Gen Zers joke that their parents were born in the 1900s as a way to teasingly make it seem like their parents are much older than they actually are. But the kids coming up behind them are either really good at sarcasm or they actually believe the 80s were more like the 1780s. A 7th grade teacher asked her class full of Gen Alphas what they thought the worst part of the 80s was, and no one was prepared for their answers. When most people think about the 80s, they think of big hair teased and sprayed to the gods. Bright colors, roller skates, and people walking around with giant boomboxes on their shoulders (as if everyone wanted to hear their music choices) are also at the top of the list for things that represent the 80s. But when thinking of the worst part of that decade, the lack of things like GPS, cell phones, and search engines would probably be at the top of that list. Retro vibes with bold colors and music! ?✨ #80sFashionPhoto credit: CanvaGen Alpha has other ideas about the worst part of the 80s. If you lived through that decade, you may want to remove your hat so you can scratch your head. The teacher who goes by Meliciousmo on social media recently uploaded the prompt and her students' answers on TikTok, giving viewers a chuckle. One kid answers the prompt with, "No electricity. No good food." It's starting out pretty questionably, but let's give him the benefit of the doubt by assuming his family watches a lot of Little House on the Prairie and his centuries are mixed up. The next kid's response will probably nail it. Well, maybe not. Through a few spelling errors, the response explains that the worst part about the 80s is that they didn't have cars. Yes, this sweet summer child surmised that life was tough because cars didn't exist, so walking everywhere or riding a horse and buggy was imperative. Obviously, this is false, because there were cars in the 80s. They had seatbelts in them for decoration, and kids would slide across the backseat when their dad turned a corner too fast as their mom reflexively extended a stiff arm to stop them from flying out of the car. Confused expression with a questioning gesture.Photo credit: CanvaClearly, some of the students were exposed to either 80s movies or TV shows because a couple of answers were spot on. One student wrote that running out of hairspray was the worst thing about the 80s, while another said, "People listening to other people's phone calls." Yikes. They're right. There were no cell phones, so there were no Bluetooth devices, so everyone was privy to your private conversation. Another child said nothing was bad about the 80s because "they had cool clothes, music, people, and hair." Those are big facts, kid.But other suggestions included having to walk through rivers because of the lack of buses, or the worst part of the 80s: the Cold War. @meliciousmo Every Friday I ask my students a fun question. This was today’s with some of their responses. ??♀️#teachersoftiktok #funnyanswers #genx #middleschool ♬ Don't Stop Believin' (2024 Remaster) - Journey One person writes, "There’s[sic] like 3 kids who know the 1980s are not the same as the 1780s. LOL."Another laughs, "Gosh I’m still tired from walking through all the rivers to school."Someone else thinks the generational gap between parents has something to do with it, "Some of these are spot on…some think we’re over 100 years old! You can tell who has Gen X parents and who has Millennial parents!" Students eagerly participate in a classroom discussion.Photo credit: CanvaBook It pizza party anyone? (Or was that the 90s?) Either way, someone is proposing that iconic classic, writing, "Ok so some good ones, shoulder pads, people listening in to phone calls and hair spary[sic] are all legit. Give those kids a classic 80s pizza paety[sic]!! As for WW2, no tv, cars, and the great depression. Well those kids need a new history book lol."Another person adds a pressure that only those who were adults in the 80s could appreciate, saying, "I didn't even grow up in the 80s and I KNOW it was writing a check at the grocery store with four people behind you and the person behind you had a full belt. The pressure must have been CRIPPLING."

