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Communism Only Killed 100 Million People. It’s Time We Give It Another Try.
NEW YORK—Listen up, New Yorkers: I know the headlines are screaming about Zohran Mamdani’s double-digit lead in the mayoral polls, with the general election just two weeks away on November 4. But let’s cut through the capitalist noise—Zohran isn’t just running a campaign; he’s launching a revolution wrapped in a rent-freeze bow. And honestly? With communism’s track record of only 100 million casualties last century, it’s high time we roll the dice again. This time, we’ll do it right—in the city that never sleeps, because we’ll have seized the bodegas for equitable 24/7 falafel distribution.
Look, Zohran’s my kind of comrade: a 33-year-old DSA firebrand from Astoria who’s already crushed Andrew Cuomo in the Democratic primary by 12 points, ranked-choice magic and all. While Cuomo’s out there fumbling his independent comeback like a scandal-plagued rerun, Zohran’s platform is straight fire—free city buses, a rent freeze on stabilized units, 200,000 new affordable homes, and get this: city-run grocery stores in every borough to smash those predatory prices. It’s not just democratic socialism; it’s Communism Lite, with a side of universal childcare and $30-an-hour minimum wage by 2030. No more choosing between rent and ramen—under Mayor Mamdani, you’ll get the ramen from the state, comrade.
The skeptics? Please. They’re the same folks clutching their pearls over Zohran’s past tweets about defunding the NYPD, even as he smartly pivots to “work with police” while beefing up social workers for real safety. (Pro tip: Gulags had social workers too—they just called them interrogators.) And yeah, billionaires like Bill Ackman are threatening to drop hundreds of millions to stop him, because nothing says “free market” like rigging an election with hedge-fund cash. But Zohran’s already wooing the moderates: closed-door chats with cops on retention, schmoozing with megadonors like Robert Wolf, and promising to only kill half of the city through famine. This isn’t your dusty old hammer-and-sickle; it’s intersectional, with solar panels and a blockchain for tracking those collective beet vouchers.
Sure, history’s got that pesky 100-million-dead footnote—Stalin’s purges, Mao’s leaps into famine—but those were rookie mistakes. Zohran’s got Albany lobbying skills (he’s sponsored 20 bills already) and a vision that scales: tax the billionaires, build the housing, end the ICE nightmares for immigrants. Trump’s even threatening to arrest him over “illegal” smears if he blocks deportations as mayor—talk about a glowing endorsement! Worst case? A few awkward bread lines in Brooklyn. Best case? Utopia: no more $7 lattes under capitalism’s boot, just state-approved oat milk for all, and group chats nationalized for maximum equity.
So, NYC, on November 4, vote Zohran. Let’s give communism that fresh start it deserves—right here, where the subways run on vibes and vengeance. Who’s ready to seize the means of production… or at least the next mayoral term?
The post Communism Only Killed 100 Million People. It’s Time We Give It Another Try. appeared first on Genesius Times.
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