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I Listened To Country Radio For The First Time In Years. I Hated It.
This morning I listened to country radio for the first time in years.
Why? Well, I’ve been making fun of it non-stop based on the quality of songs and artist that make and top the charts, but it hit me… I should probably see if anything has changed since I stopped listening to it and started shelling out monthly for Spotify premium.
I live in Northern Virginia, so Washington DC’s 98.7 WMZQ was the choice. It’s an iHeart Country station, meaning it’s a pretty good proxy for what these semi-local, but in actuality, national radio stations are like throughout the country. Don’t hit me with the whole “My small town Oklahoma radio station plays Turnpike Troubadours!!” because that’s not what this was about. I wanted to see what the mainstream radio is like today and if things were any better than the FGL days when I was last a regular listener.
Here’s how it went:
9:40am: Bobby Bones
Turn on the radio station and immediately here Bobby Bones talking about a viral video of a guy exposing his wife as a cheater at his birthday party. Already off to a bad start because I just do not like Bobby Bones… Something about him irks me. Bobby went onto talk about the US States where doctors are most likely to “bungle” your surgery (New York and Pennsylvania) and least likely to “bungle” your surgery (Alabama). Classic morning radio chatter…
9:44am: Corey Kent – “This Heart”
I thought I hadn’t heard this one before but did recognize the chorus… Only know its name because they introed it… Still not off to a great start but maybe things will improve.
9:47am: Commercial Break
Bobby Bones chatter to Corey Kent to commercials? Seems like radio is exactly how I left it… Don’t worry though, they teased the “Tell Me Something Good” segment that was coming after commercial break.
9:55am: Lonestar – “Walking In Memphis”
Okay, now we’re talking. Absolute banger of a song. Lonestar’s version is better than Marc Cohn’s original… I said what I said.
9:59am: More Bobby Bones chatter
One song? That’s all we get it one song in between commercials and the voice of Bobby Bones? I know it’s a radio show but come on. At least he’s plugging his own podcast this time… Why talk about country music when you can talk about yourself?
10:00am: Toby Keith – “How Do You Like Me Now?”
Rally the troops, boys, we got one! Another banger and instant mood lifter.
“Never apologize for being patriotic, fuck ‘em.”#TobyKeithpic.twitter.com/WfnymGJ8Gk
— Whiskey Riff (@WhiskeyRiff) February 6, 2024
10:04am: Dylan Scott – “This Town’s Been Too Good To Us”
Aaaand… we’re back… Didn’t know this song and had to Shazam it. Not good, that’s all I’ll say.
10:07am: Luke Bryan – “Country Song Came On”
Hold up, is this song actually decent? For Luke, I’m impressed.
10:10am: Koe Wetzel – “High Road”
Completely trippy to hear Koe Wetzel on country radio… I knew he was played there but it was the first time I’d actually heard it and my brain refused to accept it for a few minutes.
10:14am: Commercials
More advertisements! Yay!
10:26am: Enter a key word ‘Cash’ to win money!!!
After 12 excruciating minutes of overly excited people telling me how great their products are, I got my first chance to win money by entering the key word of the hour on their website. Used to do this all the time. Didn’t do it today.
10:26am: John Morgan feat Jason Aldean – “Friends Like That”
Cue the country music checklist, please and thank you. John Morgan seems to be a Morgan Wallen wannabe. Had to Shazam this one too, never heard it before but don’t you worry, we name checked Waylon Jennings to show how country we are.
10:29am: Darius Rucker – “Wagon Wheel”
I was worried they’d stopped playing this one. Glad to put my concerns to bed.
10:33am: Tyler Hubbard – “Back Then Right Now”
Even when it’s not Florida Georgia Line, it’s Florida Georgia Line.
10:36am: Riley Green – “Worst Way”
Riley Green is always good with me.
10:40am: Morgan Wallen – “Love Somebody”
Did you know it took 11 people to write this song? Yes, eleven. I’m serious.
10:44am: Promo to win Kenny Chesney tickets
Can you figure out the secret hint in these Kenny Chesney lyrics? If so, you can see him at the Sphere! Caller number nine wins!
10:45am: Commercials
Ads, ads, ads…
10:55am: Locash – “Hometown Home”
Please tell me someone else has heard and saw their song “Isn’t She Country”… It’s so bad, please someone else commiserate with me.
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10:58am: Chase Rice – “Eyes On You”
Couldn’t have played one of his new good ones? Come on now, time to give this one up.
