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TikTok user alexxx1915 recently posted a short video with the caption: "I just learned the term 'living room family' and I never understood why my kids never played in their rooms when I always did as a kid."She briefly shows her kids hanging out in the living room with their pet dog and some toys scattered around the floor, before panning to her own face and giving a sort of sentimental look. The simple, ten-second clip struck a huge nerve with parents, racking up over 25 million views and thousands of heartfelt comments. @alexxx1915 #livingroomfamily #fypシ What are "living room families" and "bedroom families"?This idea has been going around for a while on social media.Simply put, a living room family is a family that congregates in the living room, or any common space in the household. Kids play in the same space where the adults relax — and things are often messy, as a result. Everyone interacts with each other and spends lots of time together. Bedrooms are reserved mostly for sleeping and dressing.A bedroom family, on the other hand, is where the kids spend more time in their rooms. They play there, watch TV, and maybe even eat meals. Typically, the main rooms of the house are kept neat and tidy — you won't find a lot of toys scattered about — and family time spent together is more structured and planned ahead rather than casual."Living room families" has become the latest aspirational term on TikTok. Everyone wants to be a living room family!The implication of being a bedroom family, or having 'room kids', is that perhaps they don't feel safe or comfortable or even allowed to take up room in the rest of the house, or to be around the adults."I remember my brother coming round once and he just sat in silence while watching my kids play in livingroom. After a while he looked at me and said 'It's so nice that your kids want to be around you'" one commenter said on alexxx1915's video."I thought my kids hated their rooms ? turns out they like me more" said another."You broke a generational curse. Good job mama!" said yet another.There's so much that's great about having a family that lives out in the open — especially if you were raised feeling like you had to hide in your room.In my own household, we're definitely a living room family. We're around each other constantly, and the house is often a mess because of it. Learning about this term makes me feel a little better that my kids want to be around us and feel comfortable enough to get their 'play mess' all over the living room. The mess is a sign of the love and comfort we all share together.But the big twist is that it's also perfectly fine if your kids — and you! — like a little more solitary time. Gavyn Alejandro/UnsplashBeing a 'bedroom family' is actually perfectly OK.There's a similar discourse that took place last year about living room parents vs bedroom parents. The general consensus seemed to be that it was better to be a living room parent, who relaxed out in the open versus taking alone time behind closed doors.But it really doesn't have to be one or the other, and neither is necessarily better.Making your kids feel relegated to their room is, obviously, not great. It's not a good thing if they feel like they're not allowed to exist in and play in the rest of the house.But if they just like hanging out in their room? Nothing wrong with that at all! And same goes for parents.Alone time is important for parents and kids alike, and everyone needs different amounts of it to thrive.Kids with certain special needs, like being on the autism spectrum, may be absolutely thrilled to spend lots of time in their rooms, for example.So are you a living room family or a bedroom family? Turns out, it doesn't really matter, as long as your family loves each other and allows everyone to be exactly who they are.This article originally appeared last year.