The father-son bond is a beautiful thing. While many dads may think this relationship simply comes naturally, many fathers struggle with the connection.Dad and parenting blogger Pat Barber (@thefathersguild) shared a vulnerable post with his followers about his struggle to connect with one of his sons. In a video shared on Instagram, Barber told viewers, "I'm struggling to connect with my second son right now. It's been brutal. He's so great. But he does so many things that are so hard to overlook in terms of his long-term well being," he says. "How he interacts with people. How he looks people in the eye." - YouTube www.youtube.com Exasperated, he continue,: "Whether or not he listens. And so I have to try something new because right now there's an overwhelming amount of negative conversation that we have relative to the positive. And I don't like how this feels."Barber shares that he needs a new approach. "So today I'm going to try something different, and I'm just gonna tell him that he has to get in the truck," he says. "We're gonna go to Home Depot. We're gonna get him a tool belt, we're gonna get him a hammer., we're gonna get him a little tape measure. And he's going to join me building around the house today, whether he likes it or not. And I'm gonna see if that helps us connect. Helps us feel like we're closer and talk to him throughout the day."He admits that he "doesn't know if this will work," but that he's sticking to it. In another clip, Barber shares an update on how the day went with his son. @thefathersguild If you can do stuff you tend to feel better then if you can’t do stuff ?‍♂️ • Depending on the thing, getting kids to do things can be a slow process. In my opinion the process works best if you model it, then when they ask to join say yes even if it makes more work, then start to ask them to help often but still hold their hand a bit, then pass the torch when they are ready. It’s a multi year process but worth it for your sake and theirs ❤️? • Confidence takes time—for you and for them. ? Subscribe for real talk on growth, parenting, and raising capable kids. ?❤️ ? https://thefathersguild.com/ • #parenting #fatherhood #confidence #raisingcapablekids #teachthemyoung #lifeskillsforkids #fatherhoodjourney #presentparenting #dadswhogiveadamn #modernfatherhood #growthtakesgrit #dadswhoteach #letthembekids #confidencebuilding #kidswhocan #parentingtips #fathersguild #intentionaldad "It's the day after that and that didn't kind of work—it worked really, really well," he says. "I got him all the stuff. We headed back home. We started working. We listened to music. We talked a bunch. We just connected." He explains that instead of just telling his son he enjoyed their time together, he went a step further. "And then afterwards instead of saying, 'Hey, I enjoyed spending time with you' (which I did say that), I wrote him a note and just said, 'Hey, I really enjoyed working with you today. I love working with you. I love spending time with you', and I gave him that note," he says.The intentional time spent with his son turned their relationship around, and Barber encouraged other dads to do the same. "I recommend that. If you're losing some connection, clear your slate when it comes to how you're currently feeling with the kid and just do it," he says. "Just be there and have it be as present as possible and have him help you as much as possible and give him some grace there. But kinda force it. I'm gonna do more of it."Viewers were touched by the honest and relatable post. "Perfection. This is most excellent. Talking with your son, not at him. Outstanding," one commented. Another added, "Hearing a man say the words “I am struggling to connect” for everyone to hear on the internet is so deeply healing." This viewer wrote, "I was a difficult second son, and this is exactly what I wanted (but never got): quality time with my father just being alongside me. Great work, I love your intentionality ??" @thefathersguild Doing is great don’t get me wrong. However if you want to take this experience to the next level remove distractions sit back and watch as much as you can. It’s amazing. I promise❤️?? • Love these moments? FOLLOW for more honest dad reflections, purposeful parenting, and everyday joy. ?❤️?? • #fatherhood #joy #parenting #grattitude #joyfulparenting #mindfulfatherhood #presentparenting #gratitude #fatherhoodjourney #dadlife #findingjoy #parentingtips #familymoments #intentionalparenting #thefathersguild #realparenting #watchandlearn #slowparenting How to connect with your sonIf you struggle to connect with your son, you're not alone. "Dads may struggle to connect with their boys because of unspoken 'rules' they learned during their life: Men/boys don't talk about emotions, men don't show vulnerability, men must uphold the image of a 'strong' man," Angela Gonnella, Psy.D, psychologist and owner at Gonnella Psychological Services, LLC, tells Upworthy. "All these unspoken rules can keep a father distant from his children, especially his boys."Looking for more ways to build your father-son bond? She recommends these three ways to build a stronger connection:1. Kids pick the activity"Spend time passing your son the baton of choosing what to do. Building forts? Listening to music? Building creations with magna-tiles? Let him lead the way," says Gonnella. "You'll show him through your actions that you care about what is fun for him, so wordless connecting! You may also be surprised at how much your kiddo may feel comfortable speaking their minds when their hands are busy!"2. Model emotional language to build connection"Don't be afraid to express your own experiences (age appropriate, of course) with your son to start conversations. It can not only be a model, but paves the way for them to share what's on their minds," she says. "Ex: 'I had such a busy day at work. I had so much to get done in so little time, it was really frustrating. What was your day like?'3. Listen. Like, REALLY listen"What do you know already about your son? What are the small things he says? Take the time to really listen to what he's sharing, no matter how small," Gonnella recommends. "Let him know you're glad he's sharing with you, and that you're there to always listen. This helps kids feel like their parent understands them and cares about what they say."