Meet Jack. @WhiskeyRiff @ChaseRiceMusic
Take a listen to the latest episode of Whiskey Riff Raff on Spotify, YouTube, or Apple Podcasts brought to you by Browning. @BrowningArms https://t.co/4bfzIhZqMC pic.twitter.com/jnqpc4BuIp
— Whiskey Riff Raff (@whiskeyriffraff) November 7, 2024
11:01am: Caller number nine trying to win Kenny Chesney tickets.
After years of Spotify listening, ads between songs boils my blood. But listening to caller number nine try to guess where Kenny Chesney tickets are hidden in Dulles Airport was way worse than another car commercial.
11:02am: Jelly Roll – “Halfway to Heaven”
At least no commercials after the interruption. I’m agnostic on this song.
11:06am: Blake Shelton – “Texas”
In the name of being truthful, I’ll say that this song is an groove… Not good, but groovy. Fine, I’ll say it. I like it as a guilty pleasure song.
11:09am: Commercials
YEAH BUDDY
11:20am: Lanco – “We Grew Up Together”
Lanco still makes music? At least the idea behind this song is cute, I didn’t hate it.
11:24am: Start of a “98 minute commercial free ride”
My favorite thing growing up is when there would be a commercial free slot on radio presented by some company and they would say it throughout the time slot. Like, isn’t that a commercial?
11:26am: Morgan Wallen – “I’m The Problem”
Two Morgan Wallen songs in the last 40 minutes… Nice.
11:28am: Taylor Swift – “Teardrops on My Guitar”
Do I love this song? Yes I do. Did it feel out of place? Sure did. Also, this is the first woman I’ve heard, where’s all the ladies?
11:31am: Luke Bryan – “Love You, Miss You, Mean It”
My wife loves this song even though it’s the exact same melody as “Play It Again”…
11:35am: Shaboozey – “A Bar Song”
Can’t believe it took this long for to hear it honestly… catchy but officially sick of it at this point.
11:38am: Cory Kent – “This Heart”
First repeat! Almost exactly 2 hours since it played last time. There’s no other songs we could have fit in this slot?
11:40am: Thomas Rhett – “Life Changes”
Hasn’t left radio since 2016… which is good for Thomas Rhett financially and poor for fans of better country music.
11:43am: Jelly Roll – “Liar”
Anyone else getting a bit of Jelly Roll fatigue… I like the guy and some of his music but it’s just been a lot recently.
11:47am: Parmalee – “Take My Name”
If I was going to listen to a Parmalee some you could have at least given me “Carolina” and I could have reminisced on the glory days…
11:50am: Joe Nichols – “Gimmie That Girl”
Joe Nichols is great.
11:53am: Post Malone and Morgan Wallen – “I Had Some Help”
Two hours in and the first appearance of Mr. Post Malone… Interesting.
11:55am: Carly Pearce – “Truck On Fire”
Is, is this… a woman? Congratulations, country radio. You finally played a woman.
11:58am: Baily Zimmerman – “Where It End”
And let’s wash away that good Carly Pearce with the Warren Zeiders of Brantley Gilberts…
Bailey Zimmerman is the Warren Zeiders of Brantley Gilberts#CMAawards
— Whiskey Riff (@WhiskeyRiff) November 21, 2024
To be honest, I don’t really know what that means, but at the same time, I know exactly what it means… you know what I mean?
12:00pm – National Anthem
Should have been Stapleton’s version, but still… USA USA USA.
I love you Reba, but… nobody is topping Chris Stapleton’s national anthem.
pic.twitter.com/gYLnpaZVoo
— Whiskey Riff (@WhiskeyRiff) February 11, 2024
12:03pm: Dylan Marlowe & Dylan Scott – “Boys Back Home”
Well this song is just straight up bad, now isn’t it? My goodness.
12:06pm: Riley Green – “Worst Way”
Couldn’t have changed up the Riley Green song if you’re going to play him for the second time in an hour and a half?
12:10am: Luke Combs – “Going, Going, Gone”
Here we go, finally a good song, like an actual good song. This and the early Toby Keith track have to take the cake for best of the day…
That’s it for me, I’m stopping here and at least leaving on a good note.
Conclusion – Country radio is still not fun to listen too, and I didn’t have a good time.
The post I Listened To Country Radio For The First Time In Years. I Hated It. first appeared on Whiskey Riff.
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