomer here) to rent a car. My daughter’s car broke down on the way to pick me up. While standing at the counter, with a customer service rep right there and not busy, I had to log in to their site, create an account, and reserve a car. It seemed ridiculous and it took a long time, filling in my license information and all that. This was last September." — Cleanslate6. Bring back DIY"Learning DIY skills is crucial. I had basically zero DIY skills when I bought my house because I had lived in apartments for so long and I've had to learn a lot. YouTube tutorials are absolutely clutch." — JingleJongleBongle7. Turn off the speakerphone"I hated this when I worked at Walmart. So many of my coworkers would talk on speaker or watch TikTok at full volume. It's just trashy imo, nobody wants to hear your media." — WhiteGuy1x"I work at an emergency medical office and holy sh*t the amount of people that sit in a quiet, peaceful lobby and just have the LOUDEST conversations on their phone…. Speaker or otherwise. Not to mention the people that still watch sh*t without headphones. Like do you not see the plethora of other people around you that you’re disturbing?" — Cinderpuppins8. Ban QR code menus"I think menus should be tangible." — Limp-Management9684"QR codes kill the vibe. We’re all on our phones constantly throughout the day and then when you go to spend some quality time with someone, it’s another excuse to whip out the phone and stare at it. There’s an intimacy to a physical menu. You’re looking at what the other person is reading, you’re each pointing to parts of the menu. You’re noticing the lighting of the restaurant. QR codes feel chintzy and kill the ambiance completely." — VapeDerp4209. Stop subscriptions"When I was your age, you only had to pay for a video game once to own it." — CattonCruthby10. Free the children"A kid in 2024 should have the same freedom to exist unsupervised and move about their community independently as a boomer did growing up." — PixelatedFish"The world is safer than it's ever been and people are more scared than ever. I blame true crime and local news." ⲻ Unhappyhippo14211. Kids need to touch grass"Kids shouldn't be on phones or iPads all the time. It makes them weird." — Ubstantial_Part_952"The same could be said about most adults." — DrunkOctopus12. Stop being so sensitive"People in our generation are far, far too sensitive. Don't get it twisted; empathy is, by and large, a good thing and it takes some serious doing for me to say it's gone too far. But collectively, we've become people willing to throw every last bit of energy fighting against every slight and making sure our pet cause gets top billing to the point of fighting amongst each other even if we're in almost complete agreement otherwise. Emotional energy - like any other kind of energy - is very much a finite resource. Whereas boomers could at least generally agree to disagree and get on with things (obvious cross-wielding exceptions doth apply). Culturally, we've lost sight of the adage of 'winning the battle, losing the war.'" — almighty_smiley13. Stop delivery"Food delivery services are a complete ripoff; if you use them regularly, you’re terrible with money. Get off my lawn." — VapeDerp42014. Parking meters"So rather than throwing a few coins in your meter, you have to now get your license plate #, get your meter number, go to the meter station, stand in line with everyone waiting to pay their meter, then you're set. It's an unnecessary amount of extra steps. I don't carry cash much anymore, but I can hide a small amount of coin in my car to quickly pay a meter." — Luke511915. Kids should know their place"Not letting your children rule the roost. When did it become acceptable to let your kids back-talk to you, slap you, climb all over shi*t in public places? As we've raised ours, I've witnessed so many parents around us just let these behaviors slide. It's kind of sad when I'm the one saying things like, "Did I just hear you just say that to your mom?!?!?!?! That is not ok. You go and apologize right now!!". Then I get this stunned "deer in headlights" look back that tells me they aren't used to someone calling them out on their behavior." — Cobblestone-Villain16. Pride in ownership"Seems that a lot of boomers have pride of ownership and enjoy maintaining what they have." — Awkward_Bench12317. Don't follow leaders"My dad (a solid boomer) has been saying that ALL politicians are crooks since he became disenchanted with politics around the Nixon era. He was starry-eyed before that, trying to make social change, yada yada. He still votes, but holds his nose. Can’t say I disagree with him." — Thin_white_duchessThis article originally appeared on 1.23.24

