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SciFi and Fantasy
SciFi and Fantasy  
2 yrs

Read an Excerpt From Someone You Can Build a Nest In
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Read an Excerpt From Someone You Can Build a Nest In

Shesheshen has made a mistake fatal to all monsters: she’s fallen in love. We’re thrilled to share an excerpt from Someone You Can Build a Nest In by John Wiswell‚ a creepy‚ charming monster-slaying fantasy romance publishing with DAW on April 2. Shesheshen has made a mistake fatal to all monsters: she’s fallen in love. Shesheshen is a shapeshifter‚ who happily resides as an amorphous lump at the bottom of a ruined manor. When her rest is interrupted by hunters intent on murdering her‚ she constructs a body from the remains of past meals: a metal chain for a backbone‚ borrowed bones for limbs‚ and a bear trap as an extra mouth. However‚ the hunters chase Shesheshen out of her home and off a cliff. Badly hurt‚ she’s found and nursed back to health by Homily‚ a warm-hearted human‚ who has mistaken Shesheshen as a fellow human. Homily is kind and nurturing and would make an excellent co-parent: an ideal place to lay Shesheshen’s eggs so their young could devour Homily from the inside out. But as they grow close‚ she realizes humans don’t think about love that way. Shesheshen hates keeping her identity secret from Homily‚ but just as she’s about to confess‚ Homily reveals why she’s in the area: she’s hunting a shapeshifting monster that supposedly cursed her family. Has Shesheshen seen it anywhere? Eating her girlfriend isn’t an option. Shesheshen didn’t curse anyone‚ but to give herself and Homily a chance at happiness‚ she has to figure out why Homily’s twisted family thinks she did. As the hunt for the monster becomes increasingly deadly‚ Shesheshen must unearth the truth quickly‚ or soon both of their lives will be at risk. And the bigger challenge remains: surviving her toxic in-laws long enough to learn to build a life with‚ rather than in‚ the love of her life.     Each year when Shesheshen hibernated‚ she dreamed of her childhood nest. Oh‚ the warmth of it. A warmth unlike anything in the adult world‚ soft and pliable heat keeping her and her siblings alive. In that warmth‚ they were fed raw life. Her father’s ribs‚ rich in marrow‚ cracking delicately in their mouths‚ and providing the first feast of their lives. His fat deposits were generous‚ and his entrails sheltered them from the cruel winter elements. If Shesheshen could have spent her entire life inside the nest of his remains‚ she would have. But all childhoods end. Hers ended when one of her sisters bit off Shesheshen’s left heel. Her siblings matured too quickly and hungered for more than their father. Shesheshen had to defend herself using jagged fragments of their father’s pelvis—his final and most gracious gift. The assault was a gift from her siblings‚ too‚ for she spent a week dining on their savory carcasses. Mourning wasn’t natural to her. She missed the succulence of her siblings for some time‚ and had the errant moment of nostalgia for sharing their body heat. Little of her prey was memorable. Of her mother‚ she only remembered her wide maw and the artificial steel fangs she’d worn. Still‚ Shesheshen would always miss the nest that her father had made out of himself. He had been a good parent‚ and a better setting. Buy it Now Nothing matched that nest. These ruins were little more than an unloved cave. Where weather had caved in the ceiling‚ ornery spruce trees grew and plugged up the gaps. Poison ivy and spiderwebs were the few decorations‚ overgrowing everything architects had once achieved. Deep beneath the ruins lay an underground hot spring that some aspiring human had connected to a bathing room. Nowadays the chamber was flooded with humid murk‚ gone brackish and amniotic from Shesheshen’s excretions. It was nearly opaque down in the waters. They were a refreshing place to hibernate through winter seasons. Yet noises had roused her prematurely. Her lair had unwelcome visitors again. They did not even wipe their shoes. She heard them before she saw them. The water of the hot spring stretched into so many cracks in the building’s foundations. Sounds from all ends of the property traveled through the network of water‚ alerting Shesheshen when something worse than a bear was coming. “Good gods‚ above and below. Rourke? Do you smell that?” “Yeah. Like death without the sulfur. This is no wyrm.” There were two visitors. Both human men‚ with two feet each‚ trampling over the weeds at her threshold. They paused in the foyer‚ snuffling and fighting with their gorges. Her foyer opened to many hallways‚ and one would lead them to Shesheshen. It was fortunate they didn’t know which one. She had to act before that changed. The one called Rourke said‚ “Malik‚ don’t pass out on me. Put your mask on.” “I’m fine‚” the one called Malik said. “The contract is for a wyrm. Could it be an eastern wyrm? From the Al-Jawi Empire?” “Those smell like burned bread. This just stinks of infection. I’m telling you‚ whatever is in this place isn’t a wyrm.” The one called Malik spat upon the floor. He didn’t clean up after himself. “Then what is it?” The one called Rourke muffled his coughing‚ probably behind a fist. “I’m not sure. But we need priests. At least three of them.” Shesheshen liked priests. They tasted righteous. “Did I hear you two mention priests?” Shesheshen had thought there were two. She was wrong—distracted and foggy-headed from having her hibernation interrupted. Whoever had yelled was a third voice‚ matched by the clank of heavy armor heading into her foyer. She listened carefully around his footfalls; the noise of his gear was cacophonous‚ but she believed this third man was the last. The one called Malik said‚ “Sire Wulfyre‚ from