A wedding planner on TikTok claims that she can predict whether a couple will get divorced by noticing subtle clues during the wedding planning and ceremony. These minor problems are red flags that point to larger, more profound issues happening with the couple. While it may seem like these reasons are signs of unavoidable doom, they can also act as a warning for couples everywhere: if these signs appear in your relationship, get help.“I can tell a bride and groom that's going to get divorced before they even get married,” Robin Yarusso says in a TikTok video. “So I've planned like 100 weddings and probably like 25, 30 proposals, and there are certain things that happen that I've seen time and time again with my brides and grooms that have divorced later on.” @birdie1216 Signs that the marriage will fail during wedding planning #wedding #weddingplanning 1. Cake smash equals catastrophe“If you smash cake, I don't know what it represents, but for some reason, none of my brides and grooms that did that are still together,” Yarusso says in the video. Yarusso told TODAY.com that if the couple "didn't agree on it, didn’t discuss it, or if one said ‘no’ and it still happens, then it’s disrespectful. If the bride looks upset, like ‘Oh my gosh,’ and you didn’t want that to happen—I haven’t had a single couple survive that.”Kevin Thompson, a pastor who has done countless weddings, says that when one person shoves the cake in the other's face unexpectedly, it shows four questionable characteristics: pride, force, revenge, and contempt. All of these characteristics don’t bode well for a happy marriage. 2. Sneaky expenditures“So if I have a bride that's calling me on the side, being like, 'Let's add this to the flowers. Don't tell Jim. Let's do that.' Don't. The don't-tells, those. Those people end up getting divorced,” Yarusso says in the video.When a bride or groom makes secret financial arrangements behind the other’s back, it says two terrible things: they disagree on money—a major predictor of divorce—and that they can’t be trusted. If they’re lying about money, what else are they being dishonest about? A bride is crying at her wedding.via Canva/Photos 3. Pushy mother-in-laws are a curse“If your mother or the groom's mother, the bride's mother, whichever one it is, if that mother is overstepping where she shouldn't and her child doesn't check her, it usually leads to problems in the marriage,” Yarusso says in the video.Toxic family members can put a significant strain on relationships. When spouses can't balance their home life with their outside family, trouble is bound to happen.4. Incompetent, uncaring husband“And then last is the husband who doesn't care about the wedding," Yarusso says in the video. "And I don't mean like, ‘Oh, honey, it's your big day, you pick whatever flowers you want.’ I mean, his one job was to pick the DJ, and we're a week before the wedding, and he hasn't gotten that done. That husband is completely checked out.” When one partner doesn’t carry their own weight, that puts an undue burden on the other, which can lead to powerful resentment, and eventually, divorce. A couple with a "Just Married" sign. via Canva/Photos Sometimes, minor disagreements that people have before they’ve taken the plunge can magnify greatly shortly thereafter, either due to a change in the nature of the relationship or the revealing power of time. So, it’s best for couples looking to get married to take Yarusso’s words seriously. She may not be a therapist, but she’s seen how couples work together first-hand, and nothing puts a stress test on a marriage quite like a wedding. If you’re experiencing problems on the road to saying, “I do,” chances are they may get worse after the cake is in the freezer and the dress is put in storage.