Teresa Kaye Newman, a teacher about to have a son, knows a lot about how to deal with children. So she created a list of 11 things she agrees with Boomers on when it comes to raising kids.Newman believes she has credibility on the issue because she has 13 years of experience dealing with “hundreds and hundreds” of other people’s kids and has seen what happens when her so-called “Boomer” parenting principles aren’t implemented.Of course, Newman is using some broad stereotypes in calling for a return to Boomer parenting ideas when many Gen X, Millennial and Gen Z parents share the same values. But, as someone who deals with children every day, she has the right to point out that today’s kids are entitled and spend too much time staring at screens. Here are the 11 things that Newman agrees with Boomers on when it comes to raising kids.11 Things I agree with boomer parents on raising children @teresakayenewman 11 Things I agree with boomer parents on raising children, as a #teacher and soon to be mom. 1. No iPads“All I’m going to say is my kid has a whole world to explore and none of that has to do with being stuck in front of a tablet.”2. No smartphone until high school“Kids that are younger than that age do not know internet safety to a point where I feel comfortable letting them have free reign of the internet.”3. Teaching the value of education“What I’m going to teach them is [education] has nothing to do with how much money you’re making or how successful you’ll be professionally. But you will still value it, nonetheless. You will go with it as far as you possibly can, and then once you’re done with it, you can do whatever you want.”4. Respect your teachers and treat them well“This may be biased because I am a teacher, but everyone who has gone through a professional degree program and has put in the time and is there, giving you the quality education, deserves some type of attention and deserves to be treated well.”5. Be kind to elderly folks“If they’re on public transportation and they’re sitting down and there’s an old lady standing next to them and there are no other seats available, my child will know to stand up and give that lady his seat.”6. Yes ma’amNewman will teach her kid to use the terms sir and ma’am when speaking to adults. “It does not matter your age or status in society, as long as they are respecting their pronouns, that’s how we’re gonna be talking to other people.”7. Greetings and gratitude“Simple greetings and simple terms of gratitude are just not being taught like they used to. I think it’s really sad.”8. Consequences for poor behavior“If they’re neglecting their schoolwork and not doing what they’re supposed to do, they get their technology taken away. … Simple things like this are pretty common sense and I’m not sure why they’re not being done anymore.”9. Respect adult conversations and spaces“They don’t get to interrupt 2 adults speaking to each other. They don’t get to come and butt in at an inappropriate time when 2 people are talking to each other."10. Clean your mess“My child is going to put as much work in the house as we are regardless of whether he’s paying rent out of his own pocket or not. That’s because when my son becomes an adult, I want him to be a partner or a spouse or a roommate that someone is proud to have around.”11. Bedtime“I don’t care how old my kid is as long as he is living under my roof as a minor; he’s gonna have some sort of bedtime. But this staying up until 3 or 4 or 5 o’clock in the morning or pulling all-nighters like kids are used to … is absolutely not normal. And I’m not going to have a kid that’s staying up that late and then not waking up the next day.”This article originally appeared on 12.20.23

Parenting has changed. A lot. So many things our parents did that were considered normal in our childhood—that is, for all us millennials and Gen Xers—would simply never fly today.This is thanks in large part to the digital age, and the countless ways to access information. Radio, magazines, television, books, online blogs, Facebook parent groups, informational podcasts, public studies…thousands of voices helping shape family dynamics and warn of potential dangers.If there’s ever any doubt into how far we’ve come, let technology once again remind you. A trip down memory lane via TikTok might be, as the kids say, a bit cringe, but boy can it help instill a little gratitude.On a mission to share her childhood “one home video at a time,” a woman named Rachel has an entire TikTok account dedicated to short glimpses of her younger years. Her content is an instant nostalgic hit for those of us who grew up in the 80s or 90s. We’re talking Rainbow Brite, roller skates, Sesame Street, backpack purses when they were cool for the first time. All the feel good stuff. And also—maybe some of the not-so-feel-good stuff. Recently, Rachel shared a video of herself as a newborn with her mom…when viewers noticed something strange in her bottle. @nostalgicallyrachel Replying to @B Indeed, it is. ? #wildtimes #wesurvived #taboo #homemovie #homevideo #nostalgia #nostalgic #80s #90s #1990s #1980s #memories #family #throwback #80sbaby #90sbaby #childhood #childhoodmemories #wholesome #oklahoma #takemeback #vlog #mylife #history #vintage #retro #90skid #80skid #80saesthetic #90saesthetic #vhs #smalltown #aesthetic #growingupinthe90s #millennial #millennialtok #1986 #response #react #water #indeed #newborn #baby #mom #breastfed ♬ Roslyn - Bon Iver & St. Vincent “I’m sorry — IS THAT WATER,” one concerned viewer asked. Rachel followed up with , “Indeed, it is”, writing “Sugar Water for Newborns circa 1986” in