The outrage over Alabama using the previously untested method of nitrogen gas to execute 58-year-old Kenneth Eugene Smith on Thursday night isn’t misplaced. The use of any human being as a “guinea pig” for a method of execution‚ in the words of Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor‚ makes the blood boil.  But there’s a chance that the focus on Smith‚ whom Alabama tried and failed to kill in 2022‚ will distract attention from the much larger outrage: that our country is still pulling human...

When it comes to babysitting‚ you can hit the jackpot with someone who not only enjoys hanging out with your kiddos but also cleans out of boredom. The only babysitter I've had that experience with is my mom‚ but I do hear they do exist. While walking into a spotless house after a much-needed night out would be amazing‚ it's not really part of a standard babysitting package.Typically‚ whoever babysits for you is solely there to focus on the well-being of your children. They feed them snacks‚ play games with them‚ and follow their bedtime routine to the letter. Then they hang out on your couch reminding Netflix that they're still watching and wait for you to return. Sure‚ they clean up dishes from dinner and whatever toys were pulled out during their time with your kids‚ but they don't typically clean your house.But in a private parenting group I belong to‚ a long debate was started when a mom asked a group of 260k of her closest friends if it would be appropriate for a parent to ask a babysitter to clean their home.The anonymous mom explained that her college-aged daughter had recently started babysitting for a family‚ but on the second day‚ her duties suddenly changed. There was a list of chores waiting for the babysitter that included cleaning the family's dishes and cleaning up messes that were there before the sitter arrived. This revelation set off a firestorm of comments with many agreeing that anything outside of cleaning up after the children while they're in your care is a separate job. But not everyone was on the same page and it was clear that this was a topic that was going to cause some intense debate. Since summer months are here‚ there's no wonder this topic is coming up and views are split. Scary Mommy recently published an article posing a similar question‚ only this was coming from a parent who wanted her babysitter to clean while her children slept. Elizabeth Narins explains that she and her husband are stretched thin and have an active toddler she jokingly calls a "toy tornado." "Given the amount of housework that clearly needs to be done‚ paying someone to sit on our toy-covered couch during naps or after bedtime just seems... inefficient‚" Narins wrote before posing the question. "Is it completely out of line for me to ask her to declutter when my kids are in bed?"Whether it's the expert interviewed for the Scary Mommy article or the parents in the private group‚ there does seem to be one common theme among the discourse: Any additional chores should be clarified in the original job description‚ and if it wasn't‚ then it should be directly brought up in a conversation with the babysitter. Many parents in the comments believed that a housekeeper should be hired in addition to the babysitter‚ while others thought the babysitter should be offered more money for the additional work. But there were several people who thought it was just common courtesy for a babysitter to clean the house while the kids were asleep.It may seem that you're paying a babysitter to do nothing while your children sleep‚ but you're paying them to be there in the event of an emergency. No matter which side of the debate you're on‚ it seems proper communication about expectations will save everyone a headache in the future. Do you think cleaning should be expected from a babysitter?This article originally appeared on 6.8.23

Social media has made it very easy to alter your appearance using filters. They may come in handy when you need to record a video but look a bit under the weather—just turn on a soft glow or a makeup filter‚ and boom‚ you're camera-ready in less than two seconds. But there has been a lot of talk around the use of filters and teen girls' self-esteem and unrealistic expectations seemingly placed on women.One woman has taken it upon herself to strip away the filters to prove that‚ while she is beautiful‚ her face doesn't actually look the way it does with the filter on. The most interesting thing about these filters is that they're so good‚ you can't tell they're filters. Gone are the days of filters that made everyone look like a Glamour Shot from the 90s. These filters move with you and even have pores so no one can tell it isn't actually your face. Well‚ it is your face—kinda.Mimi Webb starts off the 20-second clip using the infamous Bold Glamour filter. It's the filter that has people questioning their perception of their own faces because the contrast is so jarring. But Webb doesn't stop with one filter. She puts on another and makes sure she emphasizes her use of a ring light. After turning the ring light off and taking all the filters off as the video is ending‚ the woman removes her makeup‚ revealing an inflamed‚ irritated and blemished face. People flocked to the comments to thank her for exposing the truth behind filters."You're beautiful &; this message is SO important thanks for the reminder‚" one person wrote."You are beautiful. In real life‚ we all have imperfections. As a mature woman‚ I appreciate your honesty. Thank you‚" another said. "Thank you so much. You did not know how much this was needed‚" a woman commented. Social media can really do a number on people's self esteem‚ especially when they're comparing themselves to something that's not real. Messages like the one Webb shared can help pull back the curtain on the reality of social media. Watch her video below. @missmimiwebb #greenscreenvideo This article originally appeared on 6.9.23