certain environmental details we have reason to believe we need religious assistance—” “For the last time‚” the third man interrupted‚ “my family is not employing the entire region. You said you were experts. Experts don’t need to hire bonus people. That’s the point of expertise. You want priests now? Do you two hunt monsters or just pray at them?” The one called Rourke said‚ “Sire Wulfyre‚ you’re not going to want to come in here yet. The odor is overpowering.” “Don’t tell me what to do. I’ve slain lords. The Wulfyres have killed off wyrms since—” His words dissolved into wet choking sounds. The metal plates of his armor clicked musically‚ as though he was bending over. This third man was definitely retching. She hoped he had a helmet on so it painted the inside. It would serve him right for trespassing. The name ‘Wulfyre’ was familiar‚ too—a family who claimed some ownership over her lair and occasionally sent killers after her. She’d never actually met a Wulfyre before. She was in no mood to meet one now. Rourke said‚ “We warned you about the odor.” Sire Wulfyre said‚ “Next time come outside and warn me. Give me one of your breathing masks.” Malik said‚ “This is sensitive equipment.” Sire Wulfyre said‚ “Equipment my family is paying for. Now find this wyrm and kill it before I go looking for monster hunters who actually hunt.” Listening to all their words was exhausting. They were so noisy for professional killers. Any self-respecting hunters would’ve used the element of surprise. Why‚ if Shesheshen had been cold-blooded enough to kill people as a source of income‚ she would’ve slipped in here while she slept and poisoned the pool with rosemary and lye so she’d die in her sleep. But Shesheshen was not a monster hunter. She was prey. Three armed visitors‚ and she was still weak from hibernation. From the weakness in her flesh‚ she ought not have roused for weeks. Tensing her soft tissues made them tremble as though threatening to liquefy. She didn’t have the strength for a great battle today. She had to do something‚ and soon. These murderers couldn’t be allowed to find her room and corner her. They’d do something awful like set the place on fire or collapse it atop her. She opened pockets in her flesh and took in her first real breath of the season. The air was stale and frigid‚ making it feel as though icicles were forming along her innards. She shuddered‚ using the air to puff out her body‚ and emerged from her pool. Water streamed from the many lumps of her body‚ gone loose from weeks of slumber. The water sloshed across the stone floor‚ until she wholly emerged. All that submersion in water left her flesh sodden. She took a step‚ and collapsed against the nearest wall. It was always tricky‚ getting the hang of being conscious again. Hopefully the monster hunters hadn’t heard that. It would be embarrassing to die in this state. Most bones that she kept inside herself during hibernation digested down to nothing. Her kind did not naturally have many solid internal structures‚ just as the hermit crabs on the north beaches naturally lacked shells. They had to scavenge. Her mother had worn prosthetic steel fangs to compensate when she hunted. That one memory of her mother taught Shesheshen the importance of keeping tools around. Along the floor of the bathing room lay iron rods and dense stones‚ which she’d left out last season. She rolled across them‚ letting them cut through external layers of her flesh with a sting that felt like waking up. Her innards squeezed those rods and stones‚ aligning them into a loose skeletal structure. A steel chain once used to bind her now made an excellent spinal column‚ flexible without breaking when catapults lobbed debris at her. Inside her chest‚ where humans put their lungs‚ she placed an open bear trap. It was her prized skeletal possession. It did not trap bears anymore. Instead‚ she kept it as a secret pair of jaws‚ for when people needed to be bitten. The harder ends of her makeshift bones tore apart her insides‚ and her poor tissues had to generate cartilage and tendons to adjust. It was an ache that left her shuddering against the wall. Was this how getting older felt? Wulfyre was louder now‚ audible through the limestone walls and down her hallway. He hollered‚ “I want the wyrm slain before Mother reaches the countryside. Do you know how upsetting it would be for her to encounter that thing? Of course you can’t. Now you say you don’t even know what it is.” Malik’s voice was softer. Shesheshen had to strain to hear him. “The creature has left many markings in the stone that could be claws or teeth‚ and we haven’t found any droppings yet. We’re still investigating.” “Father died fighting this thing‚ so I can promise you my family knows what it is. It’s a wyrm.” That was a familiar word. Shesheshen had been called a wyrm many times‚ often by startled hunters. She’d also heard drakes‚ harpies‚ qilins‚ kappas‚ and giraffes called wyrms. In her experience‚ it was an epithet for whatever thing greedy humans wanted dead and were too afraid to kill themselves. “Wyrm or not‚” Rourke said‚ “if you really want this thing dead‚ there is only one way to go about it. To purge it and harm it enough to slay it‚ you’re going to need to burn this lair to the ground.” “Oh‚ yes. I’ll just burn a stone building. Thank goodness I hired professional advice.” “It could be tucked anywhere in here. With enough oil‚ fire will find it.” “This place is my family’s ancestral home. Of course you don’t care about the priceless heirlooms being destroyed. But I hired you to bring me the wyrm’s blood. One of you two can read‚ can’t you? It’s in your contract. Mother wants its heart. We can’t exactly bring her a heart that’s burned up.” Malik said‚ “Perhaps we should talk strategy in private.” The Wulfyre kept ranting. “No strategies