We're about to wrap up year three of the COVID-19 pandemic‚ and it's been a weird ride‚ to say the least. These years have been hard‚ frustrating‚ confusing and tragic‚ and yet we keep on keeping on. Except the keeping on part isn't quite as simple as it sounds. Despite the fact that COVID-19 is still wreaking havoc‚ we've sort of collectively decided to move on‚ come what may. This year has been an experiment in normalcy‚ but one without a testable hypothesis or clear design. And it's taken a toll. So many people are feeling tired‚ exhausted‚ worn thin ("like butter scraped over too much bread‚" as Bilbo Baggins put it) these days.But why?Psychologist and speaker Naomi Holdt beautifully explained what's behind the overarching exhaustion people are feeling as we close out 2022‚ and it makes perfect sense.In a post on Facebook‚ she wrote: "A gentle reminder about why you are utterly exhausted… No one I know began this year on a full tank. Given the vicious onslaught of the previous two years (let’s just call it what it was) most of us dragged ourselves across the finish line of 2021… frazzled‚ spent‚ running on aged adrenaline fumes… We crawled into 2022 still carrying shock‚ trauma‚ grief‚ heaviness‚ disbelief… The memories of a surreal existence…And then it began… The fastest hurricane year we could ever have imagined. Whether we have consciously processed it or not‚ this has been a year of more pressure‚ more stress‚ and a race to 'catch up' in all departments… Every. Single. One. Work‚ school‚ sports‚ relationships‚ life… Though not intentionally aware‚ perhaps hopeful that the busier we are‚ the more readily we will forget… the more easily we will undo the emotional tangle… the more permanently we will wipe away the scarring wounds… We can’t. And attempts to re-create some semblance of 'normal' on steroids while disregarding that for almost two years our sympathetic nervous systems were on full alert‚ has left our collective mental health in tatters. Our children and teens are not exempt. The natural byproduct of fighting a hurricane is complete and utter exhaustion… So before you begin questioning the absolutely depleted and wrung-dry state you are in- Pause. Breathe. Remind yourself of who you are and what you have endured. And then remind yourself of what you have overcome. Despite it all‚ you’re still going. (Even on the days you stumble and find yourself face down in a pile of dirt).Understanding brings compassion… Most of the world’s citizens are in need of a little extra TLC at the moment. Most are donning invisible 'Handle with care' posters around their necks and 'Fragile' tattoos on their bodies… Instead of racing to the finish line of this year‚ tread gently. Go slowly. Amidst the chaos‚ find small pockets of silence. Find compassion. Allow the healing. And most of all… Be kind. There’s no human being on earth who couldn’t use just a little bit more of the healing salve of kindness."Putting it like that‚ of course we're exhausted. We're like a person who thinks they're feeling better at the end of an illness so they dive fully back into life‚ only to crash mid-day because their body didn't actually have as much energy as their brain thought it did. We tried to fling ourselves into life‚ desperate to feel normal and make up for lost time‚ without taking the time to fully acknowledge the impact of the past two years or to fully recover and heal from it. Of course‚ life can't just stop‚ but we do need to allow some time for our bodies‚ minds and spirits to heal from what they've been through. The uncertainty‚ the precariousness of "normal‚" the after-effects of everything that upended life as we knew it are real. The grief and trauma of those who have experienced the worst of the pandemic are real. The overwhelm of our brains and hearts as we try to process it all is real. So let's be gentle with one another and ourselves as we roll our harried selves into another new year. We could all use that little extra measure of grace as we strive to figure out what a true and healthy "normal" feels like. You can follow Naomi Holdt on Facebook.This article originally appeared on 12.23.22