Is your picture of an ideal weekend staying at home‚ noshing on snacks and television rather than actual peopling? If the answer is yes‚ you’re not alone. Well‚ you might be physically‚ but not in your preference to be antisocial Friday through Sunday. Recently‚ a woman named Christina Kwong admitted in a TikTok clip that weekends felt “different” now‚ that she was perfectly content with “a slice of cake and a maybe can of sparkling water” in lieu of going out. She wondered if others felt the same‚ and whether this was just a result of getting older or some bigger phenomenon. Kwong’s video got a huge response online which began a discussion about how habits built during the pandemic plus financial constraints were largely to blame. "If I leave my house I spend at least 100 dollars‚" one viewer said. "Everything is so expensive it's not fun anymore." Another wrote‚ “2020 made a lot of us really value the peace of being home‚ to which Kwong replied‚ “I think this is the core of it 💯.” @christinakdub Anyone else just love to do nothing on weekends? Is it age? Or is everyone feeling this way? 😆 #weekendvibes #weekend #tired #fyp #gettingold #collective #friday #saturday #sunday ♬ original sound - Christina ✨ daily vlogs ✨ And perhaps this latter point isn’t all bad. In a discussion with Business Insider licensed clinical psychologist Yasmine Saad noted that while continued social isolation might be a coping mechanism to modern day anxieties‚ another factor is that people simply no longer feel social obligation the same way‚ and are more comfortable embracing “their preferred style of recharging.” Which‚ in many people’s cases‚ is of a more introverted nature. While this might be true‚ Danielle Bayard Jackson‚ aka “The Friendship Expert” and author of "Fighting for Our Friendships‚" urges that the concept of “learned loneliness” shouldn’t be overlooked either.Using data from a 2023 article in The Atlantic‚ Jackson listed off a slew of research findings showing that nearly 60% of people have not returned to pre-pandemic activities‚ remote work has tripled from 2019 to 2021 and that 35% of people say that socializing is less important to them.She then cited a report from the American Psychological Association saying that finances were the #1 source of stress for 2023. @thefriendshipexpert #stitch with @Christina ✨ daily vlogs ✨ ♬ original sound - Danielle Bayard Jackson Jackson acknowledged that all these factors causing folks to want to stay home were valid‚ but argued that just because this behavior is more common‚ “it doesn't make it good for you‚” reiterating how countless studies show the direct impact social connectedness has on our well-being. In essence‚ getting back into a healthy social habit is similar to re-adopting any healthy habit. There’s a period of resistance and discomfort before the benefits return.Jackson then clarified that making meaningful social interactions doesn’t have to be getting drunk with friends on weekends‚ but rather getting involved in things that interest you‚ with people who energize you. Sometimes with close friends‚ sure. But other times‚ just community. While there is a lot of nuance involved with this topic‚ and certainly no one-size-fits all solution‚ discernment and balance seems to be helpful tools. Knowing exactly why we might be saying no to weekend plans‚ plus making sure to round out our schedules with interactions that matter to us. In other words‚ there’s nothing wrong with a Friday night filled with cake slices enjoyed in solitude now and then…but maybe not every night.