that include broiling it. If you want to get paid‚ you’re slitting it open over a vase. Mother was very clear: blood‚ not fire.” Well‚ this was interesting. The Wulfyre family was going to be disappointed when they learned she didn’t have blood. She didn’t have one of those pesky mammalian circulatory systems. Rourke said‚ “You’re not paying us enough to die in here.” “Go on‚ then. Breach the contract. Then you’ll be outlaws. Let’s see how much business you get with Mother and L’État Bon hunting you.” Malik whispered like a man who didn’t know how to whisper. “Rourke. Come on. We have rosemary oil. Locals swear it works.” Then there was the rustle of leather being pulled off of blades. Rourke said‚ “How much rosemary do we have?” That made Shesheshen grip the limestone bricks of her wall. These people had rosemary oil? She cursed out of multiple orifices. These monster hunters had done their research. One of the things she couldn’t tolerate was rosemary. Once a local girl had candied it and fooled her into eating it‚ and Shesheshen pissed bile for a week. As it was‚ her flesh struggled to keep her aloft on her makeshift bones. She needed to eat and gather strength. A fight would not go pleasantly. The last thing she wanted to wake up to was dying. Getting older had given her wiles. While the humans chatted about how best to kill her‚ she went through some growing pains and formed two relatively passable legs. She hobbled for a while‚ convincing herself that these knees and ankles mostly worked. On a rack beside the door was a set of wigs she’d made from the scalps that people hadn’t been using anymore. She selected a wig of sooty black hair for her disguise. Then she added a red riding hood; it was a leftover possession of a bygone occupant of the lair‚ from back when this building had been a castle or brothel or whatever humans enjoyed. As her innards churned to form an esophageal passage‚ she wrapped the red garment around herself‚ pulling the hood low to hide how little of a face she had. It was an old role. By shifting her body mass within the cloak‚ she gave the illusion of a lithe frame. The belled-out bottom of the cloak gave her plenty of room to hide most of her body mass. She had passed as a human on plenty of excursions when she was at full strength. Doing so depleted from hibernation was a gamble. Shesheshen pushed downward on the door as she opened it‚ so that the wooden door scraped along the stone landing. The sound stung her ears‚ and if it bothered her‚ it was likely to make these men soil themselves. Part of the plot was announcing herself in advance. She ran with wet feet slapping the floor‚ loud as she could be. They would know something was headed in their direction‚ and they would be ready for a nightmare. What they got was a girl’s harried face poking out from under a red riding hood‚ gloved hands flailing. She turned as frightened a face as she could on them—it was easy to make‚ since they made three frightened faces at her. All three of the murderers she’d eavesdropped upon stood in her foyer. Two of them wore practical leather gear and chain mail‚ with awkward half-masks over their mouths and noses. One man was much younger‚ shaped like a barrel that had grown arms‚ with several jeweled piercings in his ears. The other was a withered old root of a man with tufts of gray hair sticking out of every spot on his uniform‚ and eyes the green of pine needles. These two must have been Malik and Rourke‚ standing in front‚ each holding polearms with their blades pointed down the hall at her. They protected the third man. The third man hid behind them‚ wearing golden plate armor all the way up to his throat. Who wore gold for defense? It wasn’t holy‚ it was terribly heavy‚ and it was one of the softest metals Shesheshen had ever bitten. His chestplate was molded to have the likeness of nipples and rippling abdominal muscles. Parts of her salivated at the thought of crushing that chestplate. At his hip‚ he held some kind of crossbow at a bad angle‚ more likely to hit one of his underlings than her. Well‚ it was easy to pick out which one was Wulfyre. Shesheshen said‚ “Sires and masters. Thank the good gods‚ above and below‚ that you came. The wyrm could wake at any moment. Please‚ keep your voices quiet or we’ll all be skinned alive.” She kept her own voice soft‚ since a whisper was easier to fake than a full-throated human voice. It took quite some concentration to keep a vocal passage open and functional like this. It would be easier once she consumed one from a person. Perhaps one of the hunters would donate. The older hunter‚ Rourke‚ lowered his polearm. “What are you doing here‚ lass? The townsfolk said no one has approached this lair in years.” “Sire‚” Shesheshen said. “The wyrm has kept me in darkness so long that I have no memory of when it kidnapped me. It held me in one of the lower chambers of this place.” The younger hunter‚ Malik‚ made a holy sign in front of himself‚ then asked‚ “It held you?” Rourke said‚ “I thought anyone abducted by this thing would’ve been consumed before it went to hibernate.” Well‚ the old hunter was right about that. Shesheshen never left food in the cupboard before hibernation. If you did‚ the remains spoiled and attracted scavengers. Scavengers were a nuisance when you were trying to regenerate. She mimicked Malik’s holy sign with one hand‚ then resumed clutching her cloak. For some reason‚ clutching at clothing was a classic human sign of being pathetic. In her experience‚ clothing never ran away from you even when a monster literally ate your head. “Sires‚ the wyrm spares my life for my songs. It can only slumber when I sing to it the dark songs of distant lands. I know not where these verses come from‚ and they chill me to my core. Yet if it wakes‚ it will destroy the village with its ravenous