Christina Hunger‚ 26‚ is a speech-language pathologist in San Diego‚ California who believes that "everyone deserves a voice." Hunger works with one- and two-year-old children‚ many of which use adaptive devices to communicate. So she wondered what would happen if she taught her two-month-old puppy‚ a Catahoula/Blue Heeler named Stella‚ to do the same. "If dogs can understand words we say to them‚ shouldn't they be able to say words to us? Can dogs use AAC to communicate with humans?" she wondered.Hunger and her fiancé Jake started simply by creating a button that said "outside" and then pressed it every time they said the word or opened the door. After a few weeks‚ every time Hunger said "outside‚" Stella looked at the button. See on Instagram Soon‚ Stella began to step on the button every time she wanted to go outside.They soon added more buttons that say "eat‚" "water‚" "play‚" "walk‚" "no‚" "come‚" "help‚" "bye‚" and "love you.""Every day I spent time using Stella's buttons to talk with her and teach her words just as I would in speech therapy sessions with children‚" she wrote on her blog."Instead of rewarding Stella with a treat for using a button‚ we responded to her communication by acknowledging her message and responding accordingly. Stella's voice and opinions matter just as our own do‚" she continued.If Stella's water bowl is empty‚ she says "water." If she wants to play tug of war‚ she says‚ "play." She even began to tell friends "bye" if they put on their jackets by the door. See on Instagram Stella soon learned to combine different words to make phrases.One afternoon‚ shortly after daylight savings‚ she began saying "eat" at 3:00 pm. When Hunger didn't respond with food‚ she said‚ "love you no" and walked out of the room.Today‚ Stella has learned over 29 words and can combine up to five at a time to make a phrase or sentence."The way she uses words to communicate and the words she's combining is really similar to a 2-year-old child‚" Hunger says of her blog.She believes her work has the potential to transform the bond between humans and dogs."I think how important dogs are to their humans‚" Hunger says. "I just imagine how much deeper the bond will be."Stella asks to play ball outside. See on Instagram Stella clearly wants some more breakfast. See on Instagram After a fun day at the beach‚ Stella wants to go back. See on Instagram Stella telling Hunger that she doesn't want her to leave to work.Login • Instagram See on Instagram Soon‚ Stella began to step on the button every time she wanted to go outside.They soon added more buttons that say "eat‚" "water‚" "play‚" "walk‚" "no‚" "come‚" "help‚" "bye‚" and "love you.""Every day I spent time using Stella's buttons to talk with her and teach her words just as I would in speech therapy sessions with children‚" she wrote on her blog."Instead of rewarding Stella with a treat for using a button‚ we responded to her communication by acknowledging her message and responding accordingly. Stella's voice and opinions matter just as our own do‚" she continued.If Stella's water bowl is empty‚ she says "water." If she wants to play tug of war‚ she says‚ "play." She even began to tell friends "bye" if they put on their jackets by the door. See on Instagram This article originally appeared on 11.08.19

What can we learn from letting seventh graders take the SAT?In the 1960s‚ psychologist Julian Stanley realized that if you took the best-testing seventh graders from around the country and gave them standard college entry exams‚ those kids would score‚ on average‚ about as well as the typical college-bound high school senior. However‚ the seventh graders who scored as well or better than high schoolers‚ Stanley found‚ had off-the-charts aptitude in quantitative‚ logical‚ and spatial reasoning. In other words‚ they were gifted.In the 1970s‚ Stanley and his team launched a full-scale study‚ identifying many of America's gifted kids and tracking them throughout their lives.The study‚ called the Study of Mathematically Precocious Youth never ended and is now nearly 45 years in the making. It has followed countless kids from middle school into their careers as some of America's top politicians‚ scientists‚ CEOs‚ engineers‚ and military leaders.Stanley passed away in the mid-2000s‚ but psychologist David Lubinski helped bring the study to Vanderbilt University in the 1990s‚ where he now co-directs it with Camilla P. Benhow.It's not a stretch to call this the biggest and most in-depth study on intellectual "precociousness." The results of the study thus far are equal parts fascinating and genuinely surprising — a deeply insightful look into the minds and lives of brilliant children.1. Some of what we used to think about gifted kids turned out to be wrong.Ever heard the saying "early to ripe‚ early to rot"? It basically means doing "too much" to foster a kid's special talents and abilities at too young an age could actually cause harm in the long term.That's not even remotely true‚ at least not according to Lubinski.That might be an outdated example. But Lubinksi says there are plenty of other misconceptions still alive today‚ like the idea that gifted kids are so smart that they'll "find a way" to excel even if those smarts aren't nurtured and developed.Not so fast. "They're kids‚" he explains. "They need guidance. We all need guidance."2. Intelligence is not the same as passion.Quick‚ what's the "smartest" career you can think of. Doctor? Scientist?While you do have to be pretty brilliant to work in medicine or science‚ those are far from the only career paths gifted kids choose later in life."Quantitatively‚ gifted people vary widely in their passions‚" Lubinski says. Many of the students in the study did end up pursuing medicine‚ but others went into fields like economics or engineering. Others still were more gifted in areas like logical or verbal reasoning‚ making them excellent lawyers and writers."There are all kinds of ways to express intellectual talent‚" Lubinski explains.When it comes to doing what's best for a gifted student‚ it's just as important for parents and educators to know what the student is passionate about rather than pigeonholing them in traditionally "smart" fields and registering them in a bunch of STEM courses.3. Hard work definitely still matters.Measuring a student's aptitude‚ their natural abilities‚ is only one part of the equation when it comes to determining how successful they'll be in life. Aptitude scores can identify a particularly strong natural skill set but tell us very little about how hard that person might work to excel in that field.Effort‚ Lubinski says‚ is a critical factor in determining how far someone's going to go in life. "If you look at exceptional performers in politics‚ science‚ music‚ and literature‚ they're working many‚ many hours‚" he says.(And for the record‚ there are a lot more important things in life than just career achievement‚ like family‚ friends‚ and overall happiness.)4. Regardless of aptitude‚ every kid deserves to be treated as though they were gifted.The study's focus is specifically on kids within a certain range of intellectual ability‚ but Lubinski is careful to note that many of its findings can and should be applied to all students.For example‚ the kids in the study who were given an opportunity to take more challenging courses that aligned with their skills and interests ultimately went on to accomplish more than the students who were not afforded the same opportunity."You have to find out where your child's development is‚ how fast they learn‚ what are their strengths and relative weaknesses and tailor the curriculum accordingly‚" Lubinski says. "It's what you would want for all kids."It may sound a bit like a pipe dream‚ but it's a great starting point for how we should be thinking about the future of education in America.If you'd like to learn more about the Study of Mathematically Precocious Youth‚ check out this short film on the project created by Vanderbilt University:Quick Learners; High Achievers: Study of Mathematically Precocious YouthThis article originally appeared on 09.22.17