There are basically two universal truths about grieving a loved one. One‚ there is no "normal" way to grieve—it's entirely individual. And two‚ no one should judge another person's grief process.A video of a woman picking up her husband's ashes started an important conversation about what grief looks like and why someone would choose to share such a personal moment with the world. Adriana Sansam's husband‚ Eric‚ died unexpectedly in the spring of 2023 at age 30‚ turning the beautiful life they were building with their three small children upside down. Since Eric's death‚ Sansam has been sharing snippets of her grieving process on her Instagram page‚ and one of those snippets was a video of her in her car before and after picking up Eric's ashes. We see her break down before she leaves the car and again after she returns and cradles the urn that holds her husband's remains. Some people questioned and even criticized Sansam for filming and sharing those moments‚ which prompted grief advocate Nora McInerny to post a video response in her defense.McInerny‚ whose husband died in 2014‚ has given a Ted Talk on grief‚ has written multiple books on the topic and is the host of the award-winning podcast "Terrible‚ Thanks for Asking" and the daily podcast "It's Going To Be Okay." In other words‚ she''s well-versed in the grieving process.In the caption of her response‚ McInerny wrote: "You don't have to grieve publicly‚ but I'll personally fight anyone who wants to judge people who *do* put it out there. Consider it a public service for those who haven't walked that path yet; our culture is so grief-averse that we are rarely forced to see someone else's pain and anguish. You don't have to like it‚ but you *also* don't have to comment on it."In the video‚ she explains why someone might choose to film an intense grieving moment."I wish I had any video evidence of how this felt‚" she said. "Grief is so disorienting. It feels like you made it up. And grief needs a witness. And you know what? Consider yourself lucky if you don't know why she would film it. But she's filming it for you. She's filming it so that if you find yourself in this unfortunate position or know someone who does‚ you know what grief actually looks like." McInerny is right. We don't see grief very often in our society‚ and it's even more rare that we see it being experienced and expressed publicly. People usually do their intense grieving in private‚ either because that's what they feel most comfortable with or because that's what other people feel most comfortable with. But grieving isn't comfortable. It's messy and intense and unpredictable. It has no set trajectory and no timeline. And if we never see grief in all its raw‚ real glory‚ we might feel like something's wrong with us if (or when) we go through a tragic loss ourselves. Those commenting negatively may have learned something if they'd simply read some of the other comments on Sansam's video. Person after person shared their stories of understanding and solidarity as well as their gratitude to Sansam for showing what she was experiencing:"❤️😢 Some people may think it's strange to post about grief‚ but honestly I appreciate every single account I come across 😢 and send love and healing energy to everyone who understands the loss of a loved one. 🙏🏽""You know that hug-the-vase thing? Yes‚ that’s real‚ because that’s the closest we’ll ever get to hugging them again. I hugged my father’s urn every chance I could‚ knowing I can’t hug him again til the next life. 🙏🏼 Hug your loved ones if you still get a chance‚ but that hug then breaking down while doing it. Thats as real as it gets. 💙 Stay strong‚ praying for you. 🙏🏼""I’m so sorry… My daughter Azalea passed away in December and picking up her ashes was one of the hardest days of my life. It made her death feel so final. 💔""So sorry for your loss! I lost my wife in December. She was only 47. I also lost my son in June who was only 12. Know you’re not alone. Lean on friends‚ lean on family. Most important‚ talk to him every day. Ask him for signs to help ease the pain. He will come through for you. Love lasts forever! 🙏🏻❤️""I lost my husband young… it’s a painful thing to live with❤️❤️what I can tell you is that the pain and grief will become less consuming. You can do this….""I wept at this video for you and for my 42 year old self that had to do the same thing. I remember going by myself to pick them up and just breaking down in the car. I’m so so sorry you went through this at such a young age! Hugs‚ my widow sister." ❤️"I picked my Mom up in January. I drove the roads we knew so well through San Diego and talked to her about the memories in each area. I think I just kept talking because I would have lost my mind thinking about the reality of what I was doing. Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable moment. May he rest in peace."The bottom line is if we haven't been through it ourselves‚ we have no right to judge. And even if we have experienced something similar‚ everyone's process is different and what seems weird to one person might be normal or necessary for another‚ so we still shouldn't judge. Thank you‚ Nora McInerny‚ for the important reminder.