appetite.” “Your squeaky voice?” said the man in gold‚ definitely Wulfyre. “I guess a hellbound monster would have shitty taste in music.” Both monster hunters shot glares at their employer. Yet those glares were gone before Wulfyre saw them. Hedged sincerity. A classic human trait. Malik asked‚ “What is your name‚ madame?” Shesheshen pondered. “Roislin.” It was a plausible Engmarese name. Someone she’d eaten had probably had it. Rourke said‚ “Roislin. My name is Eoghan Rourke‚ and this is my partner‚ Nasser Akkad Malik. Our employer here is Catharsis Wulfyre‚ son of the Baroness. We have seen so much pain that monsters have created in this world. Nobody should be left alone with a beast so unholy and wretched. Come with us. We’ve got water and honeycomb in our wagon. Right‚ Malik?” “That’s right‚” Malik said‚ holding out a hand for her. “We’ll get you out of here. You’ll be in town by tomorrow.” Town was the last place she wanted to go. It was full of wretched humans‚ precisely the kind that hired monster hunters in the first place. What she needed was rest and isolation. Adding more squeak to her voice‚ she said‚ “Sires‚ if we flee together‚ then the wyrm will be on us before we reach the second hill. She knows my scent above all at this point. Instead‚ I need you to retrieve me a weapon.” Wulfyre was the one to say‚ “A weapon?” “Please. On the northernmost island of Engmar‚ in the west‚ there grows a flowering plant that the locals call summoner’s jaw. It is the only herb the beast fears. It can rend her skin and make her husk wither. A curse from the good gods‚ above and below. If you can collect it‚ I can keep her slumbering until you return‚ and we can be free.” Actually‚ she was not even mildly allergic to summoner’s jaw. Merchants called it a remedy for minor cuts and bruises. However‚ Engmar was multiple nations away. By the time these would-be murderers finished their trip‚ she would be fully rested‚ fed‚ and ready to deal with them. If she got lucky‚ they’d spread the rumor of her one weakness so that later hunters would make the same mistake. Malik said‚ “I’ve heard of summoner’s jaw. It’s used for medicinal purposes. Stands to reason that devils would be weak to medicine.” Rourke lowered his mask‚ then unstrapped his bowl helmet and held it over his chest. “Roislin‚ I am also from Engmar. I have traveled the world many years‚ and seen many cultures. To stay in this cave‚ singing a monster to sleep‚ in the hopes we will find its bane? You are the bravest hero I have ever encountered.” “Fuck off.” Catharsis Wulfyre barged between the two monster hunters‚ causing Rourke to drop his helmet. It clanged off the floor‚ and Wulfyre kicked it so that it skidded out through the entrance of the lair. “I’m not riding around the countryside until my ball hairs turn gray looking for magic weeds. Mother is paying you to kill the thing this week. It cannot be alive when she arrives.” Malik said‚ “Sire‚ this herb is the key to slaying your monster.” “You don’t hire locksmiths to find a key. You hire them to pick open the lock‚” Wulfyre said‚ spinning the cap off a jug as he went. He doused his breastplate and gauntlets in a viscous fluid. It puddled beneath him‚ on the floor at the end of the hallway. “Tie this girl up. Let’s go.” Rourke paused in the pursuit of his helmet. “Tie her up? She’s an innocent.” “She’s one of those virgins that wyrms love eating so much. On top of that‚ we know the monster likes her voice. It’ll crawl out of its shithole if we have the right bait. That bait isn’t a plant. Bait needs to squirm.” Wulfyre bustled along the hall‚ coming straight for Shesheshen. The oil from the jug dulled the shine of his armor. Malik raced after him‚ grabbing the man’s gold-plated bicep. Malik said‚ “Wait‚ wait. There has to be another way.” From the exit‚ Rourke said‚ “We’re in over our heads here. Unidentifiable monster. Unfamiliar ground. We need whatever advantages we can get to kill it.” Malik said‚ “Like the summoner’s jaw.” Wulfyre held up his gauntleted fingers‚ oil dripping between them. “We don’t need summoner’s jaw when we already know rosemary works on the thing. It’s not going to eat me with this much of the stuff.” This had to slow down. Shesheshen tried to shrink into the adjacent hallway‚ while pushing a few of the sharper stones inside her body toward the surface‚ readying claws. “Sires‚ your voices. If you rouse the monster‚ no one will be safe.” Wulfyre batted Malik’s hand away. “My family has slain wyrms this way for generations. Leave a useless commoner out where the monster can smell them‚ and when the monster comes out for a snack‚ we get the drop on it. Slit this thing’s belly‚ get the blood‚ and you two can spend the rest of your lives trying to spend all the money you just made.” Malik’s feet slowed. He wasn’t chasing his employer anymore. “No.” Wulfyre said‚ “My family is paying. I’m giving the orders‚ or you’re becoming wanted men. Which would you prefer?” How Shesheshen wanted one of the hunters to stop this. For one of them to stand up for common sense‚ if not for the rights of a young damsel. A damsel who had offered them a perfectly good reason to get lost for a few weeks. But humans never stood up for the right thing. They stood around feeling uncomfortable‚ and later pretended that feeling uncomfortable meant they were virtuous. Now Malik stood to one side‚ only slightly obstructing Wulfyre’s path. Surely he’d feel awful about this tomorrow when he was spending his blood money‚ before running off with his partner to the next kill. And they called her monstrous. There was a way to salvage this without fighting them and getting killed. She started‚ “Sires‚ perhaps there is summoner’s jaw in Underlook Forest‚ to the south of here. It is where Papa and I first made sight of the monster‚ and Papa said he thought he