We often think of police officers as the people who enforce laws, arrest suspects, and generally deal with the criminal element of society. But many of the people the police come into contact with aren't criminals. Sometimes they're victims. Sometimes they're people in crisis. When officers respond to a service call, they often find people on their worst day during a difficult time. Ideally, officers are trained to help connect community members with services that can help them, but people often have other needs that are practical, material, and immediate. Financial struggle can compound whatever else is going on, and officers often find themselves either at a loss to help or dipping into their own pockets to meet a small need they know they can do something about. See on Instagram It was a San Diego police officer's act of compassion—buying a snack for a hungry neighborhood child shortly before being shot and killed in 2011—that inspired Brian Spracklen to ask, "What if every officer had the resources to offer similar kindness in moments of vulnerability?" Four years later in Kennewick, Washington, Police Chief Ken Hohenberg (an old friend of Spracklen's) launched a program with the support of community leaders to provide exactly those resources, funded by donations from the local community. That initiative had a profound effect on police-community relations in Kennewick. Officers were able to perform random acts of kindness like buying diapers for a struggling mom, replacing a critical tool that had been stolen, or meeting other essential needs to make someone's situation just a little bit easier. Those acts of compassion help foster greater trust with the community, leading to increased cooperation, improved communication, and enhanced public safety. See on Instagram The success of that pilot program spread. Today, Spracklen and Hohenberg run BlueBridge Alliance, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization that currently partners with 58 police departments across Washington state. BlueBridge's goals are simple:To relieve suffering by providing immediate, on-the-spot, short-term assistance to those in urgent need.To strengthen (and where necessary, restore) mutual trust and respect between the police and the members of the community they serve.To boost police morale and renew officers’ service ethos, leading to improved recruitment and retention.The way it works is simple as well. Each officer is provided a debit card with a certain amount of funds (say, $100 a month) that they can use at their discretion as they see needs arise in their daily work in the community. The continual flow of funds is raised locally, giving the whole community an opportunity help out their neighbors when they need a "hand-up." On-the-spot aid may sometimes be a band-aid for a bigger issue, but as we all know, a band-aid is a big relief when you really need one See on Instagram Though some people believe that it's not a police officer's job to buy someone a bus ticket or groceries to get them through the week, the reality is that the police are often right there on the ground, face-to-face with people in need. Giving officers a way to "serve and protect" in material ways is an efficient method of meeting people's immediate needs, not to mention a means for one human to help another. "It might be surprising for many people to know that most police aren’t out to 'bust' people for doing things," Spracklen tells Upworthy. "They typically get into their profession because they want to help people out. And, most people they have contact with are good people having a bad day or experiencing a rough spot. Our program provides them a tool that can help 'bridge' a gap between what’s needed right now and connecting them with resources that can help them longer-term. This builds trust, improves public safety, and saves money in criminal justice costs to the public."Here's one example of the initiative in action shared by an officer in Pullman, Washington:"I came in contact with a military veteran approximately 80 years old, who was seeking help due to the heat in his apartment not working. The male had made a complaint to the property management and had a work order to be created for the repair of the heat in his apartment unit, though it had not been completed before the weekend. The male had attempted to call the afterhours number for the property and called the Community Action Center, who oversees the apartments he lives in. The male told me he was cold, and did not have the funds to purchase a heater while he waited for the property management to fix his. The male told he had metal plates in his leg due to being in the military and was struggling in the cold. At the time of contact with the male, it was approximately 40 degrees outside with a cold breeze. The male had two more days until it was business hours again to attempt to reach management about the heat again. I attempted to call them myself and was unable to speak with anyone. I then decided to purchase the male a space heater for his apartment until his heating could be fixed. The male was surprised when I arrived with a heater in hand but immediately thanked me for getting one. It was not his fault the management did not fix the heater before ending their workweek, and it felt good to help someone make it through the weekend without being cold." - Officer A. St. Andre See on Instagram Naturally, there are questions about accountability. When officers use the card, they upload their receipts to the BlueBridge system and fill out a report, which provides information about how the funds were used as well as demographic data that helps inform the program. There's also a way to anonymously report a misuse of funds through the BlueBridge website. The heart of the program is compassion, but hard data plays a big role in the program's success. Spracklen says BlueBridge Alliance was founded almost like a tech startup. "We are always looking at metrics, and learning and improving from them—it’s a never-ending cycle," he says, adding that there are unique challenges to getting non-profit efforts off the ground compared to for-profit companies: "There’s a fundraising paradox for nonprofits: The smaller you are, the more expensive it is to obtain funds that are desperately needed. And, you can’t afford to fundraise much when you’re trying to spend people’s donations to achieve your organization's goals for doing good." It costs around $5,000 to get a new community set up with the program. Though BlueBridge Alliance is currently only partnering with precincts in Washington state, there are expansion plans in the pipeline. "We have over 100 law enforcement agencies across the country on our expansion list who are clamoring for a program," says Spracklen. "We’re trying to obtain the funding to get them started up. We found that once started, communities overwhelmingly support their local programs through donations, but it’s the initial hard costs of getting the program started that’s a challenge."People can donate to the general BlueBridge Alliance mission here, and Washington residents can search for their local departments' funds here.

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