Asexuality is often misunderstood. In general‚ it's believed to be the absence of any romantic interest‚ but asexual identity actually means that a person is not sexually attracted to anyone. Romantic feelings and the strength of those feelings can vary from person to person. Currently‚ about 1% of adults have no interest in sex‚ though some experts believe that number could be higher. For a long time‚ information on asexuality was limited‚ but researchers recently have found information that gives us more knowledge about asexuality. Being asexual can be tough‚ though — just ask the artists from Empathize This.To demonstrate‚ they put together a comic on asexuality‚ defining it as a sexual orientation‚ not a dysfunction:This article originally appeared on 5.16.16

Bullying is a huge problem. According to DoSomething.org‚ 1 in 5 students ages 12-18 in the United States are bullied during the school year‚ and approximately 160‚000 teens have skipped school because of bullying.So when Randy Smalls of South Carolina discovered that his teenage daughter was making fun of a classmate over her clothes and makeup‚ he took swift action.Smalls instantly felt sympathy for Ryan Reese‚ a seventh-grader at Berkeley Middle School‚ having been bullied in his youth. So he took money meant for his daughter and went on a shopping spree with Ryan to get some new clothes and a makeover. Smalls' wife and Ryan's mother Richauna Reese are friends‚ but they weren't aware of the bullying until recently. The families got on the phone after speaking to Ryan‚ and Smalls asked if he could take Ryan to buy new clothes and get a makeover at the beauty salon.Smalls used money initially intended to buy his 13-year-old daughter some new clothes‚ but after learning about her bullying‚ he decided to spend the money on Ryan instead."I say‚ 'When you laugh along‚ you're co-signing the bullying‚" Smalls told Yahoo News."My daughter was upset‚ especially because she is into fashion‚" he said. "So she came with us and helped pick out Ryan's new clothes."While his daughter was at church‚ Smalls took Ryan to the beauty salon and paid for twice-a-month appointments until the end of the year.After hearing about the good gesture‚ local salons have also offered to keep Ryan looking stylish for the next few months.Richauna‚ Ryan's mother‚ told Yahoo News that her daughter was struggling after the recent deaths of her father‚ grandfather‚ and aunt‚ as well as non-epileptic seizures caused by the stress.The shopping trip has helped Ryan immensely. "I wasn't expecting it. I just started to cry. It (the bullying) was really sad for me because I had lost my grandpa‚ father‚ and aunt‚ and it really took me deep down in my depression‚" Ryan explained."This is the first time I have seen a parent take such a stance on bullying‚" Richauna added.Smalls was overwhelmed by the response and says that it's helped his daughter see her mistake."I didn't expect for this to get big but I'm glad if other parents [can learn from it]‚" Smalls said. "My daughter learned her lesson.""As parents‚ we have to take responsibility for what our children do‚" Smalls told ABC's Strahan‚ Sara‚ and Keke. "We can teach our children‚ but when they go and are around other children they can veer off a little bit. When situations like this happen‚ we have to take action and be the parent and not the friend."And the pair seem to be getting along better for the experience. "They're cool now‚" Richauna said.Watch to young girls break down the story in this adorable YouTube video:This article originally appeared on 12.4.19

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The remake comes out very soon!

Guy Fieri is widely beloved for his style and culinary chops‚ but one of his restaurants' landlords has a bone to pick with the Food Network star.