saw its peculiar color in the brush. It could be why the monster so seldom hunts there. Less than a day’s travel. You could—” Catharsis Wulfyre’s hand felt like winter had abruptly returned and fallen exclusively over Shesheshen’s face. His gauntlet dug into her flesh‚ squeezing her mouth closed. He said‚ “That’ll shut her up. Get some chains.” Worse than the metal or his strength was the chilling burn. While Shesheshen had no sense of smell‚ her flesh tasted the rosemary‚ making her hide bubble up‚ boils rising everywhere the oil made contact. Her eyes fled deep inside her head to protect from that hideous pain. It was so awful that the urge to vomit overcame her. She opened up her throat and chest cavity‚ and vomited the wide-open bear trap at him. It clanged shut‚ the noise echoing throughout the hallway‚ cutting off Wulfyre’s shriek—as well as his right hand. Her bear trap had been too enthusiastic‚ biting straight through gold and bone alike‚ severing his hand between its jaws. Wulfyre clutched at his mangled forearm. “Fuck! Fucking gods‚ help me!” Shesheshen spat the trap and hand away‚ not wanting another taste of rosemary. Every spot where the rosemary oil had scalded her continued to crack and corrupt. She had to tear the skin off her own face and neck‚ screeching as she forcibly shed onto the floor. Stray juices poured from the wounds. Pain made her lose coherence‚ so that the bonerods in her body jutted out and punctured her hide‚ knocking bricks from the walls in her flailing. She hoped she beheaded one of these damned self-important mammals. By the time she could see clearly again‚ Rourke was gone. He’d fled as fast as a ghost that smelled reason in the air. Malik remained‚ bobbing around Wulfyre‚ trying to wrap cloth around the stump of the man’s arm as he guided his employer to the exit. It was a gusher of a wound‚ painting the floor with rich crimson. Catharsis Wulfyre kicked one boot between Malik’s legs‚ snagged a knee‚ and tripped him to the floor. Malik went straight down‚ his skull making a heavy report against the stone floor. Wulfyre stepped over his fallen henchman and kept going for the sunlight of the exit. He kept his mauled arm elevated‚ left hand trying to squeeze metal plates and apply some pressure. Gore still streamed out‚ painting his expensive armor with his own insides. “Mother will come for you‚ you fish-drowner! You’re going to be a trophy!” In the middle of his cursing‚ he stepped on a puddle of rosemary he’d left on the floor when he’d decided to baste himself. One heavy boot landed with a mild splish sound. Before he could raise the other leg in stride‚ he slipped. All several hundred pounds of man and gear veered across the corner of the hall‚ and he went straight down on his back. Then there were two unwanted people on Shesheshen’s floor. She let strands of her flesh dangle free of the cloak‚ the ends dragging on the floor until they found stones. She braced herself with the rods inside them. The stones served as decent feet‚ but could be repurposed into flails. Her bulk swelled with each step‚ lumbering over the two intruders. She was fantasizing about cracking Wulfyre’s armor like the shell of a lobster when he reached down with his remaining hand. Before she could leap on him‚ there was the thunking sound of his crossbow. The bolt hit her high in the chest‚ near where the bear trap had been lodged. Now that was all raw tissue‚ so soft that the bolt pierced deeply through her innards. Its tip pricked the hide of her back. Wulfyre said‚ “Right in your heart.” Much as she didn’t have blood‚ she did not have a heart. She looked forward to ingesting this man’s soon enough. She grabbed the end of the crossbow bolt‚ which was unusually thick. A jerk did nothing to free it‚ and gave her seven smaller stings‚ where hooks from the bolt must have lodged inside her. She commanded her inner tissues to relax and release it. Instead‚ they went feverishly rigid. Her meat seized up and refused to obey her. It was going to be a nuisance digging that thing out of herself. She needed to get her strength up. Fortunately‚ she had these two humans over for breakfast. “Not today!” It was the rusty voice of the elder monster hunter‚ Rourke. The old man ran into the hall with a torch burning orange in the air. He waved it wildly as he came at her. “About time‚” said Wulfyre‚ trying and failing to roll to his knees. That armor looked disgustingly heavy. He raised his arms at Rourke. “Get me out of here.” Rourke ran to Wulfyre—then past him‚ and to Malik. He caught the younger man under the armpits‚ holding the torch in front of both of their bodies as he lugged him to the exit. They were both lucky that she was still getting her footing and fighting this contraption lodged in her chest. They would escape. While Catharsis Wulfyre bellowed about broken contracts and what he’d do to their testicles‚ Shesheshen straightened up. If those monster hunters returned with proper weaponry‚ she needed to be ready. She formed two thick tentacles and wrapped them around the base of the crossbow bolt. Jerking it made her knees weaken‚ and half her frame quivered from the pain. It hurt like a week of starvation jammed into one instant. What had they poisoned her with? Wulfyre tried to sit up‚ and his ornate breastplate stopped him. That was what he got for wearing golden armor in the likeness of abdominals. Still he sneered up at her. He turned those strong cheekbones and his blond stubble up at her and said‚ “At least you’re dying with me. The Wulfyres never forget.” Those were not the words of a worthy father. They were the words of breakfast.   Excerpted from Someone You Can Build a Nest In‚ copyright © 2024 by John Wiswell.
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Fun Facts And Interesting Bits
Fun Facts And Interesting Bits
2 yrs