Robbie Pierce, his husband, Neal Broverman and their two young children were traveling on an Amtrak train in California in 2022 when they were harassed by a fellow passenger at a stop in San Jose. Broverman is the editorial director for print media at Pride, The Advocate's parent company,"All of a sudden, there was a man standing there next to me," Pierce told The Advocate. The man told their son, "Remember what I told you earlier. They stole you and they're pedophiles," Pierce recounts. The man also said that gay people are abominations.The police were called and the man was thrown off the train, but the incident was a frightening reminder that gay families could be the target of bigots, even in liberal Northern California. "It's a new level of homophobia out there," Pierce added.Seven months later, Pierce’s son was the victim of harassment, this time from a child at a park. "A random unattended 7-year-old at the park told me and my son that gay people are the devil,” he recounted in a viral X thread. "My son scoffed, but the boy said it was true because God said so."Pierce reacted to the boy’s hatred — which he probably learned at home — with his own lesson. “I told him parents made up God to make their Kids do what they want. His eyes got so big,” he wrote on X.A random unattended 7yo at the park told me and my son that gay people are the devil and are going to hell. My son scoffed, but the boy said it was true because God said so. I told him parents made up God to make their kids do what they want. His eyes got so big.— ? (@Robbiepierce) September 29, 2022 Addressing complex issues like religion and sexuality with a young child, who’s a stranger, is a tricky needle to thread, so Pierce admits he had some reservations about his response. But he stands by his decision.“I'm sorry but if you teach your kids to hate I'm going to teach them to disobey you," he wrote on X. I'm sorry but if you teach your kids to hate I'm going to teach them to disobey you.— ? (@Robbiepierce) September 29, 2022 As someone who has been harassed by religious, homophobic people in the past, Pierce took the opportunity to help steer a young child away from hatred. At the age of 7, most children believe whatever their parents tell them. However, Pierce planted a seed in the child’s mind that may one day encourage him to challenge his indoctrination when he gets older.The vast majority of commenters on X agreed with Pierce’s response to the child’s comment.But what Robbie said wasn't exactly wrong? And if you're going to hell anyway, why not say it lol.— Sir David Lee ? (@davidleedesign) September 30, 2022 It's honestly probably the best thing Robbie could have said for the well being of the kid.— Alexander the Mediocre (@sunflahr) September 29, 2022 Good on you Robbie! I can’t stop laughing when I think of the conversation that kid is going to have at bedtime tonight.— Miggie (@Miggie07758273) September 30, 2022 Children do not belong to their parents. He is his own person, and so are you. He interacted with a stranger, and you weren't mean to him, you just showed him that there's more to the world than what his parents tell him.You did nothing wrong.— I'm so Dane (@Nikolaj777) September 30, 2022 pic.twitter.com/TmGwohZERg— TCastillo✊?✊? (@lombcast) September 29, 2022 However, some people thought Pierce’s response to the child was inappropriate.maybe because the conversation was with a 7yo child? Are we going to victimize ourselves to THAT degree?This wasn't an admirable way to handle this situation.My personal beliefs don't have anything to do with it. I believe God is Love and I love all the gays. I love children.— PoplarTree (@PoplarTree20) September 30, 2022 That was quite wrong of you to do to a kid.You had a chance to enlighten a child. You could have told him that gay people are just like everyone else and should be respected. Instead you threw his mind into darkness and chaos. You made a bad situation worse.— The Ghost of CJ. (@CarlaJM) September 30, 2022 I’ll take: you are telling the truth and you took the time to own a seven year old kid to make yourself feel better. Very big of you. Or. You are making things up again. Either way, probably not something to hold as a moment of righteousness. Be better.— Jett Breffery (@emolawncare) September 30, 2022 No matter how one feels about Pierce’s reaction, what’s clear is that there is something very inappropriate about a 7-year-old child openly harassing LGBTQ families. The unfortunate problem is that this type of hyper-religious upbringing can cause lasting emotional and psychological trauma to a child. And it’s a common problem. A recent study in the growing field of religious trauma found that 1 in 3 Americans suffer from trauma related to religion at some point in their life.While we might be quick to dismiss the child’s behavior as innocent or simply as a symptom of growing up in a religious household, the more we learn about religious trauma, the more these children appear to be the victims of abuse.This article originally appeared last year.