the video caption. Once upon a time, sugar water was used as a bit of a cure-all for infants, helping fight off common colds, ease bellyaches, and everything in between.And while some studies do show that sugar water can help ease pain, and certain hospitals do use it during painful procedures, professionals still suggest against administering it at home.For one thing, babies don’t need water until they’re six months old. They get all the hydration they need from breastmilk or formula, according to WebMd. Second, the Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee says that any foods or beverages with added sugar should be avoided “during the first two years of life,” as it is likely to replace more nourishing foods and cause nutrient deficiency, and is “linked with increased risk of overweight or obesity.”But for many parents today, this is not new news. Which made Rachel’s video so horrifying.“As a new mom this genuinely is making me want to cry ? There was so much misinformation back then. Those poor babies,” one person wrote.Of course, it could be worse. As one person shared, “My mom gave me Mountain Dew in my bottle ?.” Yikes.In another video, this one captioned “parenting before the internet” and shared by dad and TikTokker Vaughn Trainor, we see another bane of modern parenting—rice cereal.Specifically, rice cereal being fed to newborns. Experts say that solid foods should not be introduced into a baby’s diet until at least four months old, when they can hold their head and sit upright on their own, start grabbing at things and show interest in food when the parents begin eating.In this video, however, Trainor is one month old, laid back (also a big no no!) and being spoon fed by his mom, who is heard quoting the parenting magazine that suggested heavier things be eaten this way. @mrvaughntrainor Parenting before the internet ? i turned out alright ?? #parenting #parentinghumor #90sparenting #babiesoftiktok #viral #funnyvideos ♬ original sound - Mrvaughntrainor Over 5,000 people commented on this one, many of whom noted how this type of diet might influence common digestive issues many adults face.And while there could be several factors contributing to this that go beyond what we were fed as babies, it is true that millennials seem to suffer the worst when it comes to gut health.But it’s not just problematic food choices. Rachel shared yet another home video, this one titled “Nursery Tour circa 1986,” that showed her baby self lying in a crib surrounded by pillows, stuffed animals, and, for some reason, a mirror. @nostalgicallyrachel Nursery Tour circa 1986 ?? #nursery #baby #babytok #nurserytour #home #hometour #homemovie #homevideo #nostalgia #nostalgic #80s #90s #1990s #1980s #memories #family #throwback #80sbaby #90sbaby #childhood #childhoodmemories #wholesome #oklahoma #takemeback #vlog #mylife #history #vintage #retro #90skid #80skid #80saesthetic #90saesthetic #vhs #smalltown #aesthetic #growingupinthe90s #millennial #crib #cribsafety ♬ A Gentle Sunlight - James Quinn But it’s not just problematic food choices. Rachel shared yet another home video, this one titled “Nursery Tour circa 1986,” that showed her baby self lying in a crib surrounded by pillows, stuffed animals, and, for some reason, a mirror. …All of which can be life threatening and lead to Sudden Unexpected Infant Death (SUID), if you ask the American Academy of Pediatrics. Which is why this comment pretty much sums up everyone’s collective feeling: “It’s a miracle any of us survived.”And while we can obviously make the case for “I’m still here, so it couldn't’ have been that bad,” when you look at infant mortality statistics, which is the lowest it’s ever been worldwide, it’s hard to deny that maybe, just maybe, being more savvy about childcare could have something to do with that.So, yes, many parents today might lean towards being more anxious by comparison. But it’s only because death is literally lurking at every corner! Yay vindication! And as mortifying as some of these parenting behaviors might seem to us now, what doesn’t seem to change is parents wanting to raise a healthy kid, to the very best of their ability. We might have gentler, more science-backed ways to go about it, but the love remains the same. This article originally appeared on 9.27.23

A new trend in treasure hunting called magnet fishing has blown up over the past two years, evidenced by an explosion of YouTube channels covering the hobby. Magnet fishing is a pretty simple activity. Hobbyists attach high-powered magnets to strong ropes, drop them into waterways and see what they attract.The hobby has caught the attention of law enforcement and government agencies because urban waterways are a popular place for criminals to drop weapons and stolen items after committing a crime. In 2019, a magnet fisherman in Michigan pulled up an antique World War I mortar grenade and the bomb squad had to be called out to investigate. Fifteen-year-old George Tindale and his dad, Kevin, 52, of Grantham, Lincolnshire in the U.K., made an incredible find earlier this month when they used two magnets to pull up a safe that had been submerged