WIZARDS The Podcast Guide To Comics | Episode 86.5
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WIZARDS The Podcast Guide To Comics | Episode 86.5

We address the recent kerfuffle with Rob Liefeld on social media‚ calling out Gareb Shamus for spreading nonsense in his recent interview with us. Plus we review Superman For All Seasons‚ call shenanigans on this CONTINUE READING... The post WIZARDS The Podcast Guide To Comics | Episode 86.5 appeared first on The Retro Network.
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Daily Signal Feed
Daily Signal Feed
2 yrs

Trump’s Lawyers Accuse Jack Smith of Concealing Evidence‚ Working With Biden Admin
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Trump’s Lawyers Accuse Jack Smith of Concealing Evidence‚ Working With Biden Admin

Former President Donald Trump’s lawyers alleged Tuesday night that special counsel Jack Smith concealed evidence about his office’s collaboration with the Biden administration. In a 68-page Wednesday filing in the Florida case concerning his handling of concealed documents‚ Trump’s legal team claimed it obtained heavily redacted documents through a Freedom of Information Act request revealing “politically motivated operatives in the Biden Administration and the National Archives and Records Administration” have been involved in pushing the classified documents probe since 2021. Trump’s lawyers asked the judge to require Smith to produce any “additional evidence of bias and political animus‚” writing that the documents obtained through FOIA “should have been disclosed by the Office‚ in unredacted form‚ at the outset of the case.” “The Special Counsel’s Office has disregarded basic discovery obligations and [Justice Department] policies in an effort to support the Biden Administration’s egregious efforts to weaponize the criminal justice system in pursuit of an objective that President [Joe] Biden cannot achieve on the campaign trail: slowing down President Trump’s leading campaign in the 2024 presidential election‚” the filing alleges. “The patent absurdity of the Office’s efforts is illustrated by the fact that‚ while working toward a historic landslide victory in the Iowa caucuses yesterday‚ President Trump was also preparing to bring to Your Honor’s attention today the record of misrepresentations and discovery violations that have marred this case from the outset and illustrate that the Office has disregarded fundamental fairness and its legal obligations in favor of partisan election interference.” Trump’s attorneys tonight in classified docs case file bombshell motion for discovery—again insists Special Counsel Jack Smith is concealing evidence including voluminous records demonstrating collaboration btw Biden White House‚ NARA‚ DOJ‚ FBI‚ and intel agencies: pic.twitter.com/cXr9endnj5— Julie Kelly ?? (@julie_kelly2) January 17‚ 2024 The details from the FOIA request “add force to President Trump’s long-held position regarding the scope of the prosecution team‚” his lawyers claimed. “The FOIA releases‚ coupled with other evidence scattered throughout more than 1.2 million pages of discovery‚ reflect close participation in the investigation by NARA and Biden Administration components such as the White House Counsel’s Office‚ as well as senior officials at DOJ and FBI‚” they wrote. “These revelations are disturbing but not surprising.” The filing notes that Trump will also “dispute at trial the contentions by the Special Counsel’s Office that Mar-a-Lago was not secure and that there was a risk that materials stored at those premises could be compromised.” Specific disclosures requested by Trump’s team include any communications by members of Smith’s team with the Biden administration‚ communications between the Biden administration and Fulton County prosecutors‚ evidence of bias in the intelligence community‚ and evidence of “improper coordination” with NARA‚ among others. The Special Counsel’s Office did not immediately respond to a request for comment. Originally published by the Daily Caller News Foundation Have an opinion about this article? To sound off‚ please email letters@DailySignal.com‚ and we’ll consider publishing your edited remarks in our regular “We Hear You” feature. Remember to include the URL or headline of the article plus your name and town and/or state. The post Trump’s Lawyers Accuse Jack Smith of Concealing Evidence‚ Working With Biden Admin appeared first on The Daily Signal.
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2 yrs

If You Insist Men Can Give Birth‚ We Likely Know What You Think About Hamas
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If You Insist Men Can Give Birth‚ We Likely Know What You Think About Hamas

If you say “men give birth‚” we all know your position on Hamas. Now‚ why is that? Why‚ if a person says “men give birth” or says that men who say they are women should be allowed to compete in women’s sports‚ can we be virtually certain that the person sides with Hamas in its war to eradicate Israel? Theoretically‚ the two claims—that men as well as women give birth and Israel is the villain in its war against Hamas—have absolutely no connection. But they do—for two reasons. Reason No. 1: When people have a distorted moral value system‚ that distortion applies to just about every issue. Just as a broken compass will almost always point in the wrong direction‚ a broken moral compass will do the same. However‚ to be more precise‚ people who say “men give birth” and who side with Hamas‚ i.e.‚ progressives and leftists—liberals don’t believe men give birth or side with Hamas—do not merely have a broken moral compass. They have a moral compass that works in the way progressives and leftists have configured it: North always points south and east always points west. Some examples of how the progressive compass works: Women who object to men who say they are women competing in women’s sports—even in weightlifting—are haters and bigots (“transphobes”). The men who compete against them are heroes. Adults who object to schools’ sponsoring drag queen performances for 6-year-olds are haters and bigots (“transphobes”). The teachers who take children to drag queen events are progressive‚ compassionate and open-minded. If a 9-year-old girl says she is a boy‚ the only therapists she is allowed to see are those who engage in “gender affirmation‚” which is‚ of course‚ a left-wing Orwellian term. The one thing these therapists do not do is affirm the actual gender of the child. All-black dorms on college campuses are anti-racist. Objecting to racially segregated dorms is racist. Those who want to build walls or fences to prevent millions of people from illegally entering the country are xenophobic. Those who oppose building such barriers and declare their cities “sanctuary cities” are humanitarians. Demanding that citizens show a voter ID before being allowed to vote—the norm in virtually every democracy in the world—constitutes “voter suppression.” If we have fewer police officers‚ we will have safer cities. Marriage is a product of patriarchal misogyny. It wasn’t created to protect and honor women‚ but to exploit them. Anyway‚ a woman needs a man as much as a fish needs a bicycle. Scientists who express skepticism about catastrophic man-made global warming are “science deniers.” These are some of the morally and factually perverse positions of the Left. Just about every individual who holds these positions also holds the morally perverse position that Israel is the villain and Hamas and its Palestinian supporters are the moral party. The converse is also true: With the exception of Muslims‚ those who are anti-Israel also tend to believe that men give birth and the other examples of left-wing moral chaos. Few Muslims—certainly no religious ones—believe that men give birth or that children should be taken to drag queen shows. They just want Israel destroyed. Reason No. 2: People who say that men give birth also say that Israel is the villain because these positions emanate from the same aim; namely‚ the destruction of Western civilization‚ beginning with the destruction of the West’s moral and social norms. When people say that men give birth and that men can compete in women’s sports‚ they are seeking to undo the bases of Western civilization—truth‚ science and the belief that we live in an ordered universe. That is why the Left is so adamant about denying that sex (“gender”) is binary. The fact that there are only two sexes represents order—natural and‚ worse‚ divine. Those on the Left unwittingly acknowledge the connection between their anti-Western positions and their Israel-hatred. They routinely attack Israel for being an “outpost of Western civilization.” That is precisely what Israel is‚ which tells you a great deal about both of Israel’s enemies—the Left and much of the Muslim world. COPYRIGHT 2024 CREATORS.COM The Daily Signal publishes a variety of perspectives. Nothing written here is to be construed as representing the views of The Heritage Foundation. Have an opinion about this article? To sound off‚ please email letters@DailySignal.com and we’ll consider publishing your edited remarks in our regular “We Hear You” feature. Remember to include the url or headline of the article plus your name and town and/or state. The post If You Insist Men Can Give Birth‚ We Likely Know What You Think About Hamas appeared first on The Daily Signal.
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2 yrs