A retired merchant navy engineer in England has found a treasure that would have made his country’s most popular folk hero proud. Graham Harrison‚ a 64-year-old metal detector enthusiast‚ discovered a gold signet ring that once belonged to the Sheriff of Nottingham.The discovery was made on a farm in Rushcliffe‚ Nottinghamshire‚ 26.9 miles from Sherwood Forest. The forest is known worldwide for being the mythological home of Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men. A central road that traversed the forest was notorious in Medieval times for being an easy place for bandits to rob travelers going to and from London.Today‚ the forest is a designated National Nature Reserve. It contains ancient oaks that date back thousands of years‚ making it an important conservation area. “It was the first big dig after lockdown on a glorious day. We were searching two fields. Other detectorists kept finding hammered coins but I'd found nothing‚” Harrison said according to the Daily Mail. “Then I suddenly got a signal. I dug up a clod of earth but couldn't see anything. I kept breaking up the clod and‚ on the last break‚ a gold ring was shining at me. I broke out into a gold dance.” Gold Ring that Belonged to Real Sheriff of Nottingham.\n\nRead more: https://www.ancient-origins.net/news-history-archaeology/sheriff-nottingham-0016568\u00a0\u2026pic.twitter.com/K7rhf2E62O — Ancient Origins (@Ancient Origins) 1648812786 Harrison sent the ring to the British Museum's Portable Antiquities Scheme to have it authenticated. After doing some research they found that it was once owned by Sir Matthew Jenison‚ who was the Sheriff of Nottingham between 1683 and 1684.The first accounts of Robin Hood‚ then known as Robyn Hode‚ first appear in the 12th century‚ a few hundred years before Sir Matthew served as sheriff.But there’s no doubt that the archer and leader of Merry Men would have been delighted to know that an everyday guy came into possession of the Sheriff of Nottingham’s ring.Sir Matthew was knighted in 1683 and acted as a commissioner to examine decaying trees in Sherwood Forest. He was later elected to Parliament in 1701. However‚ a series of lawsuits over shady land dealings would eventually be his ruin and he’d die in prison in 1734.The gold signet ring bears the coat of arms of the Jenison family‚ who were known for getting rich off a treasure trove of valuables left for safekeeping during the English Civil War. The valuables were never claimed‚ so the Jenisons took them for themselves.Harrison decided that he would sell the ring to someone who appreciates its importance.“There can't be many people who've found anything like that. I'm only selling it because it's been stuck in a drawer‚” Harrison said. “I hope it will go to someone who will appreciate its historical value.” It was sold at auction by Hansons Auctions for £8‚500 ($11‚115). March Historica &; Coin Auction. 24 March \u2014 25 March. The Sheriff of Nottingham\u2019s gold signet ring #Historica #Auction @HansonHistorica\n\nCheck out HansonsAuctions's video! #TikTok https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMLmGN476/\u00a0pic.twitter.com/cbdwbWrqdH — Hansons (@Hansons) 1648055052 WOW! The final moments as the Sheriff of#Nottingham ring goes under the hammer... @HansonHistorica @HansonsAuctions\n@nottslive\n@BBCNottinghampic.twitter.com/NLssFdaksL — Hansons (@Hansons) 1648124323 Let’s hope that the man who sold the ring does what Robin Hood would have done with a piece of jewelry that adorned the hand of a nobleman whose family came into money by taking other people’s loot. Surely‚ he’d take the proceeds from the auction and give them to the poor.This article originally appeared on 04.06.22

"I always was a rebel." The post Why John Lennon considered himself a “loudmouth lunatic” first appeared on Far Out Magazine.

A beautiful tribute to a musical icon. The post The song Stevie Wonder played as a tribute to Marvin Gaye first appeared on Far Out Magazine.