in the River Witham.George has a popular magnet fishing YouTube channel called “Magnetic G.”After the father-and-son duo pulled the safe out of the murky depths, they cracked it open with a crowbar and found about $2,500 Australian dollars (US$1,800), a shotgun certificate and credit cards that expired in 2004. The Tindales used the name found on the cards to find the safe’s owner, Rob Everett.Everett’s safe was stolen during an office robbery in 2000 and then dumped into the river. “I remember at the time, they smashed into a cabinet to get to the safe,” Everett said, according to The Daily Mail. “I was just upset that there was a nice pen on my desk, a Montblanc that was never recovered.” The safe was stolen in the year 2000 \n\n#magnetfishinghttps://www.granthamjournal.co.uk/news/teenager-finds-safe-containing-thousands-of-dollars-9250637/\u00a0\u2026 — Grantham Journal (@Grantham Journal) 1650615191 The robber, who was a teenage boy, was apprehended soon after the crime because he left behind a cap with his name stitched inside.The father and son met up with Everett to return his stolen money and the businessman gave George a small reward for his honesty. He also offered him an internship because of the math skills he displayed in the YouTube video when he counted the Australian dollars. “What’s good about it is, I run a wealth management company and… I’d love him to work for us," Everett said.Although the safe saga began with a robbery 22 years ago, its conclusion has left Everett with more faith in humanity.“I was just amazed that they’d been able to track me down,” he said. “There are some really nice and good people in this world. They could have kept the money, they could have said they attempted to get hold of me.”“There’s a big lesson there. It teaches George that doing good and being honest and giving back is actually more rewarding than taking,” Everett added.Treasure hunting isn’t the only allure of the hobby for George. His mother says the hobby has taught him a lot about water pollution and its effects on local wildlife. “George is very environmentally conscious. He always has been since primary school,” she said. “When he first started to do this, he was after treasure. Everything ends up in the rivers and canals.”This article originally appeared on 04.25.22

You know that feeling you get when you walk into a classroom and see someone else's stuff on your desk?OK, sure, there are no assigned seats, but you've been sitting at the same desk since the first day and everyone knows it.So why does the guy who sits next to you put his phone, his book, his charger, his lunch, and his laptop in the space that's rightfully yours? It's annoying.All you want to do was walk in, sit down, get out your notebook and (try to) pay attention. But now? Now you've got to talk to a stranger about moving their stuff and there goes your day, already bogged down with petty annoyances.Sound familiar? It should.We've all got so much to do these days that interacting with people we see every day — not our friends, but our classmates, fellow commuters, co-workers, the people in line for coffee with us every day — can feel like a burden.So, when these people do something we perceive as annoying, like putting their stuff on our desks, we don't have the time or the energy to assume their intentions or think about the lives they're leading.But if we stepped out of ourselves for a second, we might just realize that we're all much more connected than we think, that our preconceived notions of others are usually just that — preconceived. And, often, inaccurate.That's why this Twitter story about a guy who learned an important life lesson from a classmate he was frustrated with is going viral.It's the perfect example of that "don't judge a book by its cover" adage we should have all learned in preschool but sometimes forget. And it starts the exact same way as this post — with a college student groaning on the inside as he sees someone's stuff on his desk. — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) — (@) If not for this one day running late, McFall may have never realized what his classmate was trying to do. And he may have continued to think of him as annoying, maybe telling others about "the weird guy who was always trying to take up my space"... when all the guy was really trying to do was be kind. We all misinterpret the actions of others sometimes. It's easy to do that! But if there's one thing this story reminds us, it's that it's important to stop and remember that while you're living your life, other people are living theirs, so assuming best intentions can do us a great favor. That's why we should step outside of our bubbles and engage with the world on a regular basis. You could make a new friend. You might brighten someone's day. But most importantly, getting out of your own head, checking your own biases, and giving others the benefit of the doubt will make you a more compassionate person. You don't have to engage with everyone you meet, but the next time someone smiles and offers you a high-five? Maybe just take them up on it.This article was originally published on April 16, 2018.