No Crisis at Border‚ Biden Says
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No Crisis at Border‚ Biden Says

President Joe Biden—wearing a brown leather jacket and a black baseball hat—walked out onto the South Lawn of the White House on Saturday morning on his way to Marine One. He was flying to Camp David for the weekend. But first he stopped to talk to some reporters. “Mr. President‚” one of them asked‚ “would you call the situation on the southern border a ‘crisis’?” “No‚” said Biden‚ according to the White House transcript‚ “but I wish they would react. I’ve been pushing them—my Republican colleagues—since I got into office. I think we have to make major changes at the border. I’ve been pushing it. I’m prepared to make significant alterations at the border. And there are negotiations going on for the last five weeks‚ so I’m hopeful we’ll get there.” Another reporter asked Biden if he was willing to take “executive action when it comes to the border to address the border crisis if Republican don’t pass more funding?” “Well‚ Republicans have to pass funding‚” Biden said. “They have to—I’ve read one Republican said‚ ‘We don’t want our border [inaudible] it’ll only help Biden.’ “I’ve been pushing for fundamental change on the border for a long time—a long time‚” said Biden. “And so‚ I’m hopeful. I’m going to let those negotiations play out. But other than that‚ I’m going to take action myself.” Ten days before Biden had this exchange with reporters‚ House Speaker Mike Johnson‚ R-La.‚ took a group of more than 60 House Republicans to visit the U.S.-Mexico border at Eagle Pass‚ Texas. As these members of Congress gave a press conference there—on the banks of the Rio Grande—a group of illegal aliens began crossing the river behind them. As recorded by CSPAN‚ one reporter mentioned this to House Judiciary Chairman Jim Jordan as he took his turn at the podium. Jordan‚ R-Ohio‚ expressed no surprise. Some reporters moved behind the members of Congress to record the illegal aliens as they came into the United States. KSAT-TV‚ an ABC affiliate based in San Antonio‚ was one news organization that caught video of them. “A family of five migrants was captured by KSAT photojournalist Gavin Nesbitt crossing the Rio Grande Wednesday as U.S. House Speaker Mike Johnson and other congressional Republicans held a nearby press conference about immigration‚” the TV station reported on its website. “The two adults and three children could be seen from the staging area of the press conference crossing into Eagle Pass‚ Texas‚ from Mexico‚” the station said. “Border Patrol agents called out to the migrants in Spanish to tell them to turn around.” “Once the family set foot in the United States‚” KSAT reported‚ “the agents gave water to the children‚ who were in pajamas. Then‚ they loaded the family up in a van.” Is Biden right that there is no crisis at the border? Or was it profoundly symbolic of that very crisis that as the speaker of the House and other members of Congress were holding a press conference at the border‚ people were illegally crossing it right behind them? In fiscal 2020—the last full fiscal year when President Donald Trump was in office—the Border Patrol encountered 405‚036 aliens trying to illegally cross into the United States between ports of entry‚ according to data published by U.S. Customs and Border Protection. In fiscal 2021‚ when Biden came into office‚ that number jumped. “Total [Border Patrol] encounters rose markedly to nearly 1.7 million encounters in FY 2021‚ the highest number ever recorded at that time‚” the Congressional Research Service said in a report published May 16. “In FY 2022‚ the U.S. Border Patrol (USBP) encountered more than 2.2 million foreign nationals (aliens) crossing into the United States illegally between ports of entry‚ the largest number in its history‚” the report said. In fiscal 2023‚ according to the data published by Customs and Border Protection‚ the Border Patrol encountered another 2‚063‚692 aliens illegally crossing into the United States between ports of entry. That is a 244% increase from the 405‚036 illegal aliens the Border Patrol encountered during Trump’s last full fiscal year in office. Included in this surge were children who came here without their parents. “Unaccompanied alien children‚” the Congressional Research Service said in a report published last June 28‚ “are statutorily defined as minors under 18 who possess neither lawful U.S. immigration status nor a parent or legal guardian in the United States immediately available to provide care and physical custody.” “Since early 2021‚” the CRS report said‚ “annual encounters involving unaccompanied alien children (UC‚ unaccompanied children) at the U.S.-Mexico border by the Department of Homeland Security’s (DHS’s) U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) have remained at record-high levels.” “Since February 2021‚” the report said‚ “UC encounters have consistently exceeded 8‚500 per month‚ higher than any period since CBP began publishing statistics.” As this column has noted before‚ the Border Patrol in recent years has also encountered a growing number of individuals on the terrorist watchlist trying to illegally cross the U.S.-Mexico border between ports of entry. That number increased from just three in fiscal 2020 to 169 in fiscal 2023. In other words‚ about 56 times as many individuals on the terrorist watchlist were caught trying to sneak across the U.S.-Mexico border in fiscal 2023 as in fiscal 2020. Is that because Biden has done a better job securing the border than Trump? Or is it because Biden has presided over a crisis at our border that threatens the security of this country? COPYRIGHT 2024 CREATORS.COM The Daily Signal publishes a variety of perspectives. Nothing written here is to be construed as representing the views of The Heritage Foundation. Have an opinion about this article? To sound off‚ please email letters@DailySignal.com‚ and we’ll consider publishing your edited remarks in our regular “We Hear You” feature. Remember to include the URL or headline of the article plus your name and town and/or state. The post No Crisis at Border‚ Biden Says appeared first on The Daily Signal.
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2 yrs