Humans have debated things large and small over the millennia, from the democracy to breastfeeding in public to how often people ought to wash their sheets. But perhaps the most silly-yet-surprisingly-heated household debate is the one in which we argue over which way to hang the toilet paper roll.The "over or under" question has plagued marriages and casual acquaintances alike for over 100 years, with both sides convinced they have the soundest reasoning for putting their toilet paper loose end out or loose end under. Some people feel so strongly about right vs. wrong TP hanging that they will even flip the roll over when they go to the bathroom in the homes of strangers. Contrary to popular belief, it's not merely an inconsequential preference. There is actually a "correct" way to hang toilet paper, according to health experts as well as the man who invented the toilet paper roll in the first place.First, let's be clear about what we're even talking about here with a visual. In the image below, left is "over" and right is "under." So which one is the right way? According to health experts, "over" is the way to go. "One key to maintaining a hygienic washroom is minimising contact between people and surfaces," Dr. Christian Moro, associate professor of health sciences and medicine at Bond University on Australia's Gold Coast, told Australian Broadcasting Corporation. "Depending on the type of roll holder, [hanging the toilet paper "over"] often lowers the chance that a user will touch the wall behind when fishing for paper, leaving germs behind on that surface which can be spread to the next user."Picture it: Grabbing the end of the toilet paper when it's hung "over" means you only touch the part of the toilet paper you're going to use. When it's "under," you sometimes have to fish for it or scrape your fingers on the wall in order to grab the loose end. In addition to whatever might be on people's hands already, think about all the people who wipe twice, potentially transferring fresh fecal matter or other bacteria to the wall on the second pass, which then get picked up by other people who inadvertently touch that wall when trying to grab their TP. Theoretically, we all should have become better hand washers during the pandemic, scrubbing with soap for the full 20 seconds it takes to remove bacteria. But I wouldn't be willing to bet on it.And touching any surface in a bathroom is pretty nasty, according to a study from the University of Colorado. As Inc. reported: "Using a high-tech genetic sequencing tool, researchers identified 19 groups of bacteria on the doors, floors, faucet handles, soap dispensers, and toilets of 12 public restrooms in Colorado — six men’s restrooms and six women’s restrooms. Many of the bacteria strains identified could be transmitted by touching contaminated surfaces."Bacteria means things like e.coli, which is a common source of food poisoning and one of the most common bacteria found on bathroom surfaces in the study. If you've ever had a bout of food poisoning, I'm sure you'll agree that a toilet paper roll hanging preference isn't worth risking it. But sanitary health concerns aren't the only argument for the "over" camp. After all, the original patent for the toilet paper roll, issued in 1891, clearly shows the TP in the "over" position. Thank you for the clarity right from the get go, Mr. Wheeler.Now, before the "under" folks come running with their pitchforks, there are some understandable exceptions to the "over" rule. Namely: cats and kids.If you have a furry friend or a tiny toddler who likes to unroll the toilet paper roll, "over" makes it super fun for them, while "under" stops them in their tracks. For many people, cats and kids are the primary motivator of their TP hanging habits.That doesn't change the fact that "over" is actually the "correct" way to hang toilet paper according to health science and the inventor's intention, of course, but "under" is certainly preferable to having a pile of TP on the floor.Now go forth, do that with information as you will, and try to make peace with your over vs. under rivals.This article originally appeared last year.

A retired merchant navy engineer in England has found a treasure that would have made his country’s most popular folk hero proud. Graham Harrison, a 64-year-old metal detector enthusiast, discovered a gold signet ring that once belonged to the Sheriff of Nottingham.The discovery was made on a farm in Rushcliffe, Nottinghamshire, 26.9 miles from Sherwood Forest. The forest is known worldwide for being the mythological home of Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men. A central road that traversed the forest was notorious in Medieval times for being an easy place for bandits to rob travelers going to and from London.Today, the forest is a designated National Nature Reserve. It contains ancient oaks that date back thousands of years, making it an important conservation area. “It was the first big dig after lockdown on a glorious day. We were searching two fields. Other detectorists kept finding hammered coins but I'd found nothing,” Harrison said according to the Daily Mail. “Then I suddenly got a signal. I dug up a clod of earth but couldn't see anything. I kept breaking up the clod and, on the last break, a gold ring was shining at me. I broke out into a gold dance.” Gold Ring that Belonged to Real Sheriff of Nottingham.