I grew up black in a very white neighborhood in a very white city in a very white state.As such, I am a lot of people's only black friend.Being the only black friend is a gift and a curse. I am black and I love having friends. But I am also, at any given moment, expected to be a translator, an ambassador, a history teacher, and/or a walking, talking invitation into "I am not racist" territory. It's a lot to handle. See what I mean about that curse?So when I saw the animated short-film "Your Black Friend," I felt so seen. Clearly, I am not alone.The film, which was written, designed, and narrated by Ben Passmore and is based on his mini-comic of the same name, is a brilliant, refreshing way to examine whiteness and racism. The comic and animated short are an open-letter from "your black friend" to you, their well-meaning white friend, about bias, alienation, and what it means to be a good ally and friend.It's funny, honest, and heartbreaking in equal measure. And speaking from personal experience, it captures the experience of being a black friend to white people pretty much perfectly.So if you're a "woke" friend and ally, here are some things your black friend wants you to know.1. You're going to have to get uncomfortable.It could be something as obvious and upsetting as a racist joke. Or something as "benign" as your aunt suggesting you cross the street when she sees a group of black kids walking by. But either way, if you want to be a good friend and a real ally, you're going to have to speak up. You're going to have to have those tough conversations with people you care about.It's not easy to confront strangers or people you love, but if you don't do it, you are part of the problem. Sitting out isn't an option. No one said being an ally is easy.2. "Your black friend would like to say something to the racist lady, but doesn't want to appear to be that 'angry black man.'""He knows this type of person expects that from him, and he will lose before he begins," Passmore says.Black people can't always react or respond the way we want to. When I am followed in a department store, pulled over for no reason, or stared at while picking up dinner at the fancy grocery store, I can't stop what I'm doing and yell, "YES, I AM BLACK. NO, I AM NOT A CRIMINAL YOU SMALL-MINDED, BIASED ASSHOLES." Trust me, I want to. But especially when police are involved, I have to be calm, respectful, and obedient.That's where you come in. You, white friend, need to speak up and say something when I can't. If you are not at risk, nor considered a threat, you have a certain amount of privilege in these situations. Use it to demand answers, speak to supervisors, or if things really get dicey, pull out your phone and hit record.3. We are constantly monitoring our surroundings and adjusting our clothes, hair, speed, and speech to maintain white comfort.We don't like it, but one small choice — like deciding whether or not to wear a hood, or the speed at which we reach into our glove box — can be the difference between life and death.When I am in a parking garage and walking behind a white woman, I intentionally cough or walk a little louder so she turns and notices me.Why? Because when I don't, that same white woman will often clutch her purse and occasionally let out an audible gasp as I pass her. This is something my white friends likely don't realize I have to do. Some of them may even be the pearl-clutchers in the parking lot.But to maintain white comfort and to avoid having the cops called on us, we often have to tamp down clothes, modify our speech and volume, even do our hair differently. We have to have "the talk" with our kids about how the world sees them, and how act in order to make sure they come home alive.No, it's not fair. No, we don't like it. But so long as this country and its institutions are built on a solid foundation of white supremacy, it's a grim reality. You need to know that, and take it up with your fellow white people about how to dismantle it.4. "Your black friend wishes you'd play more than Beyoncé. There are more black performers than Beyoncé.""Lemonade" was awesome. There is no denying it. And yes, I love seeing her iconic looks on Instagram too. But there is more to black music and black art than Beyoncé. Dip a toe outside your comfort zone and try new new artists and genres you may not be familiar with. Go listen, see it, and experience it for yourself.And while we're here, you can't say the n-word when you sing along. Nope. You just can't.5. Speaking of which, performative blackness is really uncomfortable.When you wear that braided wig on Halloween, or use your "blaccent" when you're around me or other black people, it hurts. It's not cute or charming, and it definitely doesn't make you seem cool.Our culture and heritage are not costumes you can slide on and off at your convenience. We don't get to be black only when it suits us. Neither do you.6. "Your black friend feels like a man without a country."Having white friends and seeming to "fit in" with the majority can feel really alienating. You can feel too "white" for black people, and too "black" for white people when all you want to do is find people to eat pizza with. As Passmore wrote, "He is lost in this contradiction, and held responsible for it."7. We would love it if we could stop talking about our anxiety and frustrations regarding racism. But right now, that's impossible.Our concerns are urgent and real. We're getting subpar health care. We're disenfranchised. We're over-policed. We're thrown in jail. We're killed by people sworn to protect us. It's exhausting, but we have to keep talking about it. So do you.We can't be expected to dismantle white supremacy on our own.Our white friends and allies need to step up and gather their people. Have the tough conversations. Speak up when you see racism, discrimination, and microaggressions. The time to talk about it is done. Be about it, or find yourself a new black friend.Watch "Your Black Friend" in full and check out Passmore's book, "Your Black Friend And Other Strangers." This article was written by Erin Canty and originally published on January 30, 2018.

