genesiustimes.com
BREAKING: The Federal Reserve is just 2 weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon: SOURCE
WASHINGTON, DC—Sources for Genesius Times have confirmed that the Federal Reserve is a mere two weeks from completing a fully operational nuclear weapon. The revelation, provided by a whistleblower known only as “Liquidity Larry,” has sparked widespread panic and an inescapable conclusion: President Donald J. Trump must take decisive action by ordering a preemptive strike on the Fed’s headquarters with bunker-busting bombs.
According to Liquidity Larry, who claims to have worked as a janitor in the Fed’s secretive “Doomsday Vault” beneath the Eccles Building, the nuclear program—codenamed “Operation Hyperinflation Detonator”—began after Chairman Jerome Powell grew frustrated with conventional tools like rate hikes and quantitative easing. “Powell said, ‘If we can’t tame inflation with policy, we’ll just nuke it,’” Larry disclosed in a muffled voice memo. “I saw crates marked ‘Plutonium for Prosperity’ and Janet Yellen sketching warheads on a napkin during a coffee break.”
The alleged weapon, described as a “fiscally prudent” thermonuclear device, is designed to enforce global economic stability by intimidating markets into submission. Insiders claim the Fed plans to test the bomb in an undisclosed location—possibly a deserted Wall Street alley—with Morgan Stanley and BlackRock vying to manage the explosion’s public relations.
Wall Street reeled, with the S&P 500 plunging 1,500 points before rebounding on speculation that a nuclear-armed Fed could “lock in 2% inflation forever.” Financial newsletters and talk radio buzzed with calls for action, with one commentator declaring, “Trump’s gotta drop those GBU-57 bunker-busters and end this madness. No more funny money, no more nukes!”
The logical response, analysts and pundits agree, is clear: Trump, the only leader with the “unmatched courage” to confront the Fed’s shadowy schemes, must authorize a precision strike using bunker-busting bombs to halt the central bank’s nuclear ambitions. “This is bigger than trade deals or media hoaxes,” proclaimed a conservative radio host. “Those Massive Ordnance Penetrators can punch through 200 feet of concrete. Trump’s the guy to save America from Powell’s apocalypse!”
Fed critics feel vindicated but alarmed. “I’ve been warning about their money-printing wizardry for years!” shouted a prominent libertarian economist, brandishing a silver coin. “Now they’re building WMDs! Trump’s the only one who can stop these unelected bankers from turning Main Street into a wasteland!” Mainstream economists are split. One Nobel laureate opined in a blog post that a nuclear Fed “might stabilize expectations,” but warned that “a bunker-busting retaliation could disrupt the money supply’s velocity.”
The public, exhausted by economic volatility, is bracing for chaos. “First, they tanked my savings, then they hiked my rent, and now they’re going nuclear?” groaned Mike Rodriguez, a delivery driver in Phoenix. “If Trump’s got those big bombs, he better use ’em before Powell obliterates my 401(k) for good.”
As the countdown to the Fed’s alleged nuclear debut ticks on, the nation looks to Mar-a-Lago, where sources say Trump is huddling with military advisors about “the best bombs, folks, nobody busts bunkers better than me.” With the Fed’s intentions murky and the world on edge, one thing is certain: if Trump doesn’t act, the next FOMC meeting could have a literal blast radius.
The post BREAKING: The Federal Reserve is just 2 weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon: SOURCE appeared first on Genesius Times.
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