\n\nRead more: https://www.ancient-origins.net/news-history-archaeology/sheriff-nottingham-0016568\u00a0\u2026pic.twitter.com/K7rhf2E62O — Ancient Origins (@Ancient Origins) 1648812786 Harrison sent the ring to the British Museum's Portable Antiquities Scheme to have it authenticated. After doing some research they found that it was once owned by Sir Matthew Jenison, who was the Sheriff of Nottingham between 1683 and 1684.The first accounts of Robin Hood, then known as Robyn Hode, first appear in the 12th century, a few hundred years before Sir Matthew served as sheriff.But there’s no doubt that the archer and leader of Merry Men would have been delighted to know that an everyday guy came into possession of the Sheriff of Nottingham’s ring.Sir Matthew was knighted in 1683 and acted as a commissioner to examine decaying trees in Sherwood Forest. He was later elected to Parliament in 1701. However, a series of lawsuits over shady land dealings would eventually be his ruin and he’d die in prison in 1734.The gold signet ring bears the coat of arms of the Jenison family, who were known for getting rich off a treasure trove of valuables left for safekeeping during the English Civil War. The valuables were never claimed, so the Jenisons took them for themselves.Harrison decided that he would sell the ring to someone who appreciates its importance.“There can't be many people who've found anything like that. I'm only selling it because it's been stuck in a drawer,” Harrison said. “I hope it will go to someone who will appreciate its historical value.” It was sold at auction by Hansons Auctions for £8,500 ($11,115). March Historica & Coin Auction. 24 March \u2014 25 March. The Sheriff of Nottingham\u2019s gold signet ring #Historica #Auction @HansonHistorica\n\nCheck out HansonsAuctions's video! #TikTok https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMLmGN476/\u00a0pic.twitter.com/cbdwbWrqdH — Hansons (@Hansons) 1648055052 WOW! The final moments as the Sheriff of#Nottingham ring goes under the hammer... @HansonHistorica @HansonsAuctions\n@nottslive\n@BBCNottinghampic.twitter.com/NLssFdaksL — Hansons (@Hansons) 1648124323 Let’s hope that the man who sold the ring does what Robin Hood would have done with a piece of jewelry that adorned the hand of a nobleman whose family came into money by taking other people’s loot. Surely, he’d take the proceeds from the auction and give them to the poor.This article originally appeared last year.

The quickest way to stop having a constructive dialog with someone is when they become defensive. This usually results in them digging in their heels and making you defensive. This can result in a vicious cycle of back-and-forth defensive behavior that can feel impossible to break. Once that happens, the walls go up, the gloves come off and resolving the situation becomes tough.Amanda Ripley, author of “High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out,” says in her book that you can prevent someone you disagree with from becoming defensive by being curious about their opinion. Ripley is a bestselling author and the co-founder of Good Conflict, a media and training company that helps people reimagine conflict.How to have a constructive conversationLet’s say you believe the room should be painted red and your spouse says it should be blue. Instead of saying, “I think blue is ugly,” you can say, “It’s interesting that you say that…” and ask them to explain why they chose blue.The key phrase is: “It’s interesting that you say that…” People coming to an agreement. via Canva/Photos When you show the other person that you genuinely care about their thoughts and appreciate their reasoning, they let down their guard. This makes them feel heard and encourages them to hear your side as well. This approach also encourages the person you disagree with to consider coming up with a collaborative solution instead of arguing to defend their position. It’s important to assume the other person has the best intentions while listening to them make their case. “To be genuinely curious, we need to refrain from judgment and making negative assumptions about others. Assume the other person didn’t intend to annoy you. Assume they are doing the best they can. Assume the very best about them. You’ll appreciate it when others do it for you,” Kaitlyn Skelly at The Ripple Effect Education writes. Phrases you can use to avoid an argumentThe curiosity approach can also involve affirming the other person’s perspective while adding your own, using a phrase like, “On the one hand, I see what you’re saying. On the other hand…”Here are some other phrases you can use:“I wonder if…”“It’s interesting that you say that because I see it differently…”“I might be wrong, but…”“How funny! I had a different reaction…”“I hadn’t thought of it like that! For me, though, it seems…”“I think I understand your point, though I look at it a little differently…” Two men high-fiving one another.via Canva/Photos What's the best way to disagree with people?A 2016 study from Yale University supports Ripley’s ideas. The study found that when people argue to “win,” they take a hard line and only see one correct answer in the conflict. Whereas those who want to “learn” are more likely to see that there is more than one solution to the problem. At that point, competition magically turns into collaboration. “Being willing to hear out other perspectives and engage in dialogue that isn’t simply meant to convince the other person you’re right can lead to all sorts of unexpected insights,” psychologist and marketing Professor at Southern Methodist University tells CNBC. In a world of strong opinions and differing perspectives, curiosity can be a superpower that helps you have more constructive conversations with those with whom you disagree. All it takes is a little humility and an open mind, and you can turn conflict into collaboration, building bridges instead of walls. This article originally appeared last year.