You always stole my thunder. You gave them everything they wanted. You never said no when they asked for anything. Tina Platamura A second helping of dessert. Candy before dinner. A few more minutes in the bath. Money for the ice cream truck.I struggled to show you respect and appreciation while trying to make sure you didn't spoil my children. I thought you would turn them into “selfish brats" by giving them everything they wanted. I thought they might never learn to wait, to take turns, to share, because you granted their wishes as soon as they opened their mouths and pointed.You held each one of my babies long after they fell asleep. Didn't you understand that I needed them to learn to fall asleep on their own?You ran to them as soon as they made the tiniest sound. How would they ever learn to self-soothe?I resented you for buying the best and most expensive gifts on their birthdays and on Christmas. How could I possibly compete with you?"I thought they might never learn to wait, to take turns, to share, because you granted their wishes as soon as they opened their mouths and pointed."And how they loved afternoons spent with you. You made their favorite things for dinner — three different meals for three different boys. And you always had a little surprise. A present, candy, or a special treat. I didn't want them to associate you with gifts and sweets. I thought they should love you for you. I tried to tell you this, but you wouldn't listen.I spent a lot of time wondering why you did all these things and how I could get you to ease up. I know grandmothers are supposed to “spoil the kids" then send them home, but you were ... ridiculous.Until you were gone.I had to hold my boys and tell them that their grandma died. It didn't seem possible — you were supposed to be there for all the other special moments: proms, graduations, weddings. But they lost their grandma too soon and too suddenly. They were not ready to say goodbye.During those years when I wished you'd stop spoiling them, I never thought about how much you loved them. So much that you showed it in every way possible. Your cooking. The gifts. The candy and sweets. Your presence. The way you could recount every detail of a special moment, whether it was a perfect catch in the outfield or a sweet and slightly off-key note sung at a school concert. Your grandmotherly love for them knew no bounds. Your heart poured love from every place possible — your kitchen, your pocketbook, your words, and your tireless arms.It's pointless to dwell on regrets, but I often think about how I had it all wrong. I was so wrong in how I perceived your generosity.My kids, now in their teens, miss you dearly. And they don't miss your gifts or your money. They miss you.They miss running to greet you at the door and hugging you before you could step in. They miss looking up at the bleachers and seeing you, one of their biggest fans, smiling and enthralled to catch their eye. They miss talking to you and hearing your words of wisdom, encouragement and love.If I could speak to you one more time, I would tell you that every time a precious moment steals my heart, every time I watch them arrive at a new milestone, and every time they amaze me with their perseverance, talents, or triumphs, I think of you. And I wish that they could have you back.Come back and love them one last time, like no one else in the world but a grandmother could. Bring your sweets and surprises. Reward them with gifts for the smallest accomplishments. Painstakingly prepare their favorite meals. Take them anywhere they want to go. All and only because you love them.Come back and see how much they've grown. Watch each boy becoming his own version of a young man. Be in awe with me as we admire how family, friendship, time, and love helped them grow so beautifully over the years.The more I long for you to come back, though, the more I realize that in a way, you never left.I understand now. I know you loved them in every way you could. I know that being their grandma gave you joy and purpose. And of course I know that you can't come back, but I do know that your love for them will always remain. Your love built them and sheltered them in ways that cannot be described. Your love is a big part of who they are and what they will become as they grow. For this, and for every treat and gift, and every time you held them too long or consoled them too much or let them stay up too late, I will always thank you.And I will wish a million times that you could do it all again.This article was written by Tina Plantamura and originally appeared on 04.14.16