Abbott Halts Migrant Buses From Texas to Illinois‚ But Not Because of Pritzker's Whining
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Abbott Halts Migrant Buses From Texas to Illinois‚ But Not Because of Pritzker's Whining

Abbott Halts Migrant Buses From Texas to Illinois‚ But Not Because of Pritzker's Whining
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2 yrs

Too Fun to Check: Did Fani Willis Pay Other Prosecutors Less Than Alleged Boyfriend?
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Too Fun to Check: Did Fani Willis Pay Other Prosecutors Less Than Alleged Boyfriend?

Too Fun to Check: Did Fani Willis Pay Other Prosecutors Less Than Alleged Boyfriend?
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2 yrs

US Army Not So Hep About Woke 'Two Mom'-Type Recruiting Stories Suddenly
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US Army Not So Hep About Woke 'Two Mom'-Type Recruiting Stories Suddenly

US Army Not So Hep About Woke 'Two Mom'-Type Recruiting Stories Suddenly
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2 yrs

Haley's Debate Boycott Hypocrisy
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Haley's Debate Boycott Hypocrisy

Haley's Debate Boycott Hypocrisy
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2 yrs

Tusk Tells The Tale Of Huge Journey Made By A Woolly Mammoth 14‚000 Years Ago
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Tusk Tells The Tale Of Huge Journey Made By A Woolly Mammoth 14‚000 Years Ago

Using little more than a tusk‚ scientists have pieced together the lifetime travels of a single woolly mammoth that wandered North America more than 14‚000 years ago.Starting life in the western Yukon‚ the mammoth traveled hundreds of kilometers through northwestern Canada before arriving at her final resting place‚ an early human settlement in present-day Alaska. It seems there’s little doubt that this venturing mammoth was slaughtered by a hungry group of hunter-gatherers. The international team of researchers from McMaster University‚ the University of Alaska Fairbanks‚ and the University of Ottawa chronicled the epic journey by studying a mammoth tusk using ancient DNA and isotopic analyses. Isotope analysis relies on the principle of “you are what you eat.” The technique is capable of providing precise insights into an animal's life – such as their diet‚ geographic origin‚ and migration patterns – by looking at the concentration of certain stable isotopes within their tissues that were picked up from their surrounding environment.The complete tusk belonged to a woolly mammoth that was recently named “Élmayuujey’eh”. It was unearthed alongside remains of a juvenile and a baby mammoth at Swan Point‚ an archaeological site that’s home to the earliest evidence of humans in Alaska. Sina Beleka‚ a postdoctoral researcher at the McMaster Ancient DNA Centre and co-author of the study‚ examines a sample.Image credit: Sidney Roth/McMaster UniversityThe analysis of the tusk showed that the mammoth was an adult female who was around 20 years old when she died some 14‚000 years ago. This was a critical window of time when the last remaining woolly mammoths lived alongside the region’s first human inhabitants for at least 1‚000 years.The mammoth spent much of her life in a relatively small area of the Yukon. However‚ as she grew older‚ she migrated over 1‚000 kilometers (621 miles) in just three years before settling in the midst of Alaska. Altogether‚ this information strongly suggests that the mammoth was killed by human hunter-gatherers. “She was a young adult in the prime of life. Her isotopes showed she was not malnourished and that she died in the same season as the seasonal hunting camp at Swan Point where her tusk was found‚” Matthew Wooller‚ senior author‚ director of the Alaska Stable Isotope Facility‚ and a professor at the University of Alaska Fairbanks‚ said in a statement.     The researchers think it’s a reasonable bet that the two young mammoths found near her remains were her children. It’s believed mammoths behave much like modern elephants‚ with females and young-uns living in close-knit matriarchal herds and mature males traveling solo.Significantly‚ the remains of mammoths have been found at three other archaeological sites within just 10 kilometers (6.2 miles) of Swan Point. This led the researchers to conclude that this region was a meet-up point for at least two closely related‚ but different herds.“This is more than looking at stone tools or remains and trying to speculate. This analysis of lifetime movements can really help with our understanding of how people and mammoths lived in these areas‚” added Tyler Murchie‚ a recent postdoctoral researcher at McMaster University's Department of Anthropology.The study is published in